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am i being selfish? Rss

we are trying to decide to pick Godparents for our ten months old baby but can't compromise.
with our older son we picked my husbands brother and his wife ( with whom i'm very close with) and my sister.
this time he wants his younger sister and his older sister as well which i'm not very close to. i would prefer my sister and his younger one, so we have one of each on both sides but he feels that his older sister would be left out and sad.
she is not that close to my son the way my sister is,am i really selfish or should i let him have his way?
also is anyone married to a partner with a different religion?
my husband is catholic and i am orthodox
how do you deal with different religion when it comes to kids?

mother of two vic

Joshdan
My husband and I are of different religions, he's Catholic and I'm Church of England. As neither of us is overly religious my son was christened Catholic as his family cared more what religion he would be.
With regards to Godparents, I don't think you're being selfish. If neither you're son or you are close to his elder sister it seems he's only doing it to please his family. In my opinion thats not really the best way to pick godparents. Pick someone who will be around plenty to watch your son grow, and will be able to guide them in life. We made our decision based on if something was to happen to both of us who we would want to raise our son. All my son's godparents are from my side of the family as my husband has only one brother and isn't close to his cousins. We didn't want his brother as we don't like the way his partner raises her daughter, nor did we chose my closest friend for the same reason (she's now become very wierd so I'm glad she wasn't chosen).
Maybe explain to your husbnad why you want your sister and his younger sister. But get him to explain why he wants his older sister other than to just keep the peace in the family, as its a bit of a flimsy reason.
Hope I've been of some help with my rambling.
Kristy

member since 2004

Well the way we picked our older sons god parents was who was going to be the best role modles for him, We went with his best friend for god father because hes been there for him helping him and well just being a good friend, and my partners cusin, because of the same reasons. With our 6 month old we still havent decided on one! We really havent talked about it.
Each rite dwn what u want in a god parent, and then pick the person whos most likely to meet the needs of the child!
With us i pick the god mother and he picks the god father! just the ways its always been in our family
Good luck i hope it all wks out best for the child

Laurelle, Carlos (nearly 3) Kobe (7 months)

Hi Joshdan,

I agree that you both should talk to each other to find the reasons for your decisions. My husband and I are also going through the same thing of who is to become guardians. We both agree that one of his sisters is out of the question, but we too seem to 'dance' around the rest of our family members. I feel that your husband needs to realise that you want your family to be involved in something so important, and that if you and your son are closest to your sister, then that's the way you need to go. Godparents are not about pleasing the family, it's about choosing the right person to bring up your children (God forbid.) Your not being selfish at all, but seriously talk to your husband about it.

Rebecca, NZ, Boy born 30/10/03

I dont think your being selfish at all, personally i think he is, i agree with you, one on either side of the family.

With my little girl we have my sister who i am very close with and my brother in law who my hubby is very close to.

But for our next one i have no idea who we will have as we have so many close friends who would be great in the role. But i am probably being selfish myself there as i dont want hubbys sister and her hubby as we dont see them very often etc.

On the Religon part I cant comment on that sorry. Both my hubby and I are Anglican.
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