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Sleep Lock Rss

I have a boy who is 7.5 months and still has hardly any routine. I was feeling like a real failure as a mum - he falls asleep at the breast, he sleeps with me, I never let him cry. All the rules they make, I break. I read everything trying to find a solution and getting myself really down at my failure to produce a baby who sleeps through and has nice neat feeding times.

However, I have come into possesion of a little booklet that tells me this is the way it is, it's called 'Understanding Wakeful Babies'. Some babies never sleep through. Falling asleep at the breast is natural etc, etc. This tiny little booklet has changed things around my place. I no longer cower in shame when telling other mums that my son co-sleeps, that I don't do controlled crying, that my son has days when he may have 10 breastfeeds and I just let him do what he wants.

I know it's not for everyone. I just thought I'd write this to give others a little encouragement and to remind all the mums out there that the only right way is the right way for YOU.

I am no longer punishing myself, struggling to make me and my baby fit into some fantastic routine. I simply accept him and sleep when he sleeps to catch up on what I miss. He is a lot happier now that I've relaxed and we are both enjoying our time together. After all, being his mum is what I'm here for. Most other things can wait. For hundreds of years babies have been strapped to their mums, never put down and sleeping with their parents.

Once again, I stress that this isn't for everyone but
I see many of us having the same troubles on this forum, my sympathy goes to all mums. We do work hard, but it is rewarding - the most rewarding thing of all.

If you can adopt a relaxed take on sleeping and would like to read some positive views the booklet 'Understanding Wakeful Babies' can be ordered through Mothers Direct (there is a link at or from your local Breastfeeding Association.
Hi Tanith

I totally agree with you. I think there is so much pressure put on new mums to get babies into a routine as soon as you get home from hospital, do controlled crying etc etc and the list goes on!!! My son is 8 1/2 months old and I've never froced him into any routine, we've both just gone with the flow. I'm extremely lucky - he started sleeping through at 9 weeks old, but other than that he was never in any sort of routine. Sometimes he'd have 8 feeds per day, sometimes it would be 12. He slept in his bassinet in our room until he was 4 months old. He started getting into a more regular pattern at about 6 months when he started on solids, but he seems to change every couple of weeks. The nurse at our clinic said feeding newborns every 4 hours is a very old fashioned idea - not to mention unrealistic. So I would say to any mothers feeling the pressure - don't ever feel like a failure when you are giving your baby all the love he/she needs nothing else matters.

i agree
as they say in the movies
'YOU GO GIRL' hahaha!!!!!
i've had a few people tell me that the only place a baby should sleep is in their beds.
if my daughter falls asleep on the lounge , in her rocker , or in my arms , i just let her sleep. i know if i fall asleep on the lounge and get woken up and told to go to bed i get cranky cause my sleep has been interupted and its not always that easy to fall straight back to sleep after being disturbed.but when i go to bed i put hannah into bed, and too what happens if i go visiting , i cant take her bedroom with me.
my nurse and my doctor have said to me on several occasions how laid back and relaxed i am, i thought at first that was a bad thing, now i realise its the best way to be. we are the mums and what mum says, goes. smile

DD 13/11/03 -DD 11.11.05 - DS 17.4.08

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