Children's social behaviour

It is a big worry of mine. I had some bad experiences growing up and I hate to think of my children going through the same thing. Luckily DS1 seems to have a lot of friends, which sometimes suprises me because he is so bossy and it always suprises me that other kids would put up with it wink

In regards to keeping them back from starting school because of it, I wouldn't necessarily see that as a good idea. Social interaction is just one part of school and if they are just a shy child, holding them back isn't necessarily likely to change that about them. Also as soon as I saw your question I was reminded of my nieces who are twins. One is very bubbly and outgoing and the other is very much a loner (I remember her at about age four separating herself from the other children at a party and going to eat her cake by herself in the garden behind a tree). However the twin that isn't as social is a lot more academically inclined then her twin and is thriving at school. She doesn't have quite as many friends but she still has some and she is perfectly happy.

If you are still worried about the social side of things, you could always look into other activities for her that allow her to socialise with other children and if it's something she's interested in it will be much better for helping to build her confidence and social skills then keeping her in a setting which may not be working for her anyway.

Usually children are held back from starting school if they have not mastered a number of key abilities- from social behavior to learning things, such as singing along with a well known nursery rhyme, communicating clearly and following instructions. Ask your childcare provider for a list of what skills your child should master, compared to what they have, and then hop back on the Huggies forum to let us know the specific reasons your childcare provider gave- it could just be that your little one has one or two things to catch up on and we can all help out with ways to get things rolling for you both.
If your child has been identified as having learning problems, be sure to have a vision and hearing check as often this helps uncover the real reason behind some difficulties. Let us know how things go!

Hi all
I am a mother of 2 boys and expecting my third in 5 weeks. She will be a september baby so she will go to school the year she is meant to and so will Angus, he will be one of the oldest as his birthday is 4th May which I am quiet happy about. My second son however is a feb baby he is only one now but I will most likely hold him back a year and start him the year after as an older one rather then one of the youngest.

this has nothing to do about his capabilities as I am sure he would do just fine, but it's just better I personally think to make sure he is ready emotionally. I am a teacher and since I have taken family leave I have done some CRT work in different primary schools, and some of the younger kids I have meet through doing this are not emotionally ready to learn yet in that context. I personally think waiting a an extra year to send your child to school will not hurt them at all, however sending them before they are really ready can impact their learning throughout their schooling years.

I say if there going to one of the youngest and your not sure if you should send them or not, I would personally hold them back an extra year, it's not uncommon at all.

Please! Dont keep your child back just because some childcare worker thinks your child may not be developing at the same rate as the other children. I am an early childhood educator, and I see this all the time. I have only came to work in child care in rescent years, but before I did my studies I held my son back from his first year in prep because he was so much smaller than all the other children, and he was one of those children who was off with the fairies most of the time at his daycare, And his childcare provider informed me at the time that he would benifit more from have more to to develop socially before sending him to school. BIG MISTAKE!
I kept him in childcare another year and he was so bored and lonley without his old friends who went off to big school without him. Being in childcare didnt benefit him socially at all, it wasn't until he finally went to school he bloomed. He was the most happy and social kid I have ever seen. He is 10 now, and in grade 4 but everytime someone ask's him what grade he is in, He replies " I'm in grade four but I should be in Grade five, Mum held me back". It hurts me every time I hear it because deep down I know he was ready I was just holding him back to keep his carers happy..
Let your child grow at there own pace, and trust that they will be able handle themselves in all future social settings, with just your support, kind word and wisdom. Early childhood eductors dont always know whats best.

My boy was 5 in feb. He just missed the cut off for my area, but I sent him to three year old kindy anyway. His teacher recommended doing two years for his social development. I'm glad I did. I know he would survive, and do 'ok'. But I don't want him to just be 'ok', I want him to thrive and feel very comfortable. I think he is ready this last half of four year old kinder to go to school. But I have just been doing extra physical and mental activities, excursions, letting him take on more responsibility whilst teaching around the home, etc... to get him by these last two terms.
Also I spoke to parents and children who had been held back at later stages of their education, and they said it was waaaaay more socially debilitating then. They would have preferred to have it done when they couldn't remember.
Good luck with your choice.

my husband is a high school teacher and sees them at the other end where many who started at or near the cut off are still very immature in senior high school.Our eldest was born in may and we"held him back".One of the reasons being that we thought it is better being one of the oldest not the youngest in senior high school.He is a bright boy and could have easily started at 4 but we were thinking long term.It is much easier when the birthdays are later in the year

hi

smile

My son's birthday is in March and he will be going to school when he is 4, turning 5. I can't see the point in keeping him at home for another year. He thrives in daycare and if he struggles at primary school we will address it early and get help if he needs it. I don't see how having him stay home with a parent (alone except for his baby sister/brother - due in 2 weeks), can help him develop any social, emotional or academic skills.
I am a secondary school teacher and I find the kids who are held back fit into 2 categories: ones that are too mature and simply don't click with their peers because they think 'older', or have beahviour issues be it naughty or lacking social skills.
I have friends who are going to keep their girls (both March babies) back for a whole extra year. They will be physically bigger than everyone else, and later on they will mature sooner.
You have to think about how old you child will be when they finish primary and secondary school.
Parents keeping their children back for that extra year for no real reason are pushing up the average age of all students, not what the curriculum intends to cater for.