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Frightened to Breastfeed Lock Rss

Try not to feel like a failure it's a learning curve for the both of you.
Im a mother to a 4 month old and i had trouble as well. We had a rough start to life and spent 3 1/2 weeks in Monash Hospital Melbourne. I couldn't feed my daughter for the first week and a bit of her life so my first experiance of breastfeeding was hand exspressing into a container, it was horrid. And then using a pump all the time to express milk so they coud feed her.
Finally after a week or so i was able to finally feed her myself, she attached great and was doing really well but i wasn't copeing. I was getting mastitis to because i was expressing and then feeding her normally, it was just to much stimulation i think, i ended up in hospital with server mastitis for 3 day's on a drip with antibiotics to help clear it up, and then oral antibiotics for a week after.
I admit i felt the same way you did, a failure, which wasn't helped with the nurses at the hospital telling me i wouldn't bond with my child if i didn't contnue to breast feed. I just couldn't i was so sore and she wasn't able to get what she needed so i made the choice to bottle feed, i felt guilty that i couldn't breast feed as well but it was best for both of us for me to stop, i couldn't be sick all the time there was no way i could of look after her then.
To be honest if i had another baby i would deffently try to breastfeed again. It's hard not to feel guilty when we cant provid this to our children because it's drilled into us so much that for some reason if you dont do it were bad mother's. I say Bullsh*t at least we had the sense to realise no this isn't working and my child need's nutrition, formula is the next best thing. I know it's easy to say but try not to feel guilty, try again with your son see how you go, and if it dosn't happen your still going to have a lovly happy baby, and you will be physically well to.
I know how you feel, I felt the same. I struggled with dd, fed her till 8 weeks but she had lost so much weight, looked unwell cried all the time and I was a mess- we just couldn't get it together and I still don't know why!

When I had ds, I went in with an open mind and we clicked. The bonus this time around is you know what to expect, you have experienced and you are probably a bit more relaxed as this is not your first baby smile

It doesn't have to be the same as last time, be prepared- you know it's challenging and all that so you can go in with half an idea smile what really helped me this time was Lansinoh - it is a lifesaver! Put it in your nipples after every feed- it heals the cracks etc.. By the next feed and takes away so much pain. The other thing that helped me this time was not timing feeds - I was hung up on watching the clock with dd, thinking she should be done by now if it was more than 20mins! With ds, I just follow his lead, he cried- I give him the breast for as long as he wants smile

Honestly, It could be totally different this time so keep an open mind, dont stress smile remember: lansinoh lol

And lastly, you're not a failure for using formula!! grin







hello I have been breast feeding for nine months and love it
I really didnt like it the first 4 months was hard lots of expressing and late nights but all worth it
i love it and dont want to stop yet! my advice it is ok to be scared I am too. When we have another baby I know what i am in for and yes it is hard work! less than 5 percent of mums succeed 6 months lateR!
ok my advice express every 4 hours or so right from when baby is born! it took me four days for my milk to come in! like fully in....as not much the first few days....we put baby on formula for a few weeks untill I got my supply up worked for us.
I breastfeed in the day and bottle at night because milk is always low at night! well mine was anyway!
if you express alot in the first few months you will get your milk supply up and have stores for the growth spurts ...usually six weeks and three months! hang in there you can do it dont feel like a failure because this time around may be very different! and you had to stop for reasons
some people say dont express as effects your supply yes it does if you express more than baby needs you will get excess!
and your milk is made at night so express all through the night if you want to increase supply will only take a week or so and your milk will be coming out bigtime!
TallulahBelle wrote:
I know how you feel, I felt the same. I struggled with dd, fed her till 8 weeks but she had lost so much weight, looked unwell cried all the time and I was a mess- we just couldn't get it together and I still don't know why!

When I had ds, I went in with an open mind and we clicked. The bonus this time around is you know what to expect, you have experienced and you are probably a bit more relaxed as this is not your first baby smile

It doesn't have to be the same as last time, be prepared- you know it's challenging and all that so you can go in with half an idea smile what really helped me this time was Lansinoh - it is a lifesaver! Put it in your nipples after every feed- it heals the cracks etc.. By the next feed and takes away so much pain. The other thing that helped me this time was not timing feeds - I was hung up on watching the clock with dd, thinking she should be done by now if it was more than 20mins! With ds, I just follow his lead, he cried- I give him the breast for as long as he wants smile

Honestly, It could be totally different this time so keep an open mind, dont stress smile remember: lansinoh lol

And lastly, you're not a failure for using formula!! grin


This was totally me all over with DS1! I was an absolute wreck over it, I mean what kind of mother can't nourish her own baby ( that's how I felt anyway). In hindsight the more I stressed the worse it probably made it.

When DS2 come along I was much more open minded. I went into it thinking I would do what I could to make BFing work but I was not going to stress myself out about it because that doesn't make for a happy mum or bub. So if it worked, great if not, it wasn't the end of the world. I truly believe that made all the difference. I BF DS2 until 9 months no problems at all.



I just hate how society has made mothers feel like failures if they don't breastfeed. I can't give you any advice, 18mths and I am still occasionally breastfeeding. Try to remain calm, avoid expressing at the early weeks (to avoid over stimulation), continue to massage your breasts during every shower and don't worry, thousands of babies live on formula from day 1, and they are fine.

Good luck.
Hi there

I was in a similar position to you, I was young when I had my first son and he would not latch on from day 1, they had to give him a bottle in hospital 48hrs after he was born because he hadn't gotten any milk from me. I expressed till he was 10weeks old and then he was fully formula fed from then on(he was only getting top ups of breast milk anyway as I wasn't producing much milk) I felt like a major failure!! I hate how midwives drill it into us that breastfeeding is the only way, we shouldn't be made to feel guilty and a failure if we don't succeed with breast feeding sad
When I was pregnant with ds2 I was worried I wouldn't be able to breast feed again but like pps I went into it with an open mind, fully relaxed and determined to try as hard as I could, as I did first time round, but I wasn't going to stress out and beat myself up if I couldn't do it!! I popped ds2 on the breast half an hr after he was born and he latched perfectly right away! He's now 14months old and still has one breastfeed a day when he wakes in the morning smile

Good luck and try not to worry, I truly think being relaxed second time round helped us to breast feed successfully smile
I had oversupply and got mastitis three times with DD. Second time around I thought it would be a breeze. Forgot the sensation of sucking on the nipple and had a tongue tied DS who worked at those nipples a little harder than his sister. The Rite Aid Hydro Discs were my saviour. They cooled the nipples and helped healing. Remember to lubricate! I also was pushy with the nurses.I knew my milk supply was too much with DS and asked for a pump as soon as I felt too much pressure on my breasts, they were very reluctant to give to me. Only got mastitis once with DS. DS and I were considered as freaks: my milk cam in 24 hrs after birth and he put on 120g in hospital.
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