Gave up on breastfeeding

Hi ladies,

Just given birth to number 2 a couple of days ago.
Started breastfeeding fine but ds did nipple damage on his first feed. But was still persevering. Then last night was feeding and my nipple started bleeding really bad! So I sent dp to get formula so I could give my nipples a break - i kno ur just meant to keep going but was in complete agony. Then today the other nipple started bleeding! So I'm giving up on breastfeeding. I feel so guilty and useless has i breastfed with my first for the first 3mths and wanted to do the same with this bubs sad. Now to top it all off I think my milk is coming in and am going to end up with mastitis like with my first!

Are you sure you've completely given up? If your milk is only just coming in then you could still keep going. The bleeding nipples are horrible I know, I would just feed one boob at a time so the other had a good 6 hour break between feeds, used heaps of lanolin and exposed them to air. They heal really fast! You could still express as well. Good luck and congrats on your bub!

poor thing! i agree with the lanolin - lather them its brilliant! also dont forget the hormone drop around now where everything is so much harder. i think i cried all day. it gets heaps better though and really quickly. your nipples are just getting used to it and that plus afterbirth pains plus bleeding plus newborn - its a rough time. have you got someone to pamper you, do housework, make meals. when feeding for the first few days i put a dvd on to make me laugh and distract me. although i used to stamp my feet with the pain and tears flowed. i found the palmers cocoa nipple butter and the lansinoh helped so much! also feeding laying down and changing position helped too. remember you are both learning, its really hard at the moment. hope you feel better soon and enjoy that lovely squishy baby!!

I agree with others who have commented - you don't sound as though you are happy to give up on breastfeeding? I do understand the pain of cracked bleeding nipples, but it doesn't last long if bub is attaching correctly (although feels like it is going on forever). Lanolin is great, so is using your own milk straight after a feed and letting it air dry. Be careful taking your bra off if you've bled onto your clothing and it has stuck (ouch). I'd really encourage you to keep trying, perhaps even if you give a bottle in between breastfeeds just until your nipples heal a bit, which should only take a day or two and then you could start trying to only BF again?

If you decide that you can't keep going, try not to get down on yourself, but remember breastfeeding is hard (and sometimes painful) work in the early days, but it gets easier and you only get one go at doing it

While I agree with all advice already given and personally think that persistance is key in the early weeks, at the end of the day a happy mum feeding her baby formula is better than an unhappy mum feeding her baby breastmilk.

Don't be hard on yourself if it doesn't work out. As long as your baby is nourished and loved who cares how you do it.

While I agree with all advice already given and personally think that persistance is key in the early weeks, at the end of the day a happy mum feeding her baby formula is better than an unhappy mum feeding her baby breastmilk.

Don't be hard on yourself if it doesn't work out. As long as your baby is nourished and loved who cares how you do it.

the post isn't about bf in general. She is on day 2. Most women go through periods of breastfeeding where they are not happy. It really hurts or they are tired. You don't just stop because you have a day of being miserable, same as you don't quit a job or a relationship because you have a bad day/week. I absolutely agree that bf shouldn't be at the demise of the mental health of the mother, but there are periods of adjustment where the days aren't great.

the post isn't about bf in general. She is on day 2. Most women go through periods of breastfeeding where they are not happy. It really hurts or they are tired. You don't just stop because you have a day of being miserable, same as you don't quit a job or a relationship because you have a bad day/week. I absolutely agree that bf shouldn't be at the demise of the mental health of the mother, but there are periods of adjustment where the days aren't great.

Yes, your right, I have been there and done that twice. I perservered through mastitis (in both breasts twice, with my second baby it was before I'd even left the hospital), cracked nipples, thrush, bad attachment, breast refusal you name it. I am pro breastfeeding and to be perfectly honest a little bit against formula.

I was just trying to show some support to another mother in her decision without being judgemental or trying to force my own beliefs onto her.

I'm not really interested in having someone try to 'school' me on a forum.

