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Still sleeping with me! Rss

I hoping for a bit of advice from fellow mums. I have a beutiful 8 month old boy who is my first and i have got into some bad habits with. I am breast feeding and of a nightime i lay down with him on our bed and he falls asleep on the breast. I just don't know where to start with teaching him to settle himself and to learn to put himself to sleep. Everytime i place him in his cot he screams and becomes very worked up and i give in and pick him up. I would like to know how other mums in the same situation went about teaching them to sleep independently. I love co-sleeping with him however it has come a point where theres just not enough room for the three of us.

Mum 2 Hayden & Carlie

Hi Marcie
Dont worry, my daughter still sleeps with me 95% of the time at night. It is a very hard habit to break and most of the time i am just too tired to try and break it! But if it is really bothering you i would suggest to set your boy's cot up next to your bed and hopefully he will realize that you are still close by and drop off to sleep. Then you could try gradually moving the cot into his room. Otherwise you could maybe try the pick up put down method by the baby whisperer.Check out her website www.thebabywhisperer.com. There is plenty of great advice and a chat room. It will be hard to break the habit, but anything is possible! Let us know how you go.Good luck
Hi Marcie
I've just joined this parents exchange hoping that i'd get some insight into some "issues", namely sleep. Came across your msg and went "BINGO"! Just the type of msg I wanted to post too so if there is anyone else out there who can HELP!
My baby is coming on to 7 months and yes, I'm doing the "do" and letting him sleep with me and he basically uses my breasts as a dummy. Have you tried the dummy? It doesn't work on our bub - he is very persistant and determined. The thing is, Keegan was actually "trained" to sleep through the night and when he became unsettled I would usually pat him back to sleep which sometimes took ages. Sooooo the easy way out was just to pull my shirt up and let him suck. I'm not sure if I regret doing this. Like you, I do love sleeping with him and cuddling with him. So many a times, I've asked myself if I could put him through the controlled crying method. How many times does your baby wake through the night? Keegan doesn't wake up as per se, he just begins to get unsettled and looks for yup, you guessed it, the breast!!! Its come to the point that we might start shopping for a king size bed as hubby is now sleeping on a mattress on the ground! I never intended for Keegan to sleep with me - he has a cot and all!
Can I also ask - how does your baby sleep during the day?
I don't know if this helps but sometimes - I tell myself (to protect my sanity) - you just have to do what you have to do!
I'm also thinking of getting the Amby Hammock. Have you heard of this..? Its quite expensive and I'm wondering if its worth the investment to wean him off the breast at nights. I know he'll still cry for me.
Let me know how you're going too as I don't know any other mothers (everyone in my mothers group has their babies sleeping independently and through the night!) and would love to share.

Frazzled mom, loving it tho'

Hi Marcie,

We had heaps of troublewith Alynta when she hit about 5 1/2 months and stopped sleeping through. As a result of this and me getting tired I got lazy and started pulling her into bed with me then we'd both fall off to sleep. The problems really started when she wasn't able to go back to sleep without being in bed with me andwithout a feed. The tireder I got, the worse the problem got and she began waking even more (anywhere from 3 to 8 times in a night) Both she and I got tireder and grumpier until finally a friend loaned me a book called 'Babywise' when Ally was about 8months.

What a Godsend, it guides you through what they call PDF or Parent directed Feeding and within 1 1/2 - 2 wks, she was not only sleeping through, but was also having structured daytime sleeps aswell. Oh Happy family!

Alynta is now just over 12months and everything is still going great because the book helped us learn and lay some basic foundations. Her grandparents are amazed at the difference in her and our sanity has been saved. It also solved our clinginess problems.

You may need also to check out the second in the series which is Babywise 2 and deals with 6 - 15 month olds more specifically, but the first one will give you all the foundational info you need.

Hope this helps, would love to know how you go. If you want anymore info, let me know.
Hi cynth,
I have tryed the dummy however he rejects it everytime. Hayden is doing the same as your bub, he isnt waking up, he is unsettled and the only way i attempt at putting him back to sleep is straight on to the boob, now that is all he wants when he is unsettled at night. I had to laugh whan you said about the kingsize bed, we thought about that as well but i said no-way thinking there would be an end to these sleeping arrangements very soon but in hindsight i was very wrong.
Hayden is waking about 3-4 times during the night in which case i give him the boob and we go straight back to sleep!!!! My hubby is in haydens single bed in his room with an empty cot! As a first time mum i never really looked into settiling techniques in the first few months so i didn't know i was doing anything wrong. He sleeps pretty well during the day now. He goes down for about 1-2 hrs in the morning btwn 9-10am and then about 1hr in afternoon, however he falls asleep on the breast! opps! Iam telling myself to protect my sanity that this wont go on forever! But will it?
Hayden is now 9 1/2 months and is pulling himself to standing up and won't be far of walking i think. I am given everything a break at the moment and will start it all over again very soon. i look forward to that!

Mum 2 Hayden & Carlie

Dear Marcie
Like you, I was not well informed about settling techniques when Keegan was newborn, maybe we were told, but I had "deaf ears"!!. I also had trouble with my milk coming in so was told by the lactation consultant to put baby on the breast as many times as possible!!! So as a result Keegan used to fall asleep on the breast, and everytime he awoke from slumber, I would put him on the breast thinking that he's hungry. I was so frustrated not knowing how much he was taking, and as they say "breastfeeding on demand"!
Well we should give ourselves more credit! We're not doing anything wrong! Of course we wouldn't be discussing this issue if our babies slept how they are supposed to. Sometimes I tell myself that as long as my baby is a healthy and happy one that's all that matters. Like you I also hope that his sleep associations will just wear off ~!!!!!!!!! Apparently, they don't - they evolve!!!
At least Hayden sleeps well during the day even on the boob! Keegan used to sleep 30 minutes, then he went through a period of sleeping up to 2 hours which was heaven to me and now he's back to sleeping short durations again. I push him on the stroller to sleep during the day but its hard work so sometimes I just succumb and give him the breast! Do you have to wait a while until he latches off or is in deep sleep, then put him down? When you put him down, does he stirr and wake up..???
Right now my hubby is home from work early and is trying to put Keegan to sleep..good luck! I think we might just head out for some night shopping!!! Is Hayden talking yet??? My SIL had her bub on her boob to sleep till the baby was 15 months..at that stage, they can basically understand you more..soooo maybe we can try that from 12 months (not long for you!). How long are you intending to breastfeed Hayden for?
Have to run, look forward to hearing from you!

Frazzled mom, loving it tho'

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