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Breast is ideal but not always best Lock Rss


You can't just give up after one night if you really want to BF, I think perhaps she had already made her decision to FF and there is nothing wrong with that at all smile

Agree 100%
Your situation sounds almost identical to the one I was in....and I switched to FF too. I still sometimes have pangs of guilt and failure...but I know, that at the time, for my sanity, I couldnt have kept up with BF. Sometimes I wish I had perserved but mostly I am happy with my decision. As a new mum I had NO IDEA how hard establishing BF was going to be. I like to think that when I have another baby that I will give it another go and hopefully next time be successful.
Do what's right for you. And if that's FF, then go for it. smile
Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement.
I agree it is not always easy to breast feed and I admire those that can stick to it.. My little Princess was losing weight and my heart was breaking at seeing her so distressed because she was hungry and her tummy was grumbling because she was so hungry... I could of persisted in trying with the breast and a part of me wishes that I did but the most part of me could not bare to see my little one so sad and hungry.
She is on the bottle now and thriving, I almost cried when I was watching Hubby give her the first bottle as I was so relieved that she was getting something in her little tummy.
Thanks again, you all offer so much great support and advice, I am def in the right place grin
BF with cracked and bleeding nipples can do more damage than good and can cause issues with the milk ducts.

I found that when i could not BF i used to express the milk (by hand as less painful) and use a teet that was closer to the shape and form of a nipple.

If you are BF and in pain this surely can't be a good expreience for you or the baby, and i think it is a really bad idea to persist the permanent damage could be long term.

The other benefits of feeding with a bottle formula or breast milk is you are able to monitor the babys intake.

Goodluck with whatever choice you make smile

Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement.
I agree it is not always easy to breast feed and I admire those that can stick to it.. My little Princess was losing weight and my heart was breaking at seeing her so distressed because she was hungry and her tummy was grumbling because she was so hungry... I could of persisted in trying with the breast and a part of me wishes that I did but the most part of me could not bare to see my little one so sad and hungry.
She is on the bottle now and thriving, I almost cried when I was watching Hubby give her the first bottle as I was so relieved that she was getting something in her little tummy.
Thanks again, you all offer so much great support and advice, I am def in the right place grin


Hi there,
Just letting you know ALL babies lose 10% of their body weight in the first few days. They put it back on again usually within a fortnight. The tummy grumbling is just the beginnings of their digestive system working. Its just getting cranked up! Your milk doesn't come in until usually somewhere between day 3 and 6, so the first few days are very small feeds but often. their little tummy is tiny.

Thank you all for your kind words and encouragement.
I agree it is not always easy to breast feed and I admire those that can stick to it.. My little Princess was losing weight and my heart was breaking at seeing her so distressed because she was hungry and her tummy was grumbling because she was so hungry... I could of persisted in trying with the breast and a part of me wishes that I did but the most part of me could not bare to see my little one so sad and hungry.
She is on the bottle now and thriving, I almost cried when I was watching Hubby give her the first bottle as I was so relieved that she was getting something in her little tummy.
Thanks again, you all offer so much great support and advice, I am def in the right place grin

hi you do realise that babies are supposed to lose weight for the first couple of weeks don't you.? Did anyone tell you that? some of their birth weight is fluid from being in the womb they lose that then start to build up again by week two get back to their birth weight! I really hope you have thought about this and its not to late to put her back on the boob

hi you do realise that babies are supposed to lose weight for the first couple of weeks don't you.? Did anyone tell you that? some of their birth weight is fluid from being in the womb they lose that then start to build up again by week two get back to their birth weight! I really hope you have thought about this and its not to late to put her back on the boob


She has said she made the right decision for her and her bubs. I think its easy for us to all sit here and say are you sure you have made the right decision its not too late etc, but in the end we are not the op and we are not there with her at 3am when he baby is screaming... I stopped bf when DD was 5 weeks because i hated it and it was the best thing i have done for me! you bf you bubs for the lenght of time your were comfy with and thats what was best for you =D

I think questioning the op like that when she has said she is happy with her decision can cause more issues ie: makng a new mum feel bad for not bf

1st baby due start of sep

I think that you will find that the people encouraging her or making suggestions about what is normal when you start bf or with new babies learning to bf and losing weight etc are doing so because they have all been in the same position before - they understand bf is hard because they have experienced it but through perseverance have continued to bf with success. Nothing is more satisfying than knowing you have really given it your best shot and feeling proud that you have given your baby the best start possible by bf - it really does take time, commitment and dedication but is worth it in the long run. IMO I guess to a lot of us 'encouraging' 4 days isn't long at all to give it a good go before giving up.
i really can't believe some of you!!!

