I'm not sure

With everything that being going on with the sil & bil i don't know what going to happen next.

MIL told us that if they have a go at us to say something. So now with what happened xmas eve and hubby telling sil that she doesn't respect us has parents.

I told him to leave it but he said that it was the final straw for him.

This has being going on for over 3 years when i was pregnant with little master it started. And now i feel low.

I'm second guessing myself. I scared what will happen next with this.

I don't want to talk to talk to sil about anything because she not easy to talk to incase something set her off.

Would you try & work on things so everyone gets along or leave it and see what happens.

I'm sorry. I want to help, but I have no idea of the back story. unsure

What are you scared about?

ahhhh dh is home now, I will have to go.

Hope you find a way to feel better about everything.

Basically though......don't let anyone else tell you how to parent your own kids. Its ok to do it differently.
xxxx

I'd leave it, if your SIL has blocked you on facebook I'd take that as she wants no contact.

From all your posts about them what I gather is that you dont get along and dont like eachother so let it go... unless you like the drama.

My sil has some issues.

Her style of parenting is totally different to mine. I respect her but don't agree with things she does but keep it to myself.

It started when i was pregnant. Her telling me things. When i had little master that i was doing this wrong that i shouldn't be running around after him. Plus she said i should be letting him eat by himself at the time he was about 9 months old. I told her that when he can hold the spoon by himself and get the food in i will let him do it.

When MIL lived with us they came around every few days. Block our driveway so we couldn't get in or out and when ask to move their car we were told No. The week before my dad pass away i was in the shower with little master & the water went dead cold. Turned out that SIL & BIL and their 3 kids where in the shower down stairs. I told MIL to get them out that we were in the shower. I end up sick and miss the last week of my dad life.

Little man was born and i was told i left hospital to fast, didn't like the fact i ask for no vistors my first weekend home. And that we didn't want godparents for him since it caused problems with FIL when we chose god parents for out first. They are little master godparents.

I have routine for my kids, she doesn't believe in them.

She says she doesn't feel welcomed in our home and we don't feel welcomed in theirs.
We use to work around them to make them happy. Hubby put his foot down and said it time to put us and our family needs first.

I don't know what MIL has said to them. We told them that they can't just drop around that if they want to come around please ring to make sure it ok and that we home.

I cry about this. I don't get to see my nieces or nephews every week anymore. They don't agree with us with our wishes for our lives. My BIL hasn't said anything. I keep away from them for fear of being told what we doing with our kids is wrong.

My kids know that everyday we their for them. We respect their needs and i hate being away from them.

MIL doesn't like them dropping over but too chicken to say anything.
Little master is the type of kid that loves running around. When we had his brother we ask for no vistors so we could put his needs first. We wanted him to get use to his brother and know that we still there for him. Plus little master got sick. So was glad we had no vistors.

Happy head- your right. It's a sign but i don't want to lose not seeing my neices & nephews.
We use to get along, it as long has we keep our thoughts to ourselves and do what they want.

My sil issues are to do with depression. Don't know what- it's none of my business. But she always says my kids are bad and yours are good.

Your kids shouldnt be around someone as rude as that not a good role model.You also shouldnt be treated like that.I would cut her off.

its really tough when someone you love is so negative. I don't think you should cut them out completely - unless they are totally toxic. I think you need to stand your ground though and not get so caught up in what they might think of you. Its possible to love someone, do things differently and have different opinions. You need to work on being confident enough in yourself, so whatever she says or does doesn't effect you.
It doesn't matter if she says what you are doing with your kids is wrong. There are many roads in parenting. wink You can just tell her we do it differently, I don't want to hear any more about it. Smile politely and go about your business. It may be a power struggle for her, or even a justification of her own choices. It might be hard for her to watch you do it different as she might be second guessing her own decisions. Instead of thinking you might be onto something, she might just try and put you down to propel her own sense of worth.

You could take a break from seeing them for a while and get clarification of what you want out of it all, then come up with techniques for dealing with it. It sounds like she is running you all ragged and as a family MIL included, you need to tell her how it is and stop letting her walk all over all of you. She may have issues, but a family needs to say that is not acceptable, can we help you in some way or provide help for her. Not put up with her bad behavior out of fear of how she may act.

sounds very rough. I hope you find a way to start fresh in the new year so you are not only comfortable but thriving in your new found family role!
xxx

Hubby has told them before that you do it your way & we do it our way.

Our boys are happy most of the time. They get our full attention when we not busy.

Their kids are so cute and yes they are a handful but they had the kids so they have to deal with them. MIL babysits alot. And i don't do that unless it for something like a dinner with friends.

I have told my sil that all kids have their naughty moments you just have to smile threw it.

Hubby said he doesn't want them around, but he from a small family and i like everyone to get along.

We away on holidays so it good to be away from all of that.

I do have to stop worrying about what they have said to us. But it hard at the moment.

She doesn't want help with her depression. She has said its to do with stress but her hubby & her mum and our MIl do alot for her to help out with her kids.

that is great that she has support around her.

Now you have to concentrate on you and what you need for your family to interact with them in a positive way. Just because she has depression, it doesn't mean she can treat you that way. Sometimes people need you to tell them how to treat you, especially if their reality is clouded by personal issues...

Right now darl it will hurt about the fall out but in time it gets easier and you see that life may just be easier with out the stress of there drama.
Dps "mum" is a .... (too rude to write lol) and at the start I was sad like how can you not see your own son let alone your own grandchildren the twins were tiny newborns when all this crap happened and now there 16 months old and she would not have a clue who they are what they look like I had a lot of issues of dd1 missing her but now she has no clue who she is they only know dps step mum as there nan now and my mum of course.
What I'm getting at is let time pass if she is a real pain in the ass have time out to clear your head and see if there is a solution but if she is like my b!tch in law there is no choice but to let it go and live your life how you want it to be with out the negativity of others.
I hope things get better but with a person who is set in there ways and head strong it's like talking to a wall good luck xxx

I don't tell any other mother how to raise their kids.

Being thinking about this and coming getting close to making up my mind up on the cutting sil out of our lives