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How do you deal with you babys father if he live in another country? Lock Rss

Just want some advice on how i should deal with my babys father if he live in another country ? He sends money back each week and asks how were doing ?but Im pissed off at him . hes not here for my baby or helping me . He said he want to be involved in my babys life but hes not even here . Our relationship ended bad he pretty much cheated on me and still in a relationship with her and i got nasty to him. Blahblab i just want him to step up or leave us alone .
Sorry he's not there helping you out.

How old is bubs? Next time he asks how things are going, maybe you could nicely suggest that he plans a trip sometime soon and comes to see your baby and all the things that he/she is doing. Mind you, he might bring her with him, so you need to be prepared for that.

Which is his home country? NZ or where he is living now? Is he likely to come home to NZ for good in the not too distant future? If so, maybe just let it be and see how things go.

Sorry, I really don't have much advice.
Thankfully he sends you some money. I hope he is responsible and sends you enough.

Hang in there Hun!

Thank you , my babys only 3months old.
When Baby was born he came back for a month and visited baby here and there and all he brough him was a big teddy bear while his family got clothes for baby . i dont think he will bring her back shes got 2 boys of her own, we use to be really good friend untill she go in the way , I dont think she would make a big move just for him . Thats why i think hes staying there to be with her.
But saying to me that he wants to be here for baby ? Trying to have the best of both worlds .
Nzs his home , im not sure he said hes gonah be saving up and look for jobs in nz online and by word of mouth from family friends here in nz but that does sound like much effort put in to being here for him .i think if he wanted to be here for baby he would moved back to be here and not stay there? I haven't text him for almost 2months now cause im that annoyed im just gona end up blasting his phone up telling him to step up when he wont. So i thought i try on here for some advice .i am still angry at him for hurting me so much
Thank you for your time smile

My childs dad lives in aussie, he was from there but moved to NZ for me, we broke up when my son was 8 months and he went back when my son was 14 months.
He hardly ever calls, he doesn't pay childsupport, my son is now 7 years old.
to be honest, the best thing to be is pleasant, when my sons dad calls every 2 years or so, I have always been nice, given him updates, and made it so it is not me that is keeping him from my son, but he chooses to not be there.

In the end it is the child that is hurt by not seeing/hearing from their dad. my son is very hurt by his dad not being around, but it isn't me keeping him from him, and I have always made sure of that.
What happened to me is I found out I was far better off with him in a different country than friends who had partners nearby. Then there is less interference. You can more easily move on with your life. Take care of yourself.
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