If a woman goes into labour full of worry and fear do you think she would be more likely to have a negative experience, compared to a woman that is calm and relaxed?

I do believe the mind is very powerful but is it powerful enough to sway your experience of birth?

I am very interested to see what everyone thinks! smile

I told my midwife as soon as I turned up that at some point I wanted an epidural, only to be told no I cant have one as there is noone to do it. That made me so angry, frustrated, upset and scared and my labour was awful. If I were given a heads up prior (long story about epis at this particular hospital) I believe I would have been in a better state of mind and have had a better experience

yes i think so.

although throughout my whole pregnancy i was very calm, sure of myself and positive. but once labour hit me, i became terrified, out of control and scared. i didnt know what was happening to my body and the pain was beyond anything i had imagined. so i feel like i had had an unrealistic expectation of my ability to cope with the pain. and when i didnt cope, it all went out the window.

i had a very negative birth experience, despite a seemingly "normal" birth.

I do believe all that you said!

This is from my experience. I dont deal with pain very well, so whilst pregnant I did heaps of research on dealing with pain in labour. I wanted as little interventions as I could possibly manage, because the more interventions you have (I was mainly looking in terms of pain management, internals didnt worry me as I see them as necessary, but some mums dont) the more likely you are to have complications, such as episiotomy, caesarean labour etc.

So I got a hold of a few relaxation CDs (some secondhand) and books (look up Calmbirth, their book was fantastic) and listen and read them daily during the third trimester. I also drank Raspberry leaf tea from 32 weeks.

I had a fantastic labour. I stayed at home for as long as I could bear, when I got to the hospital I was 6cm! My waters hadnt broken so at 8cm they were broken for me (this is the one thing I do regret, I kind of wished I had of waited a little longer to see if they would break on their own, but I know why the doctor wanted them broken as my dilation had slowed right down).

Anyhow DD was born 1 hour after my waters were broken. I had a little bit of gas as that last hour was quite intense. I only needed 3 pushes to get her out, which the midwife said was great for a first time mum!

I did need stitches though, so that is something I want to work on for baby number 2. Although they healed well it was quite uncomfortable for the first couple of weeks. Had I not had the stitches I would have felt 110%!

So yes, I do believe mindset is a huge contributor in your birth experience, and with a positive mindset you can take control of your birth experience. I do understand that emergencies happen and complications can be out of our control and also believe in these circumstances the doctors would have my best interests at heart and will do what is best for me and my baby.

Go into labour thinking knowing it IS going to be PAINFUL - that is why it is called LABOUR and not rest! However it is what your body needs to do and have faith in your body!

If you have a birth centre near you try to deliver there. I didnt deliver at a birth centre (hoping on getting in for no.2) but even I had a great experience in a normal setting.

Good luck, I will stop ranting now, lol! If you have any more q's please PM me! smile

i read calmbirth, had relaxation cds and wanting an all natural birth myself smile

unfortunately all the techniques and things i had practices just flew out the window once i felt the pain.

next time around im going to approach it very differently. probably by asking for an epidural to be administered before i even get to a bed LOL

I'd have to go against the grain and say no. Not in my case anyway.

I went into my first labour thinking it wouldn't be that bad and that everything would run smoothly. I'm a fairly relaxed and calm person in general and I've always dealt with pain very well. I had a background in natural medicine and I was confident that I would soar through labour in a rhythmic breeze.

BAH! I was remained in control for the first 12 hours but the following 24 hours (yes, that's right) of contractions that came on top of each other had me dropping in and out of consciousness, my body went into shock and I began seizing and required an emergency c-section.

I still remained positive throughout it all. So, no. I don't think my mindset played a part and, if it did, I'd hate to think how things would've panned out if I had a negative attitude LOL!

ETA: I think the important thing is to go in with an open mind. Don't expect it to be glorious or magical or even traumatic! I went in thinking I'd handle it all beautifully, which I suppose I did, but all the positive thinking in the world isn't going to give you the exact birth you want. Some things are just out of your hands.

