Hello this is an email I recently received. It was called The Middlewife:-
This is funny but obviously a good reason why you should not let your children be there when you're having a baby!!!!!! What were they thinking....
7 Year olds can be so funny! They have their own perspective.
The Middle Wife. By an Anonymous 2nd grade teacher
I've been teaching now for about fifteen years. I have two kids myself, but the best birth story I know is the one I saw in my own second-grade classroom a few years back. When I was a kid, I loved show-and-tell. So I always have a few sessions with my students. It helps them get over shyness and usually, show-and-tell is pretty tame. Kids bring in pet turtles, model airplanes, pictures of fish they catch, stuff like that. And I never, ever place any boundaries or limitations on them. If they want to lug it to school and talk about it, they're welcome.
Well, one day this little girl, Erica, a very bright, very outgoing kid, takes her turn and waddles up to the front of the class with a pillow stuffed under her sweater. She holds up a snapshot of an infant. "This is Luke, my baby brother, and I'm going to tell you about his birthday. First, Mom and Dad made him as a symbol of their love, and then Dad put a seed in my Mom's stomach, and Luke grew in there. He ate for nine months through an umbrella cord."
She's standing there with her hands on the pillow, and I'm trying not to laugh and wishing I had my camcorder with me.
The kids are watching her in amazement. "Then, about two Saturdays ago, my Mom starts saying and going, 'Oh, oh, oh!' Erica puts a hand behind her back and groans. "She walked around the house for, like an hour, 'Oh, oh, oh! Now the kid's doing this hysterical duck walk, holding her back and groaning. "My Dad called the middle wife. She delivers babies, but she doesn't have a sign on the car like the Domino's man."
"They got my Mom to lie down in bed like this." Then Erica lies down with her back against the wall. "And then, pop! My Mom had this bag of water she kept in there in case he got thirsty, and it just blew up and spilled all over the bed, like psshhheew!" This kid has her legs spread and with her little hands are mimicing water flowing away. It was too much!
"Then the middle wife starts saying 'push, push, and breathe, breathe.'" "They started counting, but never even got past ten." "Then, all of sudden, out comes my brother. He was covered in yucky stuff, they all said was from Mom's play-center, so there must be a lot of stuff inside there." Then Erica stood up, took a big theatrical bow and returned to her seat.
I'm sure I applauded the loudest. Ever since then, if it's show-and-tell day, I bring my camcorder, just in case another Erica comes along. Life is meant to be lived . . . enjoy! Laughing helps. It's like jogging on the inside.
I personal wouldnt do it for a few reasons. It would be very hard for a young child to understand why mummy is in pain, as you know they pick up on our emotions. Then there is also the chance something went wrong, how would you explain that to a child?. What if you were rushed for an emergency caesarean? Who would go with you and who would say with your daughter?? What about the blood?? That could be pretty scary for a child. My husbands step mother took her 13 year old son and step son with her for the birth and her son really freaked out and her step son fainted! In the end the kids had more nurses than the mother giving birth. Please dont be offended as this is only my personal thoughts. It is your child and you know her better than anyone else. Good luck with what ever you decide.
P.S. I hope the email gave you a giggle!