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I'm the Dummy Rss

Hi

My little boy. Jasper, is 15wks and in the past couple of weeks has decided that the only way he can get to sleep is on the breast. I gave him the dummy at 6wks, but he won't have a bar of it now. He used be able go to sleep on his own and was sleeping through approx 8hrs a night, but now after around 4hrs wakes and the only way for him to resettle is by feeding him (which isn't even a feed, as he just sucks) but he settles within 5min. It's so fustrating.
Does anyone have any ideas how to break this habit, now rather than later?

Thanks Karen

baby boy, 12/03

Firstly - YOU ARE NOT THE DUMMY!

Hannah was exactly the same. She would only ever fall asleep on the breast and even then as soon as I put her down she would wake up! This is the method I used to help her go to sleep by herself. If he's not really feeding when he wakes up in the middle of the night then this is the method i would use.

Okay - here's the sleep strategy that I've read about. (Sorry, I've written this about a girl, not a boy)

Put your baby in her cot - tuck her in, kiss her goodnight and leave the room (or stay - its your choice, but I found leaving easier). When your baby starts crying, leave it for about 30 secs and then walk into the room and roll your baby onto their side (preferably facing away from you). (I am naughty - I put her on her tummy) Then do things like patting them on the hip or back. You can try rocking them backward and forward, singing, humming, stroking your baby (although I found the last one to be the WORST thing I could possibly do!) Some people find that just holding your baby firmly on the shoulders and hip is the best thing to do

Use one of these strategies until she stops crying or relaxes. If the strategy you're using doesn't work in 5 mins - use another. Keep persisting for 20 mins (or as long as you can take it! Try not to give in!!!) After twenty minutes you and your baby have had enough and get her out of bed, give her a cuddle and wait for a little while before putting her to bed. (please note this time frame changes after 6 months). Leaving your baby for more than 20 mins makes them worse!

Its a really hard thing to do but totally worth it when you can just put your baby in bed and she goes to sleep with minimum fuss!

If it doesn't get any better after two weeks - GO and get help from a daystay clinic or a overnight place! We all need sleep and we all need some help with this!

Okay - I hope this helps. This is all stuff I've read in books and got information from sleep clinics and so on. I just wanted to say that I'm not an authority on the issue - but found that this has worked with my little girl and this method is advocated by the health services in my local area.

Good luck! And remember you're not alone!

Hannah (3 yrs) and Harry's (born 22/7) Mum! QLD

Thanks for the advise, I will definately try it, although 'the not giving in' part will be the hardest. I dream for the night where I put him to bed and it's that easy.......
Once again thanks and I will give it ago.

Cheers Karen

baby boy, 12/03

Hi, would just like to let you know a little bit of info I have recently learnt. It is completely natural for babies to fall asleep at the breast as when you are breastfeeding youre body releases a hormone called CCK. This is why babies fall asleep at the breast and also why we get so sleepy when breastfeeding. My boy still falls asleep at the breast and still wakes for feeds at nite (more for comfort sucking!). I have been lucky in that he will take a dummy but if he wakes at nite a dummy will not settle him. I know this probably doesn't help you much but I've found it easier to go with the flow of what Ezrah wants. Whatever sleep I miss at nite I try catch during the day. This certainly doesn't suit everyone but it works for me.

Best of luck, you do have my sympathy.
Karen,
I also had the same problem with my son. When we brought him home he was the perfect baby, then suddenly he didn't want to go to sleep for fear of missing out on something.
I did a similar thing to Hannah's mum. Here's what I did:
Put him in his cot, wrapped before or after didn't matter with Liam.
Turned him onto his side but facing me so that he could see I was still there but I didn't make eye contact with him.
We had a toy given to us when Liam was first born which has the pictures scrolling round as well as soft music, he would watch this instead of me.
I would then with my left hand hold him at his shoulders, holding his arm so he couldn't move it, then my thumb and forefinger from that hand would hold his dummy in place ( it sounds wierd but with this hand I could hold down his arm, keep his head from wriggling about plus keep his dummy in)
With my right hand I would pat him on his back until his eyes closed a couple of times, or until he went to sleep. Depending on how much he'd fight it. Gradually I could get to the stage of just holding him and patting occasionally. Then last week he started putting himself to sleep again by himself. And all I did was have music playing with his toy and put the dummy in, if he spat it out, put it back in but not talk to him or make eye contact. Now most times I only put it back once.
I also got hold of some relaxation music which I have playing for him when he's sleeping and he sleeps for longer periods. It doesn't have to be one for babies, mine aren't and they're working fine. He also likes Guy Sebastian.
Hope this helps you.
Kristy, Liams mum.

member since 2004

Thanks so much for all your advise, it's amazing how you feel as though you are the only one that has ever gone through something like this and that it must be something that you are doing wrong.
It's a relief that I'm not entirely nuts.

Thanks again, I'm trying everything.

Karen

baby boy, 12/03

I have a little girl who is 18 weeks and she used to go to sleep without the dummy, but last two nights I have had to go in 4-5 times with the dummy, she also has started waking through the night, and a feed is the onlt thing that will get her through another 3 or 4 hours. It is all so frustrating, I also didn't know whether to feed her because of bad habit thing, but health nurse said if feeding helps her go to sleep, then use that??????
She didn't seem too concerned with bad habit. She reakoned after 6 mths maybe try something different if it was still going on.
U not alone. I thought I was.
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