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how do you know when you're ready to give up BF? This last week, i've just felt a little frustrated like i would rather her having a bottle

I can blame it on a few little things like me working 4 days last week so she had mainly EBM in a bottle, or the fact she is still biting me 2months since getting her bottom teeth and she has now cut her top ones, or the fact ive had flu and felt yuck.

I dont know if i want to give up yet but i need some tips on how to rekindle that loving feeling of me BF her lol
the reasons you listed sound like pretty good ones for wanting to stop!
i always feel like quitting when i get sick. who wants a baby hanging off you when you cant even breathe out your nose LOL

i dont really have tip on HOW to change the way you feel but just make sure you dont make any rash decisions. once you stop there's no going back so just try to look at it from that point. If you stop now, is there any chance of you regretting it later?
If unsure..keep doing it!
I would only stop when you can comfortably say "ive had enough"
The fact that you say you dont know if you want to give up tells me you aren't ready to do so!

Just try to remember that whatever she is doing like biting etc is only a phase and once you are feeling better you will probably have more patience.

thats right Em... i keep thinking i will regret it. Plus im known for saying "ive had enough" in the heat of the moment and giving up but then i change my mind quickly LOL. Im a shocker!!

I think because so much has happened lately im finding it hard to get back into the swing of things with the kids and i know deep down BF is the best thing for Layla and myself right now

And also i had a fever all day yesterday and last thing i wanted was a baby being attached to me when im sweating and half dying lol... she has high body temperature too and makes you sweat even more!

I was really hoping the biting would of stopped by now, its been 2months and ive done what the ABA and lactation consultants have told me to do with no luck. Its really frustrating and hurts like hell
Denae,

I think you just do.....doesn't help does it? LOL It's kinda like that feeling when you know, even when times are hard whether you really want to leave your other half; even if it's what you say you want......so for me it would be when the reasons to go outweigh the reasons to stay.

Apply that to bf terms, do the reasons why you do it still outweigh the "crap" times when you resent the fact you do it? I am over the moon to still be feeding Alex, that doesn't mean that I have loved it everyday since the day he was born; in fact his 4 month growth spurt springs to mind when I questioned my sanity not only for not ever giving him formula...but why I was bf at all. It was the severe sleep deprivation talking I think (he was feeding every 90 minutes if I was lucky, which meant he was only getting about an hour of sleep)but after about a week, when the craziness had passed I was so very proud of myself for not giving in. Even now, I have days where I wish I wasn't doing it, but I keep at it because we both love it and again, the reasons for doing it outweigh those that don't.

Have a read of this, it might put things in perspective. This one might have some tips about the biting situation.

Christina


thanks Christina smile Im having a look at the articles now!

For me, there is definately more pros then cons to BF Layla right now

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I might just be a little hormonal this week so you know how us women want to be left alone for 5mins lol

Plus its hot! Nothing worse then cuddling up to someone when its stinking hot and muggy
Hey Denae! I went through a stage of wanting to give up breastfeeding my daughters at around 8-9 months! However I always had in my mind that I wanted to feed my children for a minimum of 12 months and would love to feed until the age of 2 if we both decided that this was right for us! So when I started going through this phase it was very unsettling - not knowing how I should proceed!

I ended up just peservering for another few weeks and eventually these feelings passed....I am also wondering now if this was a hormonal aspect that came about with the return of my period! I ended up continuing to breastfeed my eldest daughter until she was 13 months when she made the decision to stop and my second daughter I fed until she was 21 months and I decided to wean her with a little persausion when I fell pregnant again and decided I wanted to have a break before No3 arrived! (who is now due any day!!!)

Looking back I am so glad that I continued feeding my girls! I have the same goals with my next child - and I think it's normal for any mothers to question once in a while where the are heading and whether or not they need a change! Biting is a difficult phase! My eldest daughter was a biter and tended to use me as a teether quiet regularly! lol I always fed my children as a comforter when they were upset or to settle them and I soon learnt from her not to do this - as this was generally when she decided to bite me!!! lol Have you noticed a pattern??? Aletha xx

Arianna, Reagan & Oakley

Hi Aletha

Thanks so much for your reply... how you described is how i'm feeling. I'm still hanging in there and BF her but i still don't have the same love for it as i did before.

