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  5. big gap between children anyone? 10 years+

big gap between children anyone? 10 years+ Lock Rss

My husband(37) and I(36) have 2 wonderful boys, 13 & 10 years old but I have always wanted another but circumstances were not right. However things have since changed and realising we are not getting any younger we are considering expanding our family. I would like to know if others have gone down this road and how they found the family dynamics with the large age gap.
Hi, I have 2 young children, 19mths, 5 years at home, I also have grown children, 21 - 27, that is a huge age gap and was basically like starting over.
The dynamic's in my family can't be compared to yours as the age gap is no where near what mine are but just wanted to say, my older kids love their little sisters very much and I am sure your son's would love a little brother or sister, Go for it!! It will be like starting over, everything has changed so much from how babies are now placed for sleeping to what you can or can't eat in pregnancy haha. Having a new baby in the house will sure change your lifestyle. Perhaps have a family meeting and discuss with your boy's how they would feel about it.
All the Best .... smile
Thanks for your reply - a good idea. We have mentioned to our boys briefly and they didn't seem to be opposed to the idea.
hello smile

my son is 10 years older than my DD and he absolutely loves her. We are also expecting our 3rd and he can't wait and has already put his order in for a brother. he really loves being the older brother so things worked out great for us smile

good luck x
I don't have a 10 yr gap in my family
But I come from a family were between me and the youngest their is 10 yrs
I never had a issue or any resentment towards my baby brother
I was more like a mommy/sister cos as a toddler he slept in my room and I would bath put Him to bed cos mum had 5 other kids

When he got older it changed I wouldn't discipline him or anything I'd actually help him do what he wanted like get into the veggie garden and eat ride a bike get up to more mischief
And whenever mum asked who did this blamed it on him
When the poor thing never even went near their

But once he learnt to talk and started telling we would bribe him to not tell or include him
Good memories
I come from a HUGE age gap family. Im the youngest, you could safely say that i was a surprise. My mother had 5 children. The age gap between me and the oldest child is 21 years!!! And between me and the second youngest is 10 years! In ways it was great because there wasnt any sibling rivalry and all my brothers and sisters thought i was the cutest thing ever (still do lol!)
But i was basically brought up as a only child because everyone had already left home, and my oldest sister already had her first child on the way. grin



Just to add mum was 42 when she had me....



There are 8 and 10 years between me and my younger brothers. I love them to bits. They used to bug me a bit with coming into my room and touching my stuff but I think if you make sure your older ones still get their privacy and aren't having to take care of the littlies all the time they will adore them and spoil them rotten.

Good luck!!

My husband(37) and I(36) have 2 wonderful boys, 13 & 10 years old but I have always wanted another but circumstances were not right. However things have since changed and realising we are not getting any younger we are considering expanding our family. I would like to know if others have gone down this road and how they found the family dynamics with the large age gap.
hi i am 41 i have a 23yr old and 21 yr old and a 10 yr old to my ex husband and i had a little girl last yr 2011 in march to my current husband and am currently trying for another. this was something that worried me a lot in the beginning but after she was born they totally love their new little sister to bits and understand that it doesnt mean i love them less or anything. i have researched a bit this time as i am now 41 but u r never to old to be a parent i think your children will totally be fine with it u just need to spend the time talking to them about it if u have the love to give and its something u really want then go for it. i have found many women having falling pregnant naturally my age and even older up to 47 so i am inspired. grin
Thanks everyone for all your answers - they make me feel reassured that families are very adaptable and no one appears to have been permanently scarred lol. I think I would regret it if I didn't follow my heart and try for another.
We have an 11 year old daughter who turns 12 in August, and our 2nd child is due in July so there will be a gap just short of 12 years between the two. She is extremely excited about finally having a sibling and had been wanting one for years so we are fortunate in that regard.

From the beginning we've included her in everything and always referred to him as "our" baby to ensure she's not left out. I think its important to not get carried away with the new arrival too much (though I must admit its hard not too!) and try and involve them in decisions as much as you can - i.e. asking for opinions on things like what baby outfit does she like, helping to choose nursery furniture etc. The other thing we did when decorating the nursery is we also let our 11yr old redecorate her room. Not a bad age gap as she is now moving in to that 'teenage' phase and has different tastes. Kids are pretty adaptable and I'm sure you'll be fine... all the best smile
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