OTT Grandparents

My DH and I are normal, middle class people living in a suburb outside of Perth with our beautiful little DD.
My parents are quite wealthy and love to spoil DD which is fine at the moment as she is their first grandchild and still under a year old. My parents often go overseas for holidays and come home with suitcases full of gifts including Chanel, Gucci and other expensive designer brand clothes and accessories for her. I have just had a talk with them and said that although I am very grateful for the gifts to DD I would appreciate if they cut back and no longer bought home anything that has a designer label on it as she starts to get older.

Am I being unreasonable?

If they still want to buy her things then that is fine. I understand Grandparents like to spoil their grandchildren but I really dont think its appropriate for her to be wearing such expensive clothes at such a young age. If we were rich celebrities living in Paris then maybe, but we arent and we dont.
I also dont want my daughter growing up thinking money is everything. I also know how bitchy girls can be, and I dont want my daughter thinking she is better then others because she wears designer clothes.
What do others think? Should I just get over it and just let them spoil her like that or should I make a stand and say NO i dont want her walking to our local shops wearing a chanel dress and expensive shoes? My mum just recently commented on getting her a Gucci childs bag :-/ WHAT IS THE POINT????? Shes not even 1 lol
I am happy with Kmart and Target and if in the future when she is alot older may be she can have a couple of special items of clothing

I forgot to mention that me asking them to stop caused quite an argument and they think I am being unreasonable and crazy :-/

Maybe just ask the to buy her one or two good outfits and suggest putting the extra money into a college fund for her instead, as it would be much more beneficial for her and spending that much money on that many outfits is just a waste and she doesn't get the chance to wear them all.

Maybe gradually over time she will stop buying them by the time your DD is really old enought to realise how expensive they are. Quite often kids actually like the $25 Target dress better than the $100 brand name as it is more sparkly etc.

No you are not being unreasonable. This is your child and your request on how you want her raised. I have the same views on consumerism, and don't want to raise an overly indulged, expectant, ungrateful child. My ex-husband and in-laws are wealthy and buying everything for them. Causing quite a lot of grief for me as I can't take my 5 & 3 yo to a toy store, or even food shopping without a meltdown as I won't buy them anything. Stick to your guns, it's your child. Also agree with PP about the bank account/college fun.

Its nice to know we are not the only ones that have parents that spoil their grandkids far too much.

We go through exactly the same every year grandparents go overseas and our kids end up with suitcases of designer clothes, Harrods memerabilia, Paddington bears....the list is endless.

To be honest, I don't say a word about it, if they want to spend their money on clothes that don't even look like they are more than $10 but are really worth hundreds well so be it. My kids are always spoilt by their grandparents esp during xmas, birthdays etc but they know not to expect the same treatment from their parents. You could probably instil the same thinking to your daughter now that she is still young. Sometimes its just not worth the argument!

I agree with the others that have written about an education fund instead and agree that it's your child - it would be nice if family and friends respected ALL your parenting decisions. If you have the conversation and they still buy the expensive clothes - I say sell them on e-bay, and put the money you make in an education fund. A) you'll collect the money for her education and cool maybe they'll eventually notice that your daughter doesn't wear the clothes! I'd also suggest to them that if they want to shpw how much they love their grandaughter to maybe spend some quality time with her instead eg take her to the zoo or something that she can enjoy????

Thanks for all the replies smile

I know she is only 1 and therefore doesn't know but I would still like to start teaching her early on that money isn't everything, and what a person wears doesn't dictate the way they are.
It doesn't matter to me that I wear Target and she wears designer clothes, that's not the issue. I am happy for them to spoil her (as most grandparents do) but they need to do it in a way that I agree with. I have already started up a bank account for her so that any money given to us goes into that and I will give it to her at either a significant birthday or the day she moves out of home or gets married. But unfortunately the parents don't agree and no longer give money as they want to do it their way which is buying expensive clothes that she grows out of within a month nearly!

I like the education fund idea also, I might run that past them.

I have also suggested many times that quality time to a child is more important and they can buy her everything under the sun, but it'll be the days we sat in the park having a picnic and slid down the slide that she will remember most. Plus its more fun playing then to given clothes. What kid wants clothes as a present??? Lol

I was also going to suggest college fund or bank account for her. Only other thing I would suggest is maybe say you would like them to get her something that she could have to remind her of them for years to come. If they go overseas why not suggest they get her one doll dressed in the national dress of each country they visit. My Father often worked overseas and I always got a doll from him or other relatives (not big ones about barbie size) I kept them on display until my teens and even used them for class projects about other cultures at school. It would give them a chance to get her something and something she could cherish.

I dont see what the big deal is. Labels scmabels, if you raise your child as you wish then a few gifts from the grandies wont be a big deal. Your child will just enjoy them more as they arent the norm.

I get both sides. In the end is it worth an argument with your obviously very loving parents over money. I LOVE dressing my DD in whatever her grandparents buy her - labels included. If she has wealthy grandparents she will cop it when she is much older anyway. Its jealousy. If your DD is gorgeous people will be jealous of that too, or if she is particularly bright - what can you do?. They've worked hard to have that money, let them spend it how it makes them happy - be grateful its on your kid - could be worse. If you really don't want it - sell it and make the money to put in her bank account. Otherwise you can make a memory quilt in years to come out of all those special outfits - a nice way to remember those special grandparents - you can even have their pic put on fabric to add to the quilt. Good luck and remember its done out of love.