twice now she has said that she feels like she made the right decision for her situation and yet there are still some of you persisting with the "are you sure you don't want to try again". don't you think she would of tried again if she wanted too? or if she really wanted to, given it another go?

i'm sure she knows that babies loose weight in the begining and repeatedly telling her so is patronising.

this is the reason why women feel like they are failures and are made to feel like they are bad mothers because others are second guessing her decision.

if you bf that's great but how about supporting other mothers that have made the choice not to rather than trying to convince her that it's better she bf.she didn't ask for encouragement or advice on how she can continue to bf she was saying that bf didn't work for her and she made the decision to ff, it doesn't matter if she came to that conclusion in 4 days, she feels it is the right one for her and baby.

The day i broke up with normal was the first day of my magical life...


i really can't believe some of you!!!

twice now she has said that she feels like she made the right decision for her situation and yet there are still some of you persisting with the "are you sure you don't want to try again". don't you think she would of though through this when making her decision? or if she really wanted to, given it another go?

i'm sure she knows that babies loose weight in the begining and repeatedly telling her so is patronising.

this is the reason why women feel like they are failures and are made to feel like they are bad mothers because others are second guessing her decision.

if you bf that's great but how about supporting other mothers that have hade the choice not to rather that trying to convince her that it's better she bf.

I think the title is misleading - breast is best. We're not talking about a mother who's been trying for weeks, or who's been feeding her bub every 2 hours for over an hour and who's now suffering from PND. Majority of first-time mums find BF hard initially - it's not as "natural" as it seems.
I think she had already made up her mind that she was gonna give her bub formula - and that's her choice. No one is judging her.
But then to say:

I just want to encourage anyone else who finds it too hard to breast feed to not be hard on yourself, your baby knows what it wants, listen to bub and listen to your body.

after just 4 days because it's "too hard" may be seen as encouraging other women who are having BF problems to just give up. BF is better for the bub - it's better for their digestive system, helps with bonding, helps with immunity, helps to prevent allergies and is more environmentally friendly.
If someone is having BF problems - there is plenty of support available: ABA, Breastfeeding Units, Lactation Consultants - and other mums willing to share their tips - which is what people have been trying to do on here.
This is not a BF vs FF debate. If someone says they're having problems BF and are disappointed about it - others will try to help. If they didn't want that help, why post in the first place? She doesn't have to justify herself to us. If she's happy FF good for her.
i also had probs with bubs i was in intense pain with cracked bleeding nipples but persisted for 9weeks it didnt get better for me but i would recommend giving it a go for longer than four days.
i know how hard it is i had a cs and bubs was feeding for over an hour at a time and would only sleep for 45mins then want another feed.
i am now glad i swapped to formula but would of preferred to bf for longer.
breast is def best but sometimes doesnt work out. i am sorry to say but 4days isnt long enough to get established and for many women it does get better.
[quote name='sugar&spice' date='22 November 2011 - 03:22 AM' timestamp='1321932134' post='3098991') i'm sure she knows that babies loose weight in the begining and repeatedly telling her so is patronising. this is the reason why women feel like they are failures and are made to feel like they are bad mothers because others are second guessing her decision. if you bf that's great but how about supporting other mothers that have made the choice not to rather than trying to convince her that it's better she bf.she didn't ask for encouragement or advice on how she can continue to bf she was saying that bf didn't work for her and she made the decision to ff, it doesn't matter if she came to that conclusion in 4 days, she feels it is the right one for her and baby. [/quote] Maybe she doesnt know that losing weight is normal. maybe she doesnt know anything about breastfeeding. How about you get that chip off your shoulder and actually read what the others have written. To the OP. like th others have said 4 days IS NOT ENOUGH TIME. you need to persevere. Breastfeeding doesnt just happen its a learnt thing by you and bubs. there are multiple places you can call for help. your husband buying formula in my opinion is not helpful in the slightest. sorry but a supportive husband/partner would have the aba on the phone step by stepping you through attachment and any other issues. A newborns stomach is the size of a marble- a teeny tiny marble. It needs to be filled reguarly and only with a tiny amount. It is not to late to put her back on the breast. just completely cut out the formula and over the next few days she will feed and feed until your milk starts meeting her requirements...

Apologies for my replies, hope they make sense. I am usually typing one handed or interrupted halfway through wink

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