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grrrrrr! Rss

am i being unreasonable here? last night we were at MIL house, and she was cooking a roast dinner. i was sitting in the kitchen holding DS when she came up with a piece of lamb the size of a 5 cent piece and shoved it in his mouth. he is not even 4 months old yet! i immediately grabbed it out, saying he might choke. she was shocked. she was like, 'no of course he's not going to choke. he will suck on it then swallow it. trust me, ive had 3 kids.' it made me so angry! he's 15 weeks old and shes trying to give him meat already! i dread to think what she does when im not around! i couldnt believe she could be so stupid. she just put it right in his mouth and walked away! omg im still angry!

Tania. WA, Daniel - 26/01/06... smile

You are not being unreasonable at all! My MIL drove me nuts with "My boys were all on solids before they were 6 weeks"and proceeded to give Amy Choc pudding (at 6 weeks) while we were at the dinner table! All I could think was how many nappies am I going to have to change!

Jilly, Qld, Mum to Amy 14/12/05 & Rebecca 20/7/07

No you are not being unreasonable...I completely understand.

It is really hard sometimes knowing what to say, I have a similar problem being that MIL thinks that the way SIL raised her kids is the only way to do it. Things like "Oh don't use that formula she use this one and her kids were fine with it", "She had her boys on solids at 3 mths" "Alisha can't be teething, her boys didn't get teeth till almost 9months" "She said that you have to put a wedge thing in their cot to stop them rolling" "No don't use panadol she uses Dymadon it's much better" - they even sent me a bottle!!! Now it's daycare , we got offered a spot which I am taking but now its "What $51 a day that is way too much she only paid $36 and she got back a big rebate at the end of the year"

I do love my MIL but sometimes I am really glad we don't live in the same town. I just listen to her advice and then do what works for me.

I found that the reply "Yes that may have worked (or been the case) then, but they have done more research and found that now....blah blah blah.

I hope it gets better for you.

Natalie QLD, Alisha Rose 13-12-05

wow thats a bit much isnt it,thats would be like shoving a whole raost in her mouth and saying "suck"
you did the right thing removing it!!!!!





xxx

Lillie....1 year old!!!

My mum ran her finger through the juices on her plate (meat juices, salad dressings etc.) and shoved her finger in my sons mouth when he was about 8 weeks old. I was really agro and asked her at what age had she started myself and my sister on any form of solids her reply was not until 4 months. I asked her why if we started solids at 4 months did she think it would be O.K. to do this with MY 8 week old especially salad dressings and her reply was I don't know. My hubby stopped the fight that this started when he stuck mums fork in the piece of steak left on her plate rubbed it around in the juices then jammed it in her mouth wiggling it about like a mad thing as she had done with her finger in my bubs mouth. He then asked her if she liked it? When she replied with a rather firm NO then he told her he was sure his son had not liked it either and that it would not happen again. She didn't dare argue with him as she did with me. You have every right to be angry bubs-and-us and although your MIL might be angry if you put your foot down it would be far better to have her off side than for your bub to choke or have a bad reaction to something she gives him. I am sure they forget what age they really started doing what with their bubs as I very much doubt she would have done this to her own kids at that age.

Kel, Tas, mother to Ryan 5 mnths

It isnt unreasonable at all.

For some reason other people are really amused at putting things in our childrens mouths or making dumb comments like 'have u given her a steak yet?'. I mean seriously... I just dont get it! Why do they feel the need?

I think that especially families should have the common sense to say - are they on solids yet? can i give them some of whatever to try? and give the parents the opportunity to make that decision.

Hi,

You aren't being unreasonable and I have had a similar expereince with my cousins who did something similar. They gave my baby some bread and fruits (which I had not previously introduced) and then my ncle was going to serve her some chocolate cream from his cake!!! Lucky that I said that cake was reserved for when she turned one and not before, but as for my cousin who was giving her little bits to eat, she has 3 children of her own, all in primary school now, but was a bit upset that she did that even though I had said that I hadn't given her those foods yet. My mum used to give us little tastes of juices of meats, rece porridge etc...but I think it is different when you are in control of what you are introducing your child rather than someone else. MIL are funny things and they fail to realise that some practices in looking after children have changed from when they were looking after theirs. You can always let your MIL know that meat for babies so young is inappropriate and her behaviour is unacceptable and she needs to respect you and how you are bringing up your little boy.

Perhaps you should try shoving a roast in her mouth and walking away!

SJ
Hi,

You aren't being unreasonable and I have had a similar expereince with my cousins who did something similar. They gave my baby some bread and fruits (which I had not previously introduced) and then my ncle was going to serve her some chocolate cream from his cake!!! Lucky that I said that cake was reserved for when she turned one and not before, but as for my cousin who was giving her little bits to eat, she has 3 children of her own, all in primary school now, but was a bit upset that she did that even though I had said that I hadn't given her those foods yet. My mum used to give us little tastes of juices of meats, rece porridge etc...but I think it is different when you are in control of what you are introducing your child rather than someone else. MIL are funny things and they fail to realise that some practices in looking after children have changed from when they were looking after theirs. You can always let your MIL know that meat for babies so young is inappropriate and her behaviour is unacceptable and she needs to respect you and how you are bringing up your little boy.

I agree with Mimmy, perhaps you should try shoving a roast in her mouth and walking away!

SJ


OMG! I feel so sorry for our little babys some times. You absolutely did the right thing, I cant believe we spend every waking minute of our days and nights caring for our babys, making sure they are not in any danger or can be harmed in any way, stressing that they might get sick, staying up at night to sterelise and clean so they dont catch anything or have a bad reaction, and then some one else comes along and shoves a bit of roast lamb in their mouths!! Whats with that! How dare she just go ahead and do what ever she likes to your child, even if she is the grandmother she still has No right....
Its a shame we have to watch the oldies just as much as we watch our children, My own mother is forever trying to give my 7 month old McDonalds french fries???? And when I say No Way she looks at me like I am denying him or being mean to him. Hello Grannies they are babies!! tongue

I know how you feel.
Everytime we take my DD to my MIL house she gives her biscuits to eat. For crying out loud, my daughter has just turned 7 months and I dont want her to have biscuits all the time. On mother's day she offered my DD in front of us all a very dry biscuit with grated walnuts in it. One good way of choking my DD. This type of biscuit is even too hard for me to eat.

I dont understand why they just stay out of it and let us decide what to give our own babies.
NOT SURPRISED!! Everyone seems to have this problem with MIL but not me from the very first comment on what she could have my response was "You've had your kids, this one's mine. She'll have what I give her and won't have anything I don't agree with so back off"!

I know how it feels to have to be told all the time she can have this can't she. Relations or not it's just unacceptible to me.

Now everyone's great they ask can she have this and when I say no I just give them an alternative and give her something she can have.

But to be shoving meat in at 4 months I would have blown a fuse!! Everything is different now a days. Tell her to back off and not feed him until you say he can eat it!
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