My 2yr 8 month old displays jealousy to his sister who is 14 months old and vice versa - it starts early!! For eg if I cuddle my son, then my daughter might get indignant and want to be cuddled too. I think it is something that just happens naturally unfortunately.
I think it is important for the older child to have a 'safe' play space. I allow my son to go into his room and close his door if he wants to play with something intricate and doesn't want his little sister 'helping'. I try to advocate that it is ok to want to play on his own, but then he needs to go to his room to do it. If he is playing in the lounge then he needs to share his toys. For example, this gives him the choice to be able to build high towers on his own, without his sister knocking them down, or play in the lounge and make a game of it by inviting his sister to knock them down.
I think it is very important for the older child to be able to do some things without being interrupted by the younger one. It is also important for both of them to learn to respect the other ones space. Sometimes my son has to sit back and watch while my daughter attempts to accomplish a task he has mastered (and just watching is difficult for him!).
Try to have special things that you do with each child too. I am working on getting that right at the moment. I think each child needs to have special time with you (not easy to accomplish!!).
Good luck - you are not alone!
Vanessa, QLD (2 children)