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dad doesn't want to know Lock Rss

Oh it suxs that you have to go through it all aye, i cant believe guys think that they can get away from taking responsibility for their actions!

I think its great that you are standing up to him! i am ignoring emilys dad and hoping one day he will come to senses and realise what he is missing out on, its kinda risky coz he may never come round which will be a shame for emily. but i figure i'd rather have a father around her that actually wanted to be there rather than someone who makes it obvious they just dont care, coz that can hurt more!i wish i was as strong as you though so i could stand up to him!

Keep me posted on how things go aye, i think you are doing a great job smile
Hi everyone!
thought i would just update you all on whats going on!
emily is now 11months old and boy has it gone fast! i cant believe that she is nearly one!!!
Her dad came round to see her last week and although it was weird and emily didnt really want to know him (coz she doesnt recognise him) i think he is going to start to make more of an effort with her which would make me really happy if he does. I'm not expecting much from him but we are going to visit his family this weekend so they can get to know emily better, so fingers crossed some progress gets made and emily can finally start to get to know her dad properly! i still feel some anger towards him for being so slack but i'm trying to put that aside for emilys sake, and help him get to know his daughter and he has said he would like to be in her life more, i just hope he is being serious!! will keep you updated with progress!
thats great news for Emily. good luck and keep strong.

DD 13/11/03 -DD 11.11.05 - DS 17.4.08

My daughter is about to turn 1. Her dad, Luke, has now decided that because she can just about walk and can feed herself that he wants to see her. (now she's a real person.

Luke's mum knows she is more than welcome to come over any time, but I think she feels uncomfortable with the situation between Luke and myself. We try and ring her every 3-4 weeks and go and see her. Maybe you should try that with Emily's grandparents. It can be hard for the fathers family in that they don't want to start trouble with going to see their grandchild, but they really want to.

Hope that might help you a bit.
Good Luck.

Thanks for that penn_1, i think you are right!! Emily's dad is starting to show a lot more interest in her and i think it is because she can do alot more now. I took emily to see his family on the weekend and i know that they were really glad to see her, and i think they were quite shocked to see how much she has changed. Emily really enjoyed herself there so that was good and i am going to start to make more of an effort with them, because i think they really miss seeing there granddaughter and like you said, dont really want get involved with our problems. i'm not going to rush into things as it is taking abit of adjusting for me, but i think that with time, things will hopefully turn out ok!
It really sucks when they don't want to know their child until they can do things by themselves. Luke has another child (Blake, He's nearl 2) who he now has 3 or more times a week. When he was little he only took him once a fortnight or once every 3 weeks.
When I fell pregnant with Milly Luke's mum said I should have an abortion because he already had Blake. She now loves her so much and every room in her house has a picture of Mily and Blake in it.

I hope everything goes well for you and Emily. It's a hard road, but just know you're not alone.
If you want to email me, my address is [email protected]

Penny

Thanks for that Penny!
How often does Luke see Milly??? I'm letting Emily's dad see him whenever he likes, but i would prefer to start having some structure to visits, instead of him just turning up out of the blue!!!
Thanks for your well wishes, i hope that everything is going well for you and little Milly (i love that name!) its really nice being able to talk to people who know what im going through! other people are really supportive but still dont completly understand!

Amanda
Luke's seen Milly maybe a dozen or two times since she was born. He knows he can see her whenever, but he doesn't want to come to our house and we now refuse to travel to his house. We do tell him if he wants to see her he has to ring us. I've now stopped ringing him and wasting my money on him.

He normally rings and asks us to go to his mum's house (just round the corner) to see him. It's kind of netural territory and we both feel comfortable there.

I'll write more tomorrow.
Milly's overtired and now crying.
Penny

Just changing the subject for a minute........Penny that is so funny my name is Milli and my brother is Luke I couldnt believe it when I read that!

Sorry but I definatly know what all you guys are feeling, Im only 17 but concieved my baby girl and gave birth when i was 16! My partner wanted a baby and we discussed everything but after I had concieved he left before we even found out if I was pregnant once I knew I was pregnant I couldnt get in contact with him and 4 weeks later I finally talked to him he was with a new girl and i was left alone and pregnant!
If it wasnt for my family I dont know where we'd be! After Shantilli was born we spoke and he asked for pictures so I sent him some but the other thing he asked for was DNA testing, like I hadnt been thru enough! So I made a promise to myself that I would leave it for 12 mths to give him a chance to be a father under proper circumstances, I even moved back to the small town where his family lived for 6 months! But in this 6 months he never laid eyes on her and still hasnt! I had his mother slamed the door in my face and tell me to F off twice!
So a few days ago I finally got the confidence up to fight that son of a bitch (sorry) and we're just about to go thru DNA testing now!

But if ne of you ever want to talk I have msn my email is [email protected]

Milli Teen Mummy 2 Shantilli Memphius

You go girl!!!
I know what you're going through with the DNA testing, and my story is posted on "If he doesn't want to be a father now ..."
We had our DNA test done just over two weeks ago now, and we're still waiting. Was the first time my ex laid eyes on his son. I have no doubts as to who my son's dad is, and I think my ex would have seen the resemblance in Aidan too.
Ironically, my ex was the one who wanted the tests done in the first place, but when Aidan was born, he pretty much told me to bugger off when I asked him about it. So sadly, I had to go through the Family Court, and my ex had a visit from a court baliff before he finally agreed to have the test done.
So I've got my fingers crossed for you, and if you want to talk about it with someone, my email is [email protected] I'd be more than happy to help you through it.

Good luck, and keep in touch,

Love Ambs xx

Ambs, Mummy to Aidan (born March 04)

Gosh i'm so sorry to hear what you are going through!! you poor thing! it sounds as though shantillis father and his family are giving you a rough time!! its sad aye, they really have no clue on what they are missing out on!! you are very brave and it sounds like you are doing a great job as a mother!! if his family are being like that maybe its best if shantilli isn't around them till they shape up!!!
stay strong you are doing a great job!! and i hope that the DNA testing goes well for you smile
Sometimes males really frustrate me aye!!!
I'm always here if you need to chat smile

Amanda
Aww thanks you guys, its really sweet of you to say its ok to chat netime!

Im trying not to worry about it until he replys to the letter the lawyer sent him but I will definatly keep posting what is going on now I know you guys r interest! So he has 14 days to reply which is good coz that gets me over shantillis birthday!

THANK YOU

Love Milli

Milli Teen Mummy 2 Shantilli Memphius

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