New member/dad introduction bottlefeeding question

Hi huggies people,

Not sure if this is the place to do it, but i am a new dad so thought i'd just say hello.

Last wednesday my partner and i welcomed our first bub together into the world, a little 2980g girl we named Gabriella Rose that is a little sister to my partners 15 year old who also lives with us.

We were a little stressed given our ages, my partner is 41 this year and i'm not far behind her, but everything turned out perfectly. We're now enjoying our 3rd day at home all together which we can enjoy for the next couple of weeks while i'm on leave.

I'm very much a hands on dad and like to help out as much as i can, including feeding. We bought a philips avent electric breast pump in the lead up to the birth so i could be involved, and i'm currently doing the 2am feed while my partner gets some sleep and can recover from the birth as quickly as she can (she had a c section, and healing really well).

We've had so many conflicting pieces of advice from midwives about bottle feeding. Some seem to think it's the devil and make you feel horrible for even trying it, others say its a great tool when bub is really tired and hungry and may not suck as much as she should and get a decent feed. What are huggies peoples thoughts? She seems to be happy to go back to breast feeding when she wakes up in the morning.

Also when bottle feeding, she seems to absolutely smash down the milk haha. Is that ok, she gets the amount of milk in 10 minutes that would normally take nearly half an hour to give her. She burps ok post feed, but gets a little bit upset near the end of the feed from what i imagine is an upset tummy from eating too fast. This is in contrast to the contented demeanour she has when she's finished on the breast.

Should i maybe try and pace her a bit, by perhaps maybe taking the bottle way every 5ml or so to burp her? Probably a question for another part of the forum maybe.

Thanks

Hi there and welcome, wow it is so great to here that you are so helpful to your partner. If you are only expressing one feed it sounds fine with me it's not like you are giving her formula. Forumula would interfear with your wifes supply but like I already said I can't see one expressed feed hurting. Apparentley If you don't intruduce a bottle in the first 10 weeks babies may not take to it later on so it pays to have them trained for both! At the end of the day it is still breastmilk. And with the bottle make sure you have the smallest teat size you can get. What sought of bottles are you using? I have also heard of syringe feeding newborns but never actually tried it.

Congratulations on the birth of your daughter and it's great to see a hands-on dad.
You could try using a slower teat - they have different flows. But babies do feed quicker from bottles as they don't have to do any work. Maybe you could try using Calma - a teat made by medela. Babies have to create vacuum to drink from them and as soon as the baby stops to swallow and breathe - the flow stops - like with a real boob. They recommend not to use bottles until BF is established (which can take a few weeks) as it can create nipple confusion.

You will always get conflicting advice on whatever topic when it comes to babies!!!

You can get teats with smaller holes in it to slow the flow of the milk. I would probably stop bubs halfway through the feed and burp them (just like swapping breasts)...

Other than that, Welcome

PS - I would have loved a partner who would get up in the middle of the night!!! Still doesn't ever and DD is 16mths!

Hi and congratulations,

I'd agree that she sounds like she needs a slower teat. It's usually recommended to wait at least 6 weeks, until breastfeeding is well established, to introduce a bottle. Apparently because the bottle is easier for bub and the suck needed to feed is different, bub can end up with nipple confusion and start to refuse the breast. Plus babies only have tiny little tummies, she may be taking too much, too quickly.

It's entirely up to you, but I would probably do a little more research on the subject, especially if your wife is intending to breast feed long term. I know it's extremely tiring in the early days, but it will get better for her over time.

Good luck with everything. PP is right, you will get conflicting advice, lol. Take what works for you smile

Have only tried a tommee tippee closer to nature slow flow teat, we got a bunch of them with a microwave sterilizer (which we don't use as we've been told they aren't necessary but the bottles will come in handy.

Also have a couple of newborn teats that came with the avent pump, so might try that. Would love for her to slow down a bit, if only to prolong the dad time a bit. I might have a look around for the medela's cruxy, thanks.

So far the bottle hasn't seemed to have spoiled her breast feeding, latched on happily this morning for a 7am feed, still asleep now 3.5 hours later (and mum!, guess that's why i'm wasting time on the net). The first night my partner was trying to breast feed her at 2am and just got really frustrated, bub was so tired and wouldn't suck, then was just hungry and unsettled. Bottle has fixed that

kstock, we actually syringed fed early when she was still in hospital. Bub was very small and lost a lot of weight early, so they compensated her with formula feeds through the syringe to get her weight up. It worked, but the syringe did make her even more lazy than a bottle! You basically stuck your little finger in her mouth to stimulate the sucking, then injected formula into the side of her mouth. Going back on the boob after that took a bit of work as unlike the bottle she doesn't even have to create a vacuum.

Luckily we had an awesome midwife house visit and tell my partner to "stop piss farting around with the syringe feeding". Just give her the bottle and she'll be fine. Eased my partners fears a bit, felt bad giving her a bottle

So far so good

And can't understand why a dad wouldn't help out, who wants a grumpy tired partner!

Welcome!

