Hi, dont despair you have no idea how many of us did the exact same things, to begin with it is the easiest way to get them to sleep but with me by 4 months and id had enough, my bub would fight and scream while i was rocking, patting walking and shhing all at the same time for anywhere upto an hour and half and i knew that something had to give.
Mine also wasnt to bad at night but the day sleeps were terrible, until i sorted them out i had no idea how much of her behavior was out of overtiredness.
If you tried the control crying and it didnt work for you then i would suggest to give it an hour, the sleep schools reccomend an hour then if they havent settled to pick them up and offer a feed,when i first started i would feed and change her just before to put my mind at rest worrying about all the reasons she was crying so if i ruled them out at least it was a start.
If you could go for 45 mins then id say you are definatley ready for this to work it can take up to 2 weeks to be confident they will sleep silenlty when you put them down,even now it has been 4 weeks for me and she still tries to buck the rules occasionally.
The first day i did it she went for 45mins then went to sleep and that night it was 55mins and i was about to go in and offer food and she fell asleep but after that it never lasted more than 30mins and that was at 7pm bedtime when she would have a fit. After the first day she went down great during the day but threw a fit at the night bedtime and that lasted for almost 2 weeks.
If you arent 100%sure what your doing is right then i would highly reccomend a day stay at a sleep clinic, thats what i did as i could never have let my bub scream like that at home and would have called it quits before the 10min mark as my bub is a screamer not a crier.
She would scream wildly in anger and eventually the pauses in the middle would get longer and longer until she went to sleep.
As long as there a even quick pauses it means that they are regulating their crying which means there isnt any "real" distress although you'd swear i was cutting her leg off.
I hope any of this can help a little, you have done well to at least try at home, and if you are truely ready to make the change then im sure you will make it happen, it was invaluable to me and the only thing i can say is that if you act confident and sound confident (even if you arent)then bub will feel that and know that its ok and she is safe.
Amanda,Perth,nearly 10 Month baby Girl