I never expected that I'd have an emergency c-section. I never expected that my son would be born at 37 weeks weighing 9lb 4oz with shoulders like an NRL player! It sure wasn't the birth I expected but, it was still perfect and I wouldn't change a thing smile

I think to some extent it might but I've had a few women tell me before they give birth that they are not going to use drugs, it is a natural and wonderful thing blah blah blah only to end up begging for an epidural when the day comes.

No for me, I guess it would have a little bit to do on one that has no complications, If you go in all stressed its going to be ALOT harder t relax to cope with the contractions.

I was excited for mine couldnt wait it. It didnt even cross my mind I would have a bad experience but It was HELL.

Being positive would absolutely help it wont change a baby getting stressed or your body doing things it shouldn't but it will help you if things go normally for your body. I wasnt scared, at all, and i hate pain!!! I didnt swear i remained calm, I sat backwards on a chair most of the time as she was the wrong way around so was trying to get her to turn and the other times i layed down but i wasnt scared i was excited. I knew it was the best pain in the world because of the outcome smile I was positive like this for 39 hours before my precious girl went into foetal distress and i had to have an emergency caesarean but i mean if i had of been scared i cant imagine what the 39 hours would of been like!

For me, mindset was definitely a factor in how good my labours were.

DS1 - absolutely no idea what to expect but didn't believe it was as painful as everybody was making out as otherwise why would they have more than 1 child lol. I had a great labour, still had a shot of pethidine and a second degree tear but really enjoyed my experience.

DS2 - felt like I'd be fine as I'd coped with number 1 ok. Then they brought out the dreaded drip - once I saw that it was all over red rover, I went to pieces as I knew that the drip caused pain (thanks to my mother for sharing her experiences with 2 inductions) and therefore, it caused pain. Add to that he was posterior, I had a drip, oxygen, foetal monitors around my belly and up my vjj and gas like there was no tomorrow. I also had a PPH. But I felt like I had not prepared myself mentally for if things went wrong - I had a vision of how my labour would go and as soon as it didn't, I fell apart.

DD(#3) - went into it completely relaxed and open minded. I armed myself with knowledge, what I could do to help labour, what were my rights and what could I demand if I needed a monitor (still to be able to walk) and the only outcome that mattered was a healthy baby - any complications just meant that I had to shift my vision. As it happened I had a drug free labour that didn't get much more painful than hard period cramps. To me, positive thinking was key in my experience. I went out on a high, it could not get any better.

Georgie if you're concerned, I think one of the best ways to prepare is to read, and watch videos of births so you know what to expect and you understand what your body is doing, and what you can do to help it. I know your DH is very supportive, get him involved and make sure he is with you every step - I found that having my DH right there and touching me the whole time was very important. You may not want him to touch you but his presence may help you feel more secure. It's a truly amazing experience you won't forget and you'll tell the story many times in your life, so treasure it, no matter what it is grin

For sure a persons mind set can be an amazing tool.

I use to work in a long term rehab unit for people who have had strokes and other brain injuries and hip and knee replacements.

We had one patient come to us after a stroke with a very poor prognosis, the doctor's told him he would never walk again, never hold a spoon and so many other things we take for granted every day, but this patient refused to believe it and with sheer will and hard work I watch that man on the day of his discharge walk out the front door to go home.

Where as we had another young patient with a small child who had always played sick and no one believed she was sick and then was diagnosed with a spinal tumor, the tumor had been removed and she had a really good prognosis, but she choose the mind set of woe me and to this day she still can not walk.

I had to beautiful labours and births I can't wait to do it again

We had one patient come to us after a stroke with a very poor prognosis, the doctor's told him he would never walk again, never hold a spoon and so many other things we take for granted every day, but this patient refused to believe it and with sheer will and hard work I watch that man on the day of his discharge walk out the front door to go home.