I think of it more as a feed time, instead of a bonding time now. She gauges, and scratches my boobs and face and still bites.

Also doesn't help that i only planned to do it til 6months and now i've got there, i am thinking of when i want to stop. So i'm going to try and get to 8months and then see where i want to go from there

I really would of liked to have fed her til 12 months but it's getting hard!

Layla is a comfort sucker and still demand feeds so she feeds hourly to 2 hourly during the day which doesn't help when i need to get things done! I feel guilty for feeling like this!
Hi! Denae,

No problems at all! Breastfeeding is such a wonderful and worthwhile experience for you and your daughter! However it is also a very selfless and at times demanding period for a new mother or long term feeder! I couldn't count how many times I have been told "just to put her on a bottle" or "are you still feeding her".....You need to do what is best for you and your child!

My daughters were both still exclusively breastfed at 6 months - so for me they were still feeding every 2-3 hours. This obviously varied throughout different times of the day - as they tended to cluster feed in the afternoons before bedtimes and whilst my eldest slept through fairly early - I was still feeding my second once each night until she weaned (which is another reason why children tend to breastfeed longer as well - so I was happy to do this!)

Have you introduced anything else into her diet as yet?? If so - why don't you try dropping a feed - as I think it is better to keep breastfeeding her over a longer period then to stop all together and put her onto formula. If she is taking some farex - have you considered expressed breast milk with these feeds....or only offer a breastfeed after her lunch feed - when she should be pretty full already! This way you are trying to decrease some of the breastfeeds whilst introducing solids without involving nipple confusion etc involved with FF which may involve her quitting all together!

You definately shouldn't feel guilty! You have done an awesome job in breastfeeding her for so long already! You deserve such a big pat on the back! I think maybe you should just look at a new routine now that she is getting a little older that may suit both of you more! For example my eldest daughter - as I said weaned a lot earlier! She wasn't as attached to it as my second daughter and she just slowly decided herself as solids were introduced that it wasn't for her anymore! I think setting yourself monthly goals is a great idea! And will help you to continue your BF relationship for longer if that's what you decide! Chat soon Aletha xx

Arianna, Reagan & Oakley

I bf my DD1 for 18months when she self weaned, I am currently bfing my DD2 who is now 3yr4mth old. I think it is completely normal to have times when you feel more or less motivated to continue bfing, particularly when you are feeding an older baby/child. It is important to me that my DD2 has the opportunity to self wean (just as her sister did) and I am hoping that this will be sometime soon but I have happiliy relinqued control of this and leaving it in her hands. I still enjoy bfing (even if it is only once a day before bed), it is our special time together where we connect and I will miss feeding when she weans, but I know that providing her with the opportunity to self wean will enable her to be more independent in the future. Each mother and baby is different, so you need to make the decision to wean based on your own circumstances and the circumstances of your child - just be mindful that you should do this with a clear mind and with lots of thought.
Aletha, she's having one solid meal a day but some days shes not interested so i don't push it. But she doesn't feed any less... im putting it down to a growth spurt with how sooky she has been which means more comfort from me.

Just want to thank you all for the replies... we are still BF and i feel good about it again. I think it might of just been an off week! I've set myself a new goal, to BF until 8months and then see where i want to go from there smile

I definately don't want to give up yet and you girls have helped me get through my rough patch so thank you smile

hi again hun
love the new sig!
i just wanted to say how glad i am that you are feeling a bit better about bfing again.
i think 8 months sounds like a good goal and then re-evaluate from there.

good luck with it!
I agree with the other posts, you do have moments when you can't stand it sometimes.
I found dropping feeds helped me keep going.

DD1: 07/06/07

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