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  5. A not so positive Outcome....

A not so positive Outcome.... Rss

It has been wonderful reading all the positive pregnancy and birth experiences...only I can't help but to bring to everyone's attention the need to be informed of all outcomes. My sister-in-law delivered her forth child on the 24th May, 2004, a beautiful baby boy (Joshua) - stillborn. He had died because of an umbilical cord knot that had prior to delivery. (She sensed something was wrong, got to hosptial and had the worst confirmed. Labour was then induced).
Her previous births had been fine, drug free and without complication. Joshua was full-term and otherwise perfectly healthy. My sister-in-law has since found out that this could have been detected by ultrasound monitoring......what a shame this service is not affordable and provided readily beyond 18 week scans. Following an experience as traumatic as this one, it is amazing how many people you encounter who have lost a little one. Safe and informed birthing to you all...

Louise, Finlay (4 Feb, 02), Mackenzie (18 Jan, 06)

It is with great sadness I read your post.....

The same thing happened to my ex sister in law when she was 8 and a half months pregnant. She noticed the baby hadnt moved so she took herself off to the Drs where is was confirmed they too could not find a heart beat but for her to go straight to the hospital. They did an ultrasound where it confirmed every mothers worse fears..........her baby had died in her stomach. She was then faced with the dilemma to either be induced to give birth and then go home or to have a caesarean and stay in the hospital in the ward with all the other mothers who had given birth to "living" babies for at least 5 days. She choose to be induced and went home to an empty house full of baby things. She was a school teacher in a small community and this was her first baby so they were all excited through the whole pregnancy. All the students were counting down the days and helping her choose names.

It turned out her baby had a few medical problem but none of them major but they believe it was the contribution of them all that caused his death.

On a happier note she did go on to have 3 beautiful healthy children after this...........

I hope your sister in law and her family(including yourself) are managing in what can only be described as a terrible, terrible sad time. We are thinking of you all!
Hi

Thankyou for sharing this story, as sad as it is! I think it is important for people to know things don't always end up perfect!

Big (((hugs))) to you and the family. I truelly cannot imagine the pain you must all be feeling.

Please come back and post if you feel the need to get things out, so to speak.

Lots of TLC wishes for you all,

Tepe

DD5, DS3, DS lost to SIDS at 6mths & DD6m

hey louise,
yes i totally agree the heath system should do regular testing on all preagnt women like me, as i had an ultra sound at 8.2 weeks to see how far i was then againat 12 weeks to make sure everything was good and then at 16 weeks as the dates were correct and then at 20 weeks then i became ill and had them on a weekly base as i was ammited into hospital due to high blood pressure and leaking protien (check my form out its premmie baby 14 weeks too early...
i feel deeply for ur family i can only image what its like....keep strong!

karen,NSW, mummy to Caitlin Born 14 weeks early

my aunt had a bubby born sleeping. i really dont like the stillborn word.

he would have been 5 this year she had 5 weeks to go and her placenta burst we could have lost her too. i recently did a scrapbooking album for her on her little baby who was born into the arms of jesus.

Narelle, Eilish 5th june 2002 TTC since dec 2002

Hi Narelle,

That's a lovely keepsake idea! I also love the words you use "who was born into the arms of jesus"!

Tepe

DD5, DS3, DS lost to SIDS at 6mths & DD6m

Thanks to all......yes, 'sleeping' does fit so much better (than stillborn) as Joshua did look like he was sleeping - and 'born into the arms of Jesus' is how his Mummy has come to terms with losing him. It was recently our Grandmothers 87th birthday (Joshua's great-nanny) and as she lives so far away from us all, I did a photo album celebrating her family and included two beautiful photo's of Joshua (one very special one of his mummy craddling him) - she was thrilled! He will always have a special place in our family and never be forgotten. Sadly, time is yet to heal our hearts and dry our eyes from this loss.

Louise

Louise, Finlay (4 Feb, 02), Mackenzie (18 Jan, 06)

I just think it is so good that we live in age where talking about and recording memories of such a tragic loss, is now accepted and encouraged. For however long these babies are with us, they are forever part of our hearts and families. We have a friend who has 'lost' a baby this way and she tells people she has four children when she is asked - three here and one with Jesus. That little boy is forever her child and a sibling to her other children. I can not imagine what it must have been like to have lived, years ago, when these things would never have been talked about.

Domestic Goddess Mum of Four!

braidon looked like he was sleeping. he looked so peaceful. i had to ask my aunty if i could have some pictures of him so i could do the album i didnt know how she'd react but she was over joyed i still thought about him. i wrote a fair few poems for her for braidon too and included them and stuff in the album. its the best thing i ever did. they gave me a great gift i got to see an angel before i had my daughter. if you would like to see a page i've done email me at kodeybear@hotmail.com or search online there are some nice ones out there. my fiances mother had twins die at 7 months or so gestation and she never got to see touch hold or anything. she only had the memory of being pregnant. my aunty got to spend time with him, got hand and foot prints, photos and stuff.

hope none of you have to go through the loss that our loved ones have suffered.

god bless

Narelle, Eilish 5th june 2002 TTC since dec 2002

louisek

emailed you a few of the pages i've done. my digital camera batteries died and i didnt know how much your email would hold. some like hotmail dont like to bigger files when you've got to much in your inbox..

and since i did a 20 page album....

i only picked a few. hope you like, hope these help.

Narelle, Eilish 5th june 2002 TTC since dec 2002

My grandmother lost her firstborn due to premature labour. My grandfather saw the baby, she lived for a few minutes, but they wouldn't let my grandmother see her. To this day she still wonders what her baby looked like - her biggest fear is that she was downs syndrome, and it caused a fair few arguments between her and my grandfather because he would never talk to her about what he had seen.
I can't imagine how horrible that must be, to carry a child for all that time, and then have it taken away and having to ct as if the whole thing didn't happen at all.
I'm so glad things have changed. Last year my aunty lost a baby for reasons unknown, and she got to hold and touch her baby, and has footprints etc. It is such an important part of the grieving process.

Mum to Maya Grace 02-03, Sienna & Mercedes 10-06

i shed a tear when i read this. your poor grandmother. i feel for her so much. i guess in the old days it was believed that it would be easier not to see and to get on with life.

i am so happy they let you spend as much time with them, hand and foot prints, the hospitals take photos too *most do* lock of hair...

they help as much as they can in this our of darkness. how could he have not spoke about their child? i find this extremely heart breaking.

my thoughts are with her.

Narelle, Eilish 5th june 2002 TTC since dec 2002

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