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What to say to parent who found out bub is deaf? Rss

I just found out my girlfriends son has been diagnosed deaf : ( I don't know what to say to her to make her feel ok. Anyone experienced this?

Mumma of 3.

I don't have any experience with this, but maybe take your lead from her? Ask her how she is feeling about it? She may be feeling like it is the end of the world (which of course it isn't) or she may be focusing on the positives. Either way, she will probably just be greatful for a good friend to listen to her. It would probably be a big shock for her.

Ask her if you can do anything to help - does she have other kids that could do with babysitting? Or make her some meals to put in the freezer for those can't be bothered nights?

Sorry I'm not much help, hope all goes well. Would love to hear how you, your friend and her family go.

I just found out my girlfriends son has been diagnosed deaf : ( I don't know what to say to her to make her feel ok. Anyone experienced this?


I dont think there's anything you can say to make her feel ok about this, but what you can do is be there for her and ask how she's doing, be there so she can vent or cry on your shoulder - no doubt she's in a bit of shock at the moment and sad. Maybe invite her over, or out for a coffee.

I'm not sure about offering to make meals for her, perhaps she would need help with babysitting if she needs to take bub to appointments or whatever but I think that's jumping the gun at this stage - for me I'd feel bad for my baby not being able to hear, but baby is still ok - not like terminally ill or something... cant find the right words but offering to make meals and look after her other kids doesnt seem the right thing to do in this situation.
Quin1901 my Aunty actually went through the same thing with my little cousin who is now 12. When he was born my Aunty kept taking him to the hospital telling them something wasn't right but they kept sending her away and finally when he was 2 they found out he was deaf sad all I can say to u is to just b there for ur friend because there is nothing u can say or do to fix anything unfortunately. As for my cousin he doesn't suffer, he is a awesome kid who has friends and goes to school, plays sport and the only difference Is he gets extra help at school. Another thing I will say is that my Aunty doesn't struggle with him being deaf, she struggles with him being a spoilt brat because when we all found out he was deaf we spoilt him and let him get away with everythin so the best advice to give would b to try and treat them like any other child otherwise she's gonna have much bigger problems on her hands. I know easier said than done but I see what my Aunty goes through and her kid is the boss at home. Also as technology progresses who knows what's around the corner??

Hope this helps a little. Good luck and god bless

Wow that's a really rough one. As everyone said just be there for her if she wants to talk. She may want help in locating a deaf or hearing impaired support group? Also there are varying degrees of deafness, I am wondering if he is 100% deaf or only partially. As someone said there is great technology out there now which can help some people (but I would hold off mentioning that until you knew his degree of deafness).

Also you could offer to help learn sign language, it's quite fun I used to know a lot at school but can only remember the alphabet now... but even that is sometimes handy!

I think it's really nice that you have come on here to try & find ways to help her smile
My DS was diagnosed with a hearing impairment at birth and I was absolutely devastated. All I needed was the love and support of my close friends and family, it really got me through. Initially just someone to listen.

My DS was diagnosed with a moderate loss and has worn hearing aids from 11 weeks of age. I am in QLD and the assistance I get from Australia Hearing (all services are free) and the Royal Institute for Deaf and Blind Children is amazing. As well as extra assistance from Centrelink.

With all this assistance he is now a perfectly normal 2 year old, his speech is better than some children his age. I am sure she will be put in contact with the relevant people that can help her and her son. I definately can't complain about the variety of help/services available for hearing impaired children here in Australia. Depending on where you are there would most likely be a support group (unfortunately where I am there isn't) or at least other parent's in the same situation that she can get in contact with.

Sorry I really don't know what other info would help. This is only the second time I have replied in the forums. So I hope this makes sense.

Hope this helps a little.
My little one has lots of things wrong including deafness in one ear. There isn't anything you can say to make her feel better except to acknowledge really how hard it must be for her.
I'd defintely mention to her about services available for early intervention. As was said the Royal Institute for Deaf and Blind Children are fantastic. I am with them in Sydney and they were one of the greatest resources in a practical sense. They came out fortnightly and worked on play and the relevant milestones for her age.
There are so many resources and services around it's a matter of tapping into the ones that suit both bub and mum. It can be a pretty dark and lonely place at times for mum so acknowledging and just regularly offering support is important. Also looking at the online support and forums helps.
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