Hi just looking for some advice. Me and my partner have only been in a relationship for 14 months n we have a 3 month old, however I have known him for ever.... I absolutly love him, but how do I get him to engage more with our son, and as a family. On his days off from work he is out by 6, surfing then on his motor bike. He plays with his son after work if his not to tired. When I mention it he says well I don't want to sit around all day, bored... I miss him as we were inseprable before the littleman came along. Since the birth of my son I have had 2 breaks from him, and that was to do grocerie shopping. And its looking like I will have to go back to work in 6 weeks as my partner has the minimum wage which will not support us, but he dosnt want me to work even 1 day, as he will have to watch our son...... I just don't no wat to do.

Hi just looking for some advice. Me and my partner have only been in a relationship for 14 months n we have a 3 month old, however I have known him for ever.... I absolutly love him, but how do I get him to engage more with our son, and as a family. On his days off from work he is out by 6, surfing then on his motor bike. He plays with his son after work if his not to tired. When I mention it he says well I don't want to sit around all day, bored... I miss him as we were inseprable before the littleman came along. Since the birth of my son I have had 2 breaks from him, and that was to do grocerie shopping. And its looking like I will have to go back to work in 6 weeks as my partner has the minimum wage which will not support us, but he dosnt want me to work even 1 day, as he will have to watch our son...... I just don't no wat to do.

hmmmm maybe he isint confident with ur lil man??i no some guys dont like being left alone with a lil one,and some think its boring when there so little,which i dont understand but thats some males for u lol....??i dunnu just i no a few dads that are like that???

I had the same issue with my DH, and we sat down and had a bit conversation about it. It took him a while to work it out himself, but it turns out he was scared of our DD.

He didn't know what to do with her, how to play with her or look after her. It isn't something that comes naturally to everybody.

I started slowly with him, getting him to do little things when I was there and not stepping in (even when it took him forever, or wasn't done the way I like it). Now he is confident with her and enjoys 'daddy time' with her.

Just a thought.

My husband wasn't very interested in ours until they could interact with him or move, 6+ months. He's just going to have to look after him, unless he wants to get more work... And he probably should get more practice if you're not going to be there. My husband doesn't do things like I would, but they have been looked after fine, it was when they got older it went a bit pear shaped. 2 trips to hospital, then he realized when you're watching them, you have to actually be near them watching. But when their young it's easier. He's great now and loves it so much he convinced me to have #3 (though it didn't take much convincing). Good luck and I hope he comes around quickly.

My DP was the same with our DD until she was about 6-7 months old.

I think some guys are scared of them, us mothers have a maternal intinct and just know what to do and what baby wants.

Maybe try and have a chat with him in a calm environment. Maybe suggest he starts doing little things for you son, like running him a bath, getting his clothes out for you ect..

I takes time but you will get there! Wait until your little man is running around and you will be wondering what you were worrying about to begin with!

Good luck smile