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Controlled crying Lock Rss

Can someone explain what controlled crying is? I have heard it used in conversation but I am not sure how it is done. Thanks.


What I have heard about it, is that babies are taught to sleep on their own in a controlled setting. In this enviornment, children are not allowed to be picked up or rocked to sleep regardless of how much crying is done. Day sessions are organised where advice, suggestions and background information about sleeping is given to the parents. Some parents find these sessions useful, whereas for others very heartbreaking as nobody wants to see their child cry uncontrollably. In most cases, parents who need help with their babies sleeping do these sessions. It's not for all!!
I understand controlled crying to be when baby is crying in bed, to go in after 10 minutes and comfort them with out getting them out of bed. Then when you leave the room if they start crying again leave it 15 minutes. So the intervals you go into the room get longer. This can work for some babies, but others you can spend all night getting them to sleep. It is worth a try though if you have a baby that does not like to sleep when put to bed awake. Good luck and let us know how you get on.

Deena NZ New mum

Deena got it right. It will take about 3 days to instil it into your baby and there will still be times where your baby just isn't going to go to sleep that way. I did it wth my 10 month old daughter and it worked. You just need to be tough on yourself and let them cry for a bit. If the cry gets distressed then definately go to the baby but if it is just a "hey come and get me" cry them let bubs wait a bit longer. Each time you go into the room, pick bubs up and give them a quick cuddle and tell them it's sleep time then put them straight back down again.
The only thing I would suggest if you're going to use a form of controlled crying is that you don't leave your baby crying alone for more than 10 mins. Its generally agreed that 10 mins is the maximum time you should leave a crying baby. It doesn't mean you pick them up when you walk back in - it just means that you sit with them until they're calm enough for you to leave again.

I used a modified controlled crying technique (which is recommended for babies 6 - 12 months) on my 6 month old (which is the youngest age for controlled crying) and within the day I was able to put her in her cot and she would fall asleep on her own. (Hooray!)

We still haven't figured out night time sleeping - but all in good time!

Hannah (3 yrs) and Harry's (born 22/7) Mum! QLD

does the controlled crying still work if his cot is in our room? my son is 11 mnths old, has been a dream child sleeping thru the nite from 7wks old.
He has 5 teeth with the 6th on its way thru. He has started waking in the nite, stirring restlessly, if we put his dummy bak in his mouth he goes back to sleep. However from 8.30pm, this can occur 6 or so times prior to 2am.. I am contemplating controlled sleep??
ps we have no probs sleeping during the day.. getting him to sleep not a problem.. its the nite sleeps we are now having probs with? am i getting up to him too quickly?
there is a great book called Toddler Taming by Dr christophr green. it's for kids 1-4 years old..or maybe 5 ( can't remember). anyway there is heaps of really good parenting advice and answers for heaps of common issues from head banging to toileting including sleep isues in it. he has a great controlled crying technique in there which I won't explain but it's worth getting a copy even if from the library. your child is close enough to 1 year to do it. I tried it wih my baby after a sleep consultant failed and we had months and months of no settling at bed time and multiple night waking. It worked in one night but it did take 2 hours of crying whilst following the incremental entry times by the clock. I found it flexible depending on your temperament and although it challenged us listening to him cry it was over in one night.

highly recommend this book.

If you fancy a laugh, visit my blog which is basically a collection of observations and rantings about motherhood, people and the mundane. See

I just reread your about your post again...

I would lose the dummy...herein lies your problem!!!! if you don't feel you can do this I suggest putting multiple dummies in his cot and teach him, by holding his hand, how to find it in the night rather than calling for you to do it. if he's crying for the dummy, controlled crying is not your solution. it's a sleep aid. lose the sleep aid, lose the night waking!

If you fancy a laugh, visit my blog which is basically a collection of observations and rantings about motherhood, people and the mundane. See

I agree with Tezzamumma, Toddler Taming is Fantastic and he also has one called Babies!: a parent's guide to enjoying babies first year. I have used his version of control crying which says you can pick them up to comfort them if you have to & it worked with both of them in just a couple of nights. I also think the dummy could be your problem, it would definitely be worth trying to away with it anyway.


There are so many different ways of control crying, cry it out, self settle, that simply asking people what they did may not be helpful. why don't you google it, or go to your local library? I think that when you want to try something like this you should use first hand imformation from a reliable source not a basic outline from someone else.

If it's a case of not wanting to get up to give bubs back his dummy then for control crying wont work properly because bub is using the dummy as an aid. The only way to not have to get up to give the dummy back is for him to learn to do it himself or to take the dummy away.

(Noddy's not fat ffs!)

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