Wow, that is truly amazing! That must have been a rewarding job. I do feel for the little girl though sad

Meagan at the moment I am feeling very positive and excited about the whole labour thing (my reply when I am 35 weeks may be differant laugh) I have a very realistice expectation of labour but it is still a positive one and I do hope it stays like that.

I was taking to Rachels mummy about my previous experiance with gall stones and when I look back on it I did cope pritty well but after about 12 hours of crippling pain I didnt say no to morphine grin

Yes, my labour was quick and I was ready to push in 35 minutes and I lost control and just freaked out. I wanted it drug free and of course I had no choice because of the speed but I got scared and just screamed which was not good for labour.

I hope next time I will be prepared for a short labour and still be able to be in control.

I wasn't worried, frightened etc with my first.
DD1 was still high and posterior, I stopped dilating at 8cm after 5hrs and continued labouring for another 8hrs with no improvement. Her heart rate started dropping and I ended up with an emergency c-section.
In saying that, I still feel I had a positive experience.

So, I guess the fact I was calm and relaxed helped me get through it ok.
I had many reasons to lose the plot or cry but didn't for some reason. I don't know why I was ok during it all. It was obviously my first time and nothing went to plan but sometimes you just have to roll with the punches smile

My birth experience with DD was a lot better than I'd expected and I think a lot of that came down to a change in my mindset about labour in the last month or two of my pregnancy. I'm just hoping that my mindset about labour works as well for this one smile.

I have little to no pain threashold in normal day-to-day experiences (I'm a whimp lol). Right up until I went to my birthing classes I had the mindset of "I want drugs as soon as things happen and I want lots of them", an epidural was basically going to be my first port of call smile. When I did my birthing classes though I started to think about it a lot more and changed my attitude to "I want to see how things are going" and "an epidural will be my last port of call, its still an option but I'll try other things first". It did help that I'm unable/unwilling to use pethadine to manage labour pain as everyone in DH's family is allergic to it so I'm not willing to chance finding out that bub is allergic to it too while in labour. This means that I'm limited to gas and an epidural as my medical pain relief.

I managed my labour pain using non medical methods for the first 4hrs or so and then used gas (although didn't even use that properly as it was a premixed cannister and was too strong for me to use in the 'traditional' way lol). I had a fantastically supportive husband and midwife too which obviously helped a lot as they encouraged me to give the non medical pain relief a chance to work etc. I was also very fortunate to have a quick labour with DD - 5hrs 55min from first contraction to delivery. I actually tore in 4 places but didn't even realise that until they told me I needed stitches and even then I thought they meant I needed 4 stitches!! DH had to tell me (3 days later) that it had been lots of stitches in 4 different locations lol.

Everyone who knew me (work collegues and especially my immediate family) were astonished when they heard that I hadn't used anything more than gas but it gave me such a feeling of achievment to have managed my labour the way I did, purely because until a few weeks before my expectations had been so different. If labour had been longer etc I may have ended up with an epi, who knows, but with DD my change in attitude towards labour in those last few weeks meant that I had a birthing experience that I'm really grateful for.

Leisa.

Leisa good on you! It sounds like you had a pritty good labour and I hope your next one will be even better! Good luck smile

I think it effected my labour with DD as i didn't know much and went with it just went with the flow. I did get emotional the contractions hurt like hell but i did have the drip so they came hard and fast. Overall i has a great experience though and drugs helped alot.

yes i think so.

although throughout my whole pregnancy i was very calm, sure of myself and positive. but once labour hit me, i became terrified, out of control and scared. i didnt know what was happening to my body and the pain was beyond anything i had imagined. so i feel like i had had an unrealistic expectation of my ability to cope with the pain. and when i didnt cope, it all went out the window.

i had a very negative birth experience, despite a seemingly "normal" birth.

uh oh this sounds EXACTLY like me...

I am not concerned about the birth at all but does that make me naive or relaxed???

