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Need BF support...NOW! Lock Rss

My new DD is only 1 1/2 weeks old. I had a very traumatic labour (as posted in labour stories) and I am not enjoying breastfeeding at all.

We had attachment and cracked nipple problems at the beginning and she lost more then 10% of her birth weight so we ended up giving her some formula. She now is pretty good and accepts both bottle and boob. But I am fidning I am resenting breastfeeding and my tummy flips everytime she wakes as I know what's coming.

I express several times a day so if I do give her a bottle she is still getting my milk but quite often she is getting topped up with formula.

I feel so so guilty about the thought of not wanting to do it. I have a lactation consultant coming tomorrow and in the meantime the poor thing is getting bottle fed most feeds and the boob maybe once or twice a day.

Last night we tried breastfeeding then once she was "finished" put her down. But then she cried and screamed on and off for hours and we tried not to give in to her with the bottle. Then by 3.30am we couldn't take it anymore so gave her a bottle of formula and she slept for 5 hours. I felt like such a bad mum.

I have read so many times that it does get better and easier but I really feel like this is not for me and think we will be a happier family if we bottle fed most of the time.

Thanks for letting me blab

x
Hi there!

I feel your pain!! My DS, who is now 5 months old, was breastfed for the first week of his life....however,

We had MAJOR attachment issues, my nipples were cracked, pinched, and bleeding the first day we BF...he lost well over 10% of his birthweight, but we were still determined to BF. Plus we were getting alot of pressure in the hospital to BF from the midwives etc...which is pretty normal.

The first night we had Zeke home, he woke for a feed every hour! He would feed for an hour, then sleep for 30 mins and want more...I was in tears all night - the only way I got any sleep was to have him in bed with me - I was also single at the time.

This went on and on for a week. I was DREADING him wanting a feed, I would be scared to feed him because it hurt so bad, and I'm sure he could sense my stress as well.

Anyways, a week later we had a midwife visit and he was weighed, and he had again lost more weight, his nappies were dry and he was severely dehydrated...so she suggested I put him on formula.

I gave the formula a try and I have never looked back...the satisfaction on DS's face when he had his first fill was awesome!

He has thrived on formula, he is now a very happy, very healthy 5 month old.

Don't feel bad if you decide to switch to formula!

Sometimes breast is not best!!

Good luck!
Hi there,
I understand your pain.
I didn't know what i was doing wrong with my first the midwifes were saying you are doing good but he still made clicking noises.
It takes time, practice and determination.
I watched a lot of videos and read a lot of books. I had a c-section so there was a special way to do it.
You and your baby need to learn from each other and do what is right for both.

I used a pillow at my side to raise baby up and feed him while is body was under my arm.and my hand cupping his head.
Its a wonderful natural beautiful thing to breastfeed and if i could do it all again i would.

its good you are expressing at least you keep your supply up.
they say if the nipple is in pain keep feeding on it, it will grow a second skin lol so to speak.

Look if you dont want to do it - dont do it. Why suffer with the stress. Your baby will sense the stress. Bottle feed with express milk is a great idea. But if it becomes to difficult just stick with formula.
If you have tried enough and it just isn;t happening - you tried that is the main thing.

take care.


My new DD is only 1 1/2 weeks old. I had a very traumatic labour (as posted in labour stories) and I am not enjoying breastfeeding at all.

We had attachment and cracked nipple problems at the beginning and she lost more then 10% of her birth weight so we ended up giving her some formula. She now is pretty good and accepts both bottle and boob. But I am fidning I am resenting breastfeeding and my tummy flips everytime she wakes as I know what's coming.

I express several times a day so if I do give her a bottle she is still getting my milk but quite often she is getting topped up with formula.

I feel so so guilty about the thought of not wanting to do it. I have a lactation consultant coming tomorrow and in the meantime the poor thing is getting bottle fed most feeds and the boob maybe once or twice a day.

Last night we tried breastfeeding then once she was "finished" put her down. But then she cried and screamed on and off for hours and we tried not to give in to her with the bottle. Then by 3.30am we couldn't take it anymore so gave her a bottle of formula and she slept for 5 hours. I felt like such a bad mum.

I have read so many times that it does get better and easier but I really feel like this is not for me and think we will be a happier family if we bottle fed most of the time.

Thanks for letting me blab

x

http://gustopaleo.com/



We had attachment and cracked nipple problems at the beginning
I express several times a day so if I do give her a bottle she is still getting my milk but quite often she is getting topped up with formula.

I feel so so guilty about the thought of not wanting to do it. I have a lactation consultant coming tomorrow and in the meantime the poor thing is getting bottle fed most feeds and the boob maybe once or twice a day.

Last night we tried breastfeeding then once she was "finished" put her down. But then she cried and screamed on and off for hours and we tried not to give in to her with the bottle. Then by 3.30am we couldn't take it anymore so gave her a bottle of formula and she slept for 5 hours. I felt like such a bad mum.

