Baby Blues
There was a story recently on the forum about Post Natal Depression which really captured my heart.
The story involved a young mother who had left her 3 week old baby with a neighbour (Huggies Forum member KeonesMummy). They had spoken only a few times, so KeonesMummy found her request a bit odd, but she agreed as the young mum clearly had no one else to turn to. When several hours later the lady had not returned for her child, KeonesMummy called the police. They eventually found her and it turned out that she was suffering from severe PND. Throughout it all KeonesMummy showed the most amazing sensitivity and compassion towards this new mum.
It got me to thinking about PND and wondering how desperate and isolated must a new mother be feeling to leave her child with a total stranger? Is there really is enough support and awareness for both PND? What are the signs? Can you do more to help if you think someone you know might be suffering from it?
Certainly from talking to my friends who have suffered from PND isolation does seem to be part of PND. Waking up exhausted and spending most of your day without adult company is compound by the hormonal changes that can trigger feelings of desperation and depression. To make things worse, on the rare occasions where you do get to catch up with your friends, everyone seems to be coping better than you are – and you feel even worse than before.
Often guilt and disappointment are part of depression. Maybe you feel bad because you don’t think you love your baby as much as you feel you should. Or you thought being a mum would be wonderful – and it just isn’t. Everyone has different reasons that make them feel that they are not coping in the role of new mum. That’s why I guess the most important thing to do is to talk to others and to realise that it is actually really common to feel this way.
If you think you may be suffering from PND taking the first step is often the hardest. Your GP or local child health nurse will be a great starting point.
Also many of the mums on the Huggies forum have suffered from PND so if you have the slightest inkling you may be suffering from PND, the forum is a great place to ask for help and advice. There is a Post Natal Support Group discussion within the Huggies Forum – it’s a great place to talk to other mums.
These organisations will also be able to provide you with more information and support.
Have you had PND or do you think you might be suffering from it? How did you cope? I’d love to hear your stories and help other mums to share their experiences.
7 Member comments Post a reply
A recent story got Mel wondering if there is enough support for Post Natal Depression
Read the full blog post: Baby Blues
Posted 07 March 2011 - 07:26 AM
I think the story shows that there isnt enough support. I know many mothers who have been diagnosed with PND and they are so embarrassed to admit it and feel humiliated about it. You see more help and support for pro-breastfeeding than anything else. And people wonder why people with PND are embarrassed?
Posted 07 March 2011 - 07:39 AM
You're excatly right! When DD2 was 4wks old, I went to my MCHN and said that I didn't feel myself (I didn't want to do anything/go anywhere, I was constantly in tears, I felt absolutely exhausted, I loved my baby and kids - but felt I didn't want to be a mum anymore), it was such a hard thing to do - she gave me the little quiz thing they give to all mums when their babies are 6wks old, and I only just passed. She said I was 2 points off having PND, and to keep on eye on it, if I noticed it getting worse I had to go to my gp. Of course I didn't go to my gp, and thought I was getting better - but looking back, I know I "cheated" on that quiz, I knew what answers would give me a bad score and so didn't make it as bad as it was. Why did I do this? Because I didn't want to believe I could have PND, I didn't want to be seen as a "failure" - luckily, I pulled through, and am only just starting to feel better, my daughter is one in a weeks time. I wish I had of gone to see my gp, and I'm hoping if any of these feelings I had, return again, I will get myself off to the gp ASAP.
Sorry for the novel, hope it made some sense!
Posted 07 March 2011 - 07:56 AM
I remember the isolation when I had my first child. My friends were working, my mum didn't live close by and I felt like I was the only one who felt the way I did. Thankfully I have a very supportive partner and the fog finally lifted. I didn't get help because I thought I was okay but in reality I wasn't. I'm now a volunteer counsellor at PANDA (post and antenatal depression association). I urge anyone across Australia who's feeling overwhelmed, isolated, anxious, upset, sad, etc to call us on 1300 726 306 between 9am and 7pm Monday to Fridays. We're there for anyone and we're a follow up service, so we continue to stay in touch until such time as you're linked in with services (which we can help you with) or you're feeling better. My kids are now in primary school and all is well. You do not have to go through this alone.
Posted 07 March 2011 - 09:39 AM
I know many mothers who have been diagnosed with PND and they are so embarrassed to admit it and feel humiliated about it. After birth, your body changes rapidly. Your hormone levels drop, your milk comes in and your breasts may become engorged, and you may feel exhausted. These physical realities can bring on the baby blues. Emotional factors also contribute to the blues. You may feel anxious about your baby's well-being, your transition to motherhood, or adjusting to your new routine. Your new responsibilities can feel overwhelming.
Posted 17 March 2011 - 02:27 AM
they feel embarrassed because it's a failure. Everyone talks about how wonderful motherhood is, yes it's a struggle, but most parents talk about the wonderful moments, how awesome it is, how much they love being around your kids. When you don't want to be around your child, when you don't feel you love them the way that you're supposed to, of course you'll feel embarrassed and not want to scream it to the world.
Posted 21 March 2011 - 08:52 PM
Books and peer support can be useful throughout pregnancy and after childbirth. Interacting with other moms allows you to share your experience and keep engaged in life outside of baby's arrival. Playgroups, mom's activities and events sponsored in local communities are available to those who are interested.
Posted 13 May 2011 - 11:56 PM
Follow the discussion on the forum.
You need to confirm your account to comment.