Yeah i do when i was in labour i set my self a time til he was born i was induced at 3.30pm and i told myself he would be born around 9pm anyway i ended up having him at 8.50pm.
meanwhile the girl next told me she was going really well in labour and then she heard another lady next door scream and she did not mentally want to go through it so her body stopped having contractions which is pretty wierd when they were coming regularly and they suddenly stopped.

If you ever want to get together for a coffee some time I'm more than happy to share smile

I had worked out what I wanted to happen if it all went pear shaped but went into it going with the flow. Who are you going through for your antenatal classes? we went through the parents centre and the brain chmical part was explained pretty well.

If a woman goes into labour full of worry and fear do you think she would be more likely to have a negative experience, compared to a woman that is calm and relaxed?

I do believe the mind is very powerful but is it powerful enough to sway your experience of birth?

I am very interested to see what everyone thinks! smile

Absolutely! I think the mind plays a huge roll in a lot of things! It all comes down to the type of person you are.

Absolutely! I think the mind plays a huge roll in a lot of things! It all comes down to the type of person you are.

Yep i agree 100%

If a woman goes into labour full of worry and fear do you think she would be more likely to have a negative experience, compared to a woman that is calm and relaxed?

I do believe the mind is very powerful but is it powerful enough to sway your experience of birth?

I am very interested to see what everyone thinks! smile

definately I have friend who was so scared/ nervous that the midwives called her anxious Anne ( anne being her name).She said she thought she was going to be a stastisc( sp - forget the word) and she would die in child birth.Her labour was prolonged because of her mindset.I had a very long 1st labour but through it all I was not stressed just went with the flow

Yes i do. i also think it has alot to do with the type of person you really are. I didn’t read books or watch videos to prepare myself. I knew that I would just deal with it when it happens, good or bad, and trust the experts. Wasn’t the most fun I had in my life, but I dealt with it. I took what I learnt and applied it to my second labour, which was much more pleasant smile.

I think it definitely does. With DD1 I went in with an open mind but ended up being a bit scared of the pain. I still had a pretty good labour. 8 hours but a lot of pushing. With DD2 I knew what to expect and had a great labour that was quite fast.

The mind plays a huge part in labour and birth. Even going into labour in the first place. If you think about it from a physiological aspect - if you are tense / scared / stressed - your muscles tense up. This includes the muscles that are used in birth. They will not be as effective if tensed then if they are relaxed. Even pain wise - it hurts less if you can relax through it, although this can be extremely difficult to achieve!!

Its not as simple as if I am calm, my birth will be easy. Its more likely that if you have a positive calm mindset - your birth will be easier then if you go in with a negative mindset. You are much more likely to have difficulty if stressed. Many womens contractions slow or stop once they get to hospital due to the stress of travel/new place/fear of actually having a baby. There are also countless stories of women being in labour for hours and its not until they do some mental processing that they actually have the baby within minutes once they let go of a certain issue. (eg losing a baby in a previous birth = fear of losing this one)

I sure do,

Through out my first pregnancy I tryed really hard not to imagine what is was going to be like because I figured I'd probably get it wrong and I never listened to other peoples horror stories because everyone is different, I just read alot of books so I could understand what was happening to by body and the rest was just an experience, I hated the pain and got an epi not that that worked for long but the best thing I had was that my midwife taught me some great was of breathing and it was algood.

Leisa good on you! It sounds like you had a pritty good labour and I hope your next one will be even better! Good luck smile

Thanks. Interestingly enough I actually went into labour later that day smile

My labour with DS was very intense but I'm still really happy with how I coped with everything. It took me about 1/2 an hour for me to even register that I was having contractions - it was the third tightening that had me starting to consider that they might be contractions. After an hour of tightenings (6-7 contractions) I called the hospital just to ask if they thought I was in labour based on what I was feeling. They said it certainly sounded like it but that I should stay home until I was getting 3 contractions in 10 minutes (at that point it was about 1 every 10 min and I was still questioning whether the tightenings were contractions or not).