Thats good because I am not interested in "schooling you." <img src='http://www.huggies.com.au/forum/public/style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/dry.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt='<_<' /> I am interested in showing support to a woman who is bf and struggling. comments like at the end of the day a happy mum feeding her baby formula is better than an unhappy mum feeding her baby breastmilk. is not conducive to bf support in the early days. It would make sense if you said it weeks down the track. I know you said if it doesn't work out, but just by putting it in there, it has a negative effect. Similar to if you are in the beginning of labour and someone says something like - don't worry, if the pain is too much we can give you a c/s. (not that I think people say that, but it is to illustrate the detrimental effect lighthearted "supportive" comments can have. It just perpetuates the cycle of people thinking bf must be relatively easy because if your not happy, you can change! Easy as that!
I'm not meaning to criticise you, just trying to point out the effects of the common comments we make. Happy baby, happy mummy is a bit of cop out in our society whenever it gets hard. (not directed at the op at all.)

I'm not meaning to criticise you.....but I AM!

The title of this thread was 'gave up on breastfeeding' not 'I'm thinking about giving up'. Perhaps I misunderstood the point of the post. Perhaps not.

I saw that many others had provided her with advice on things to help with breastfeeding should she change her mind and continue on, and as I had interpreted the post as a woman who had made up her mind to discontinue breastfeeding, I simply offered her some kind sentiments to reassure her that her decision was ok. Seemed to me that was all she was really after.

If you want to talk about the effect of our 'common' comments maybe you should consider how what you are saying may impact on someone.

Part of the reason people feel guilty about not breastfeeding their babies for whatever reason is because there is always someone willing to judge them or lecture them on what they should do, why they shouldn't give up etc.

Shhheeesh, knew there was a reason why I didn't really bother much with forums!

I'm not meaning to criticise you.....but I AM!

The title of this thread was 'gave up on breastfeeding' not 'I'm thinking about giving up'. Perhaps I misunderstood the point of the post. Perhaps not.

I saw that many others had provided her with advice on things to help with breastfeeding should she change her mind and continue on, and as I had interpreted the post as a woman who had made up her mind to discontinue breastfeeding, I simply offered her some kind sentiments to reassure her that her decision was ok. Seemed to me that was all she was really after.

If you want to talk about the effect of our 'common' comments maybe you should consider how what you are saying may impact on someone.

Part of the reason people feel guilty about not breastfeeding their babies for whatever reason is because there is always someone willing to judge them or lecture them on what they should do, why they shouldn't give up etc.i

Shhheeesh, knew there was a reason why I didn't really bother much with forums!

forums are about support as well as discussion. there is great info, interesting debate and everyone has something to offer! lots of women will read your bf experience and be inspired. don't give up on forums because i have challenged your comment. sad forums would be crap if everyone just went around patting each other on the back just so nobody was offended. there are 50,000 members here and people can read the forum without being a member. what people say can make a huge impact. i dont do personal attacks, i just want people to own their comments. people just recite the normal spiel without thinking about what that actually means. its nothing personal. smile
you should stay, there are some amazing women here. smile

if you rread the thread you will find people arent being judgemental, they arent saying she has to do it and they arent giving their opinion of formula. sure the title said giving up, but the post didnt reflect that. i told dh i was giving up on the weekend as i was tired of everything. had a few hours refusing to do anything and i felt totally different. saying i give up is usually just a realisation of something isnt right and it can be a cry for help. she didnt say i give up and have a post about ff. her post was about wanting to bf. wink

Hi ladies,

Thanx for the kind replies. I have decided to cont with the formula. My milk has come in and I'm hurting from being so full but my nipples are still pretty bad- stopped hurting but still scabby. Definately not what I had planned but all that matters to me is that my baby is healthy and thriving. Bf definately is easier in the sense that your not having to warm bottles in the middle of the night u have a supply that's instantly heated to the perfect temp and it's very portable lol. Pros and cons to everything!