i had to find out

so this is what happend Dp told me a while ago that his ex's baby could be his which i later found out wasnt but ppl still thought her baby looked like my partner so after hearing that i organised to meet his ex and see for myself. i was veryy paranoid it was

When i did see her i realised her daughter didnt look like my partner at all. which is good
The only problem i have now is he had no idea i saw her cause i knew he would go off so befor i could explain to him proporlyy why i saw her he went thru my phone and read the msg i sent to a friend about it.

He got p!$$3d off and asked why i didnt tell him that day and because that night i was going to tell him DS was in hospital i didnt think it was the right time to talk about it and then last night he didnt go to bed and i was going to discuss it then with him

I dont know if hes mor annoyed cause i didnt tell him or because i saw her i have good reason for both nut he isnt talking to me now

the resaon for me seing her was to get it out of my head that her daughter is his so im not constantly thinking about it
and the reason i didnt tell him straight away is because DS was in hospital and i was not going to talk about that while he was sic in hospital

sorry about the long story
Do you think i did the right thing ? And how can i make him understand why i did what i did ?

i know looking wouldnt determine but i also just wanted to get it out of my head aswell and seeing her daughter with red hair curly hair and not looking like dp at all made me feel better it wasnt him i didnt trust it was her as she was maried when she slept with him and he was with me DS is 7 weeks old and is like a mini version of his dad i just wanted to get it out of my head been thinking about it for over a year now

i completley understand why hed be mad but its not like i was off seing other males i saw his ex as a 1 of thing to give myself piece of mind

i completley understand why hed be mad but its not like i was off seing other males i saw his ex as a 1 of thing to give myself piece of mind

well mad for not telling him anyway

I dnt think you did anything wrong as its his fault you feel like this you needed closure for yourself and seeing the baby is how you wanted to get closure for yourself.
He has to suck it up hun he shouldn't be the one all sooky you should be the one all angry!!
His put you in the position and he has to deal with it hun xx
If he has a go at you turn around and say if you never cheated I wouldn't need to see things for myself!!
Chin up Hun
They both need a clip over the ear wink

I don't think you did anything wrong but you have to see it from his point of view. It bad enough that everyone talking about it then you go & check the baby out & he may feel like even you don't trust him.

I would probably tell him that you where sick of people telling you & you had to see for yourself.

Don't blame yourself, it hurtful that people can talk & they don't seem to care that you and your son are getting hurt by this gossip.

Plus i agree that you need closure about this & you don't need anymore stress.

i know looking wouldnt determine but i also just wanted to get it out of my head aswell and seeing her daughter with red hair curly hair and not looking like dp at all made me feel better it wasnt him i didnt trust it was her as she was maried when she slept with him and he was with me DS is 7 weeks old and is like a mini version of his dad i just wanted to get it out of my head been thinking about it for over a year now

I understand why you did what you did, but at the end of the day the only way you will be 100% sure is through a DNA test, our DS has red hair and neither myself or DF do, even our two daughters don't. Just give him some time to think about it and try and talk to him about it again, and then see what happens, at the end of the day though he was the one that put you in this tough position so he needs to take some ownership over that.