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dad doesn't get involved Lock Rss

Hi everyone...
I have a 3 1/2 yr old girl and a 1 year old girl. When our second was born, my husband did take care of our first but he does it pretty much only from home.
Both my girls would not feed from anyone else but me when they were little so he said it was really hard to bond. Even on the weekends now, he will take our eldest to watch the local footy (when he is not playing that is), but not both. If we are having a relaxing day, this means no sport on, nothing on tv, or just nothing to do, he will not even go for walks or a park or even play in the back yard.
I know he works hard during the week but I feel he lacks in the "father/children relationship". He will usually hire a movie and tell them to be quiet or put them in another room with their own movie on.
I need some help on trying to change his ways as they both adore him when he does pay attention to them.

SOMEONE PLEASE GIVE ME SOME HELP!!!

Tania,Vic,2 girls 4 1/2 yrs & 22 month old

i can understand your frustration!
maybe you could make some tasks 'just for daddy'?
like bathtime or story before bed. things that only he does.
or, if he's not up for doing things everyday, have a set time on the weekend or even once a month where you children each have special 'daddy time' if they each have something that only they do with their daddy at this special time they will feel it is very important.
we did this with our dad almost from birth as he was out working most of the time and i know i felt it was a very special and valuable time with him.
i dont know if these ideas will work for your husband but i hope it helps!
mel

mel, ella jasmine 13/06/04 & benjamin tyler 6/8/06

Hi JaznMel,
I had the same problem with my partner
My partner works 6 nights a week from 7.30 pm to about 4am & then sleeps most of the day& then gets straight on the computer, so i do most things with our 2year old, When i asked my partner to be more involved in doing things with her he would always use the"im to tired excuse" I work part time & get tired myself,anyway we ended up having a big talk & i told him that on some sundays I would like him to take our daughter to one of those indoor play centres & do things with her like taking her to visit his parents etc, I would tell my daughter on the day that she was going with her daddy to the playground or visit her nan & pop so she would not let him forget about going or for him to make an excuse Hee Hee smile & they really injoy this time together.At first i was dropping all these hints about doing things with her but he still didn't get the message,so i just had to tell him straight
Hope this helps smile

ME25, DF28, DD 4, DS18 months

Hi everyone, im pretty new to parents exchange, I have a 7 month old boy, he's a great baby, im a single mum and just recently my son's father told me he didnt want to be apart of my sons life, he has never seen his son before and I dont understand why he has made the decision not to be apart of it, But was just curious if there are others out there who have been through the same thing before, and how they have dealt with the situation.
i think, maybe sugest for him to watch the movie later, when they have gone to bed.
I had the same issue with my other half. We talked it out, now he plays his x-box or watches tv when bubby is sleeping! he has plenty of time for everything, i think you just need to communicate. If he cant do that then tell him to grow up and show a little respect. Make him realise that when his kids disrespect him its only because they get it from him!

Good luck...

mumsgroup.tk -Kayden 31.1.05 & Tianah 25.8.06

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