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The "nitty gritty" after a baby Lock Rss

Hi Guys

I need some serious help, when I had my little girl she gave me a tear internally and it required quite a few stitches.

When I had my exam at 8 weeks, it really hurt, almost excrutiating. My husband and I have tried sex since, and it still really hurts.

I was wondering if anybody else has had internal stitches and how long it was before they were able to have sex again (it's been 4 1/2 months now since I had Kyla), and if it was a while, how did you get back into it.

Sorry to be so personal, but I want intimacy back in my life!!

hi lacey,

i had a csect and my ds is nearly 1 and its very painful to have sex i dont know if it will ever b the same
Hi Lacey,

I can totally sympathise with you. I too had a bad tear and was very sore at my 8 week check up too, so much so that i had to ask the Doctor twice if everything was ok down there!

We didnt have sex again till DD was 5mths old and then it wasnt on the first try either. I felt so sorry for DH as it must have been hard for him to be so patient!

Just take it very slow, and try to get in the most comfortable position that you can. Alot of foreplay helps, but if that doesnt then try lube and start to enjoy your partners company again. Before yo know it you will be asking yourself why it took so long!!

I had 3rd - 4th degree tears. The doctor who stitched me said she didn't know how many stitches, there were no many to count. Ouch

I had bad pain at the 6 week check out even though the Dr tried to be very gentle.

First time in the bedroom, I cried. Because it hurt so bad, but because I could never imagine being able to enjoy sex again. My husband was really understanding.

If you are breastfeeding also, your body is creating a lot of estrogen and that makes you have no natural lubricant, so use a lot of lubricant from the chemist. Go on top to in a position where you are in control.

It is 6 months now for me, I started having sex at 3 months and it still hurts a bit now. But, it is much better.

Tell your partner to back off - enjoy being intimate on other levels (if u know what I mean!) and give yourself a break for a bit. Then get back into it in a little while when you are ready.

Jo, SA, Dylan born Dec 05

Hi lacey,

I had to be cut due to Tim was turning dark blue. The nurse told me it's the same as a second degree tear.

My husband was very understanding when we tried 3 months after Tim was born. It hurt like hell even with lube. We tried again when DS was 5 months old and it still hurt but only a little. Some times it hurts but most times it doesn't now. 9 months later.

Have you thought about asking your doc for a referral to a specialist I've forgotten what they're called (I got baby brain) just to make sure everything is OK?

Best of luck!

DS 13months


Hey... I had DD 7 mths ago and had 3rd degree tears. My DD tore me internally and I had to have an episiotomy to stitch the internal tearing over 50+ stitches so know how you are feeling...

My obstitrician at my 6wk check basically advised that I had healed well and to get back in the sack so to speak.

We actually tried when DD was about 3mths old and I will admit I had tears in my eyes. DH was really good about it and was trying to be as gentle as possible but it still did hurt.

Only advise I can give is that you have had 4 and 1/2 months and lots of healing would have been done by now.
Use lots of lubricant, try to get comfortable so not to be tense as this obviously makes it worse, and make sure you tell hubby that it is going to hurt you a bit and that you need him to be extremely gentle and just try.

My obstitrician also said that sometimes they may need to cut away some of the scar tissue that forms if sex continues to be extremely painful. So be mindful that you may need to get it checked out if you have been trying alot and is still painful.

Sex is easier nowdays - but life down there aint what it used to be.. as hubby says he thinks that the doctor stiched it up differently!! LOL
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