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Marrage problems Lock Rss

Right now my husband and I are going though some marrage problems. We both want to stay and work at our marrge as we love each other dearly but the truth is I'm wondering if he will stay in the marrage. Its hard to know whats going though his brain at this moment if u know what I mean. Last week was hard as he totaly blew up but to a friend his feelings etc and they both came to me about the whole thing, most of all i had no idea his feelings etc and it totaly blew me away. I've honestly be strungling to get though and we are trying to work at it but yes I do still wonder. We have a 2 year old girl and I'm 26 weeks with our son. Have any of u gone though this? Did u work it out? what happened afterwards etc? Thanks

Emma 31/7/03, Daniel 11/1/06

Hi Jessica

My marraige went through some difficulties about 5 years ago and my only advice to you is to KEEP COMMUNICATING. We had been together for 10 years at the time and had slowly grown apart and found it easier to talk to other people than to talk to each other. But if you love each other and feel it's worth fighting for you can eventually get through it and come out stronger at the other end. Just keep talking about your feelings and be totally honest with each other. It was hard when we went through it but to have a child and be pregnant aswell is obvisouly doubly difficult but doubly worth fighting for - if it's what you truly want.

Maybe your husband talking to friends was his way of getting the ball rolling as he knew they would talk to you about it, perhaps he didn't know how to bring it up directly with you, men do some strange things.

Can you possible get someone to look after your daughter and the two of you go away for a weekend? Maybe a neutral, relaxed atmosphere with no distractions would be a good place to start and it makes it harder when things get difficult in the conversation for one of you to "walk away".

Anyway, I don't want to keep rambling on but in my experience the key was to keep talking and if you both truly want it to work out, then eventually it will.

Good luck, take care

Lisa W

Hi Jessica, most men don't communicate with their partners they expect them to know. But, yes they talk to their mates not that it solves a lot. My husband and I still go through all this, started when our daughter came along she's now 5 and we also have a 5month old son. You try and talk but they only hear what they want to. All the arguments we end up having build up inside me and end up exploding out . But it still doesn't get through. My hubby get worse. i don't know what will happen with us down the track we been together for 12 years. Good luck to you and with the birth of your boy but stay strong and don't back down on your point in the arguments!!

Amanda,NSW, 5yr old & 4mth old

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