I have read so many times that it does get better and easier but I really feel like this is not for me and think we will be a happier family if we bottle fed most of the time.

Thanks for letting me blab

x


The decision is yours to continue bf or bottle feed.

Cracked nipples and learning to attach is normal/common. Expressing several times a day with already cracked nipples MAY be putting extra pressure on them, so to speak. If you are only feeding from the boob once or twice a day she may be preferring the bottle as its probably easier to get out out ie she doesn't have to work so hard for it. When you fed her last night snd she cried could it have been wind? Newborns feed every 3 or so hours so with her crying for hours she may have worked up quite an appetite!

My story? With DD1 and DD2 I was not a good milker (-: and they seemed to always want more so were topped up with formula. By 4 months they were both fully formula fed and I felt awful as I wanted to bf. With DD3 I persevered, no bottle, cracked bleeding nipples were treated straight away with Lanolin (sp?), checked for tongue tie for poor attachment, asking straight away for assistance from the lactation consultant and discovered that when I thought she was crying from hunger even after a feed, she actually had wind. Was this the problem with DD1 and DD2? Possibly. 12 months later I'm still feeding her. It was my choice to persevere. I could have formula feed her too.

Its your choice which way you go but you need to know you'll be happy with this choice. If you are wanting to bf you have started off well by asking the lactation consultant to come around so well done there. But you cannot beat yourself up over the decision.

All I can really say is good luck!

Hey, dont let anyone push you into breast feeding. If your not happy it is only going to stress you and bub. I have breast feed all of my children (i have 3 and another on the way). DS1 I only fed for a month because my milk wasn't strong enough and dr advised me he would be better on formula, I was feeding him every hour for about half hour. He would feed for half hour and then within an hour he was crying and hungary again. I just couldn't handle feeding him that often day and night and it was stressing us both out. As soon as he was on formula he was much more settled, we both slept better and it made a much happy house. If bub is happy on formula my advice is do what suits your family. But this doesn't mean if you have another bub in the future it will be the same. My daughter loved being breast fed and settle well with it and didn't go onto formula til she was about 6 months. Every baby is different and do what suits the baby
I also had a really traumatic labour 4 weeks ago and ended up with an emergency C-section. My DS had attachment problems from the beginning, but eventually started feeding with a nipple shield. Unfortunately, no one told me that I should have been expressing as well and my supply started dropping off. DS was only feeding every 4 hours and looked lethargic. The first week after we were discharged from the hospital he only put on 50g. I spoke to a lactation consultant who told me that I should have been expressing between feeds to keep my supply up. So off I went, bought an expensive electric breast pump and discovered that I was only able to express 50mls every 4 hours. So I started expressing every 2 hours and bottle feeding DS and after a couple of days my supply increased. The problem is that DS is now refusing to breast feed. When I try to get him to latch on he screams, kicks and scratches. I've been going to the breast feeding unit at my hospital but they're basically saying it's breast refusal and they're not really sure what else I can try (I've tried skin-to-skin, feeding him a small amount before trying to breast feed, trying to BF when he's sleeping, different positions etc).
To be honest BF is soooo much easier - no expressing, washing bottles, sterilising - and you get to bond with your child. There's nothing worse than trying to soothe your baby in the middle of the night whilst you're waiting for the bottle to warm up. And then after feeding you have to express and wash everything - the whole process takes over an hour.
If your DD is still attaching try and persevere with it - I know it's hard work but so much easier in the long run.
Firstly big hugs to you, you are doing a wonderful job! whatever you decide just remember you gaveher the best milk (colostrium wink ) so try not to feel guilty or preasured if you do decide to quit.

I think every new mum hits this same hard patch at around the same mark!!! for me with DD it was around the 2week mark i felt exactley how you have described but i perservered with alot of lanolin & feeding even though i dreaded feeding her and continued to do so untl she was 5 & half months smile im currently feeding DS who is 4months & hope to last past 6months with him smile I know you have probally heard this before but i can asure you IT DOES GET BETTER!!!! by about the 3week mark the worst of it is over, i promise!!! and the benifits are great plus it is so easy & convienient once you get past thoose hard weeks where you & bubs are both learning, within a few weeks your baby will be such a pro at it they can latch on with little to no assistance and your nipples go back to normal & doesnt hurt anymore either.

have you tried sheilds? are you using cream? perhaps try a different cream? before and after every feed try squirting a little milk onto your nipple and rub it around as its got alot of antibodies which will help the nipple to heal faster.
and if you have to co sleep to get some rest do it! i love co sleeping grin
Hey,
I know how you feel ... I also had a rough trot giving birth (ended up getting an emergency c section) & my milk didn't come in until day 6!! I was so close to giving up but it does get better...

