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he says hes not ready Lock Rss

hi all,
i really need some advice my partner is 19 im 24 we have a ds 3mths we found out at 30 weeks we were both happy well so i thought now all we do is fight n he says he not ready to be a dad n wants to be out with friends n no time with us he has lost all interest in bubs as he will only hold him 4 a few min then put him down, i dont know what to do he says he still loves me but i broke it off as he doesnt show it. he stresses alot i know it would be hard 4 him but i feel i have no support i dont know what to do or say, im just sick of fighting n wish things could be different as i never thought this would happen.

anne,n.s.w, ds 4.3.06

hi there. Im sorry to hear what you are going through. It must break your heart. I was 18 (now 28) when I had my first child, and my partner (now husband) was 18 also. He didnt cope well at all. He too wanted to be out all the time with his mates, we constantly argued, I was heartbroken, that he didnt want the "family time" I craved.
It took a very long time, but eventually. we got there. We now have 5 children, a very strong marriage, and a very happy home. I think at that age, men find it very difficult to give up their freedom and be tied down, so to speak.
Also, you are the one who has carried this baby to term, and bonded before he was born. Maybe your partner is having a difficult time dealing with everything. Its one thing to accept the "idea" of something, but quite another to accept the real thing once it has arrived.
Im sure he loves you and your baby very much. Chin up, maybe he will come to his senses sooner rather than later when he realizes what hes missing.

3 boys, 2 girls

hi ethansmummy,

can i b a nosy parker and ask how come u didnt find out u were preg til 30 wks?

im not being rude thats just amaziong thats all.

i wish u all the best
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