My partner and I have been together since our late teens always dremt of a little family with three kids. In 2009 I gave birth to my beautiful daughter, she had colic and I had real hard ride of it with her and my partner was hardly around found any excuse to disapear.

Now two years later I just had a boy (every mans dream a BOY!) The day I went into labour he was hard to find and when he finaly turned up he told me not to get impatient with him, while I was at the height of my contractions, thats not the worse of it he spent the whole birth and afterward outside playing on the computer

Now, this is the real reason for this post.. he wont do a thing! He wont pick his son up not ONCE! He could even be involved with naming him sobi gave him a name now he descided he hates it!

There have been times that i dont get ten minutes day or night when i get my arms free of either a newborn or a very demanding toddler. He thinks NUMBER 1 was a better, quiet child but she was worse but he wont have a clue because he disapeared for days at a time.

I know post natal depression is a huge possiblity but not only wont he help he is emotionally insensitive he will tell my daughter that i dont love her while im busy with NUMBER2 making her behaviour worse.

I'm honestly ready to comit myself to a lunatic aslyum just to get away for a few days so that my partner knows how it feels to console two children at the same time!

I would like him to bond but it has become more and more dificult. I've burnt my throat shouting, and talked to him calmly all he wants to do is live in ignorant bliss!

Please someone ANYONE help!

It sounds like you really need to get away. Is there any possibility of you leaving the kids with family and going away by yourself for a few days without DP?

Sending big hugs to you!! sounds like you do need a break but I'm not sure leaving him with the kids would be such a good idea, he doesn't sound like he would do all the right things, especially if he's not doing them with you there. Is there a family member who can come and stay for a few days? or you stay with them with the kids? or even a close friend? It sounds like there's some deeper issue with him that needs sorting out, maybe suggest counselling? I know it's easy for us to make suggestions and it's harder for you to try them, but you need to think of yourself and your little ones and decide what's best for you and them and your relationship. I hope it all works out for you, good luck!

Sending big hugs to you!! sounds like you do need a break but I'm not sure leaving him with the kids would be such a good idea, he doesn't sound like he would do all the right things, especially if he's not doing them with you there. Is there a family member who can come and stay for a few days? or you stay with them with the kids? or even a close friend? It sounds like there's some deeper issue with him that needs sorting out, maybe suggest counselling? I know it's easy for us to make suggestions and it's harder for you to try them, but you need to think of yourself and your little ones and decide what's best for you and them and your relationship. I hope it all works out for you, good luck!

I'd love to say I have a great support network but my family lives in Wellington and I live in Whangarei. My partners family are close by, I just feel like I would be deemed as a bad mum because I can't cope with both my children and my partner.

The thing that erks me the most is I know he can be a good dad, and his ADHD wont be helping things.

I've read up on child neglect and rejection and I don't want that to happen.

I'd love to say I have a great support network but my family lives in Wellington and I live in Whangarei. My partners family are close by, I just feel like I would be deemed as a bad mum because I can't cope with both my children and my partner.

The thing that erks me the most is I know he can be a good dad, and his ADHD wont be helping things.

I've read up on child neglect and rejection and I don't want that to happen.

asking for help means you're a good mum who knows when she needs a time out so she can better care for her kids! I've got 2 under 2 and it's hard, we've been having major sleep issues and surviving on 4-5 hrs sleep a night has me pretty stressed out. If you have a good relationship with someone on his side maybe try and talk to them about what is happening, your fears and worries and what you want to happen. I really hope things do get better for you, maybe take a weekend away with the kids to visit your family and ask them if they can help you out for those days just to give you a break.

"It sounds like you really need to get away. Is there any possibility of you leaving the kids with family and going away by yourself for a few days without DP? "

I agree with this opinion and You'd better have ur social zone.

Anyway, wish you happy everyday even there is sth unsatisfying