I havnt read through the previous posts & I know that midwives don't recomend them but nipple sheilds saved my life (well, atleast my nipples)!! Also I use Lansinoh nipple cream, its great, heals quick & you don't have to rinse off... Also when my boobs get real sore I stick wet face washers in the freezer & then stick them in my bra...

Im now at the 3 week mark & things are going smoothly but the first 2 weeks were hell!! One thing thats saved me in co sleeping whilst feeding... It may not be for everyone but you sleep & busb falls asleep once their done!!

Goodluck & know that whatever decision you make- It's the right one!! smile
Don't feel bad because you feel you couldn't breast feed, I only lasted 5 days and I felt so guilty about it but mine were bleeding and it looked like a pus substance coming out of them and by day 4 my milk hadn't come in and DS was feeding every half an hour and we both were not sleeping and couldn't get anythin out of them even the mid wives tried expressing and got nothing DS was so hungry and we both were exhausted but the hospital made me keep going that it got to the stage I cried everytim he cried for food because it hurt soo much. I left hospital the next day full of resentment towards the midwives and feeding time. We continued feeding every half an hour, have 20 min sleep then feed again then 20 min sleep and so on (my milk had come in but it looked very watery) an by 2:30am the next morning I was so exhausted and upset I really just couldn't do it any more my dad made up a formula bottle and DS had a 5 hour sleep! He has had formula since then and I hav never looked back, I understand the breast is best for the baby but sometimes breast is not best for mum and when mum is upset an angry and resentful and tense baby will pick up on that and then the baby won be a happy little one at all.
If you do go formula full time just remember it may take a couple of weeks and a couple of formula tins to get it right for your bub so they don't get constipated or have pains in the belly etc.
Good luck smile
Hey big hugs, being a mum especially for the first time isnt easy, especially when you feel like your expected to do so much straight away... Like PP I agree it does get easier... My DD was really difficult at the start because she's tongue tie, I had the cracked and bleeding nipples and also got that awful feeling in my stomach every time she woke and I knew I had to feed her sad But I did persist and now she is almost three months old and Im still going. Have you tried the football hold? You can ask your lactation specialist about it tomorrow, that saved my life. DD latched on so much better that way and it became easier within days!!!

But dont feel like you have to BF everyone is different and every baby is different if bubs is more satisfied with formula do whatever it is that you need to do for you and your baby... stress will also not help your milk flow, if you stress you cant feed properly.

All the best its not easy, let us know how you go xxx
congrats on your new baby.

BF can be really hard at the start but you are doing the right thing getting help from a lactation consultant. Like others have said it takes a good 3-4 weeks to really get the hang of it and up until that point it can be exhausting and painful. All I can say is that if you really want to bf then just keep going and persevere, use lasinoh, get some nipple shields and keep in touch with the lactation consultant.

Set yourself some mini goals, eg make it to 1 month then 3 months etc. One piece of advice I was given which really helped me is that some days you will love it and others you will hate it. but once you get through this time it really can be very rewarding and gets really easy for you and your baby

good luck smile
I know how you're feeling hun.
People don't warn you anywhere near enough just how horrid the first two months are.

I haemmoraged after birth and ended up passing out twice. Kylara was born very limp and unresponsive. After she was given oxygen, she was put on my chest, but I couldn't get her to feed. She barely fed that day.
I spent four days in hospital, and the first three days I had every midwife telling me I was doing great and that Ky was feeding well.

By day two it was excruciating, but I kept going because no midwife questioned me and I kinda assumed it was meant to feel like that.
fourth day, a midwife walks in, takes one look and tells me I was doing it wrong.

I've had problems since, and I'm now using nipple shields.
I was using Avent ones, but when I went to the breastfeeding clinic the midwife freaked at how ripped up my nipples were, and told me to buy Medela brand. They are SO much more comfy.
Before I got shields, I did everything to put off feeding because I knew how much it was going to hurt. I almost felt physically ill.

Buy some disposable breast pads. I use the Coles brand ones. They work fine, Wet a couple and chuck them in the freezer (not saturated). They're great after feeding.
Buy some lanolin and apply it to the breast pad instead of your nipple.
Buy some Rite Aid Hydrogel Breast Disks.

Change breast pads after every feed, even if they're not wet.

And if it gets too much, put her down and walk away. Go into the next room and count to ten.
The more frustrated you become, the harder she'll be to deal with. Bub reacts to your emotions. Walk away, even if she's screaming, and settle your nerves.

Never try to put her on if she's screaming. Try to catch her just as she starts to stir, and put her on before she's fully awake. Or, tease her with the nipple (express a few drops) on her lower lip, and she should stop crying and open up
I made the mistake of thinking that any open mouth is good to feed with. But if she's crying, her tongue is at.the top of the mouth and won't be able to push against the nipple other right way, and she's more likely to chomp.
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