DH took DD to our friend's place and the contractions got more intense so I jumped in the shower to use water for pain relief. By the time DH got back (he took longer than I'd expected because he needed to put fuel in the car, I'd forgotten to do it that morning oops) I needed to go to the hospital as I was having contractions every 2-3minutes and we live 15-20 min away from the hospital. Got to the hospital at about 8:45pm and after a quick lot of obs got into the bath and tried to use the same techniques as with DD (music, dim lights, backrubs and the water) but found that things were happening really fast so was asking for the gas pretty quickly.

At 9:15ish they did an internal and said that I was 6cm dilated but bub wasn't engaged yet. A little while later I started to feel the need to push so had to get out of the bath but they set up a new type of birthing chair that they'd just received that morning (I was the first person to use one) which I was able to use in the shower so that I had the water running down my back still. I had a few contractions on that where they could see the membranes bulging then there was a pop as my waters broke. The next contraction had his head delivered then I had to try not to push as they needed to cut the cord before I could do anything else - it was around his neck too tightly and they couldn't manipulate it over his head. Once the cord was cut the next contraction saw him delivered and on my chest at 10:05pm. I LOVED the birth chair this time round as it meant that I could continue using the water right the way through my labour (last time I'd done the pushing part on the bed).

All in all a very intense labour, but still one that I'm really happy with how I coped/managed things. Then again, at only 3hr 35 min from first contraction to delivery (and an hour of that was spent questioning whether it was even labour lol), an intense labour isn't that much of a surprise smile.

Leisa.

Hmmm... I'm not too sure about this one.
With DD I felt super prepared - I had read up heaps, I had a three page birth plan (LMAO) and I was all set to get in there and do it with no pain relief...
Well I got induced and endured a lot of pain and discomfort for about 8 or so hours and then I asked for a c-section just to get it over with! lol
Well of course they didn't agree to that particular request so suggested I tried some pain relief - had a suck of the gas, no help at all, so I plunged into the deep end and asked for an epidural (I was pretty dead set against using pethidine or epi before this).

Once the epidural was working, I was a different person: laughing, joking, happy and relaxed because I wasn't experiencing the pain... About an hour and a bit after the epi, DD arrived with a couple of pushes. I had slight grazing and they gave me two stitches.

With DS I was also induced but went in there and asked for an epidural pretty soon after serious contractions began. That was a much nicer experience. Again, a couple of pushes and he was out. No grazing or anything at all.

With DD2 I finally went into a spontaneous natural labour! I was really excited about it because it was all new.. I felt quite calm about it all, although slightly anxious coz I didn't know what to expect.. Asked for epidural as soon as I got to hospital. Had two failed attempts (each time he tried to get it in at least half a dozen times..)
After that I got scared - coz I was doubtful of how I would go without serious pain relief.. Plus I was in some intense pain because she was posterior (tho we didn't know that til her head came out).
Tried gas which helped a tad, then they offered me a lovely new drug only because of the failed epis. It was a morphine based one and it really helped take the edge off.
I used that and gas til the end. Pushed out my biggest and only posterior baby with only the residue pain relief!!! It was uncomfortable and not really that much fun, but in a sense I am glad I did it..

So I dunno.. I think maybe DS's birth was the easiest/best in that I kinda had more of an idea of what to expect and I had a good epidural early on..

My advice is to read as much as you can (I read a book called Birth, which I found quite good) and to truly go in there with an open mind. Don't expect to have pain relief straight away, but also don't shy away from asking for it if you need it.

You'll be fine!!!
(ok I'll stop now, sorry about the novel smile )

I think a positive mindset definitely will help.

I was so scared and freaking out when the doctor broke my water that I stopped dilating and after 24hrs they induced me and by then my baby was in distress - I had to have a ceasarian.

To this day, I can remember how scared I was and really think that if i was calmer and let things happen I would have been able to have a better labour experience.