People will always give you different advise. As we know, breastfeeding is best for baby. Babies feed every 2-3 hours in the first few weeks and then the nights tend to stretch out to about 5-6 hours in between each feed. The first few weeks are critical to your wife establishing a good milk supply for you bub. By bub feeding so often, this is bubs (and natures) way of increasing this milk supply. At this stage, I would advise against bottle feeding unless it is expressed milk because this too will help keep up your wife's milk supply. There are alot of things you can do to help. Do the dishes, cook dinner, and do the laundry. Take baby for walks to let you wife sleep as much as possible. By week 3 you both will be use to waking every few hours and then the day your baby sleeps for 8 hours straight, you will still wake up cos your use to it! Also, by giving baby a bottle, there are risks of the baby preferring the bottle and therefore not taking the nipple. Its important to give only the breast for at least a month. After this, you can give the occasional bottle (like once a day at random occasions) because this will allow you wife to go out for a much needed break and you can stay home with baby and feed yourself smile

I am a pro breastfeeding mother so of course will encourage your wife to preserver for at least 3 months. By this stage, breastfeeding will be so easy! You can take baby anywhere cos the milk is attached to your wifes chest! Awesome stuff! I am a firm believer that while formula does great things in keeping babies alive and healthy in the absence of breastmilk, breastmilk is still the best thing baby can have!

Good luck and if you want any help, or support, you can private message me anytime.

I wouldn't be giving expressed milk at all at this age... her tummy is tiny taking small amounts as little as 10-20mls at the breast and if you go giving her a expressed bottle of more than her tummy can take.

I am assuming your midwife is suggesting that you don't give expressed milk. Also having a c section it takes longer for your milk to come in and get estalished and you are actually decreasing the mums milk supply by feeding her a bottle.

Don't do it if you want to bond with your baby cuddle kiss change and bath her.... don't give her expressed breast milk until she is older. Many give expressed breast milk because baby won't latch or they are away from baby this is great for reasons to express.... not wanting to get up isn't a really good reason....

I have had three c sections i know its hard but for the first 6 weeks she needs to be on the breast only..... she will feed little and offen all the time. you can appreciate it is hard on mum at first but its better for baby.

Not something I would do in the early days as I like to take a few weeks to establich supply, as although she is expressing your wife is essentially missing that 2am feed in which her brain will eventually decide she doesn't need to produce....

Though I have also never had anyone offer to feed at 2am!!! Hubby leaves for work then, so in the early days he used to sit with me for 15 mins whilst I fed then go to work which was enough for me, as I found that YES i still had to do the feed but it still felt as though I had the support there with me, and he had no dramas bonding with our kids, he has done well, he is only home with them for 1.5 hrs a night but they all have had a wonderful relationship with him./.... our last one used to crawl to me to breastfeed then straight back over to daddy when she had finished roll eyes

Welcome!

At this stage, I would advise against bottle feeding unless it is expressed milk because this too will help keep up your wife's milk supply.

Yep she's not taking any formula, just the one small comfort feed of expressed breastmilk at 2am to settle her down. The only formula feeding we did was only for her first few days when she was losing weight.

I am assuming your midwife is suggesting that you don't give expressed milk.

Our current one is saying one late night feed of 20ml of expressed milk is fine, a couple of midwives at hospital were dead against it.

After a sleepless night trying to feed a tired baby the 2am bottle feed of expressed milk seems to have worked wonders. She's bright and happy this morning.

Thoughts on here seem to be similar to the thoughts of midwifes as a whole, conflicted.

I think we'll play it by ear, and if her breast feeding suffers we'll cut the bottle out.

Thanks for all the help.

Yep she's not taking any formula, just the one small comfort feed of expressed breastmilk at 2am to settle her down. The only formula feeding we did was only for her first few days when she was losing weight.




Our current one is saying one late night feed of 20ml of expressed milk is fine, a couple of midwives at hospital were dead against it.

After a sleepless night trying to feed a tired baby the 2am bottle feed of expressed milk seems to have worked wonders. She's bright and happy this morning.

Thoughts on here seem to be similar to the thoughts of midwifes as a whole, conflicted.

I think we'll play it by ear, and if her breast feeding suffers we'll cut the bottle out.

Thanks for all the help.

Good on you!!
The tired thing is just part and parcel of a new baby. I know its hard but it really does get easier and before you know it, you wife will just lift up her top and pop baby onto her nipple all without a break in conversation! smile I think i read that you bub is only a few days old? Just keep at it and remember that for the next few weeks, its 2-3 hour feeds round the clock but MAN is it worth it!!!!!!

To subzero, i just meant giving EBM is better than formula if they are going to do the bottle thing smile

My wife is breastfeeding triplets. Not so good at the start as they were all over the show but have had the odd botte of expressed milk like about 5 x each over 5 months.

Just get up with her or get her to feed in bed during the night. My wife will tandom feed two then the third. We have to do a list of who went where at what feed so they do a round robbin thing. So the same baby does not get the last feed every time. Breasts are interesting things really and can really make as much milk as you need.