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keeping dadin the pitchure? Rss

hi i have a nearly 7 month old daughter and broke up with my husband about 2 months and i am living out bush in south aust with my parents and he is in sydney. we are fighting half the time. he is a great father but i dont know how to make it easier for him to spend time with his daughter with the distance and the fighting. can anyone help with ideas.

sunshine, geraldton,serenity born 17/3/04

Hi Dove,

I dont know all about your situation but I will tell you about mine.

My husband has two young children to his ex partner. When she left him, she moved 9 hours away. It was hard for my husband to have contact due to work etc so he became angry. He could not understand how everything works for the mother. For example, the mother has automatic custody, the mother makes the decisions etc. My husband could not follow her due to work etc. It has been over 4 years and we are still fighting for fair contact through the courts.

Did you live in Sydney with your husband before the split? If so, have you thought about moving back?

I think you need to evaluate what is best for your child. I know that break ups are hard and you need your family around but your child needs Dad. If you husband doesn't seem to be making an effort and you want your child to see their father, you can lodge an application in Family Court for him to have contact.

I dont know if this has helped but as the wife of a father who doesn't see his children, I ask that you try and understand how the father feels having lost not only his wife but also his child.

Thanks

Mum to Samuel - 3 and Jordy - 22 months

hi Dove, send him pictures every month via the internet and interesting tidbits about what your daughter is doing, for example sitting by self, pulling up on furniture, walking, new teeth. weight, etc. keep the emails only about your daughter, this way he will open them and may respond.
if he does respond, print and keep with the rest of her baby stuff so she knows dad cared when she was little, it will help if things get strained when she is older. otherwise good luck and don't forget to take some time out for yourself

dee, NSW

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