Be comfortable in your skin – this is a judgement free zone. Find out more!

Huggies Forum

No friends? Rss

Has this happened to anyone else? im young and none of my other mates have babies and im the only one and now it seems that i have no mates now. no one comes to visit me or even ring to see how i am.
[Edited on 22/05/2007]

Hi Makaiden

I am having the exact same problem. No one is interested in talking to me & even if I do speak to one of my 'friends' they only ever ask about baby and how he is; never about me. A couple of weeks ago there was a bbq for a friends birthday which me, my husband and my bubby boy went to and no one even spoke to me. It's like as soon as you have a baby you become invisible. I didn't realise this was one of the side-effects of being a mum. Guess they can't have really been very good mates to start with hey...

one bubby boy 8 months

i found this too. i even had one friend that i was texting and i told her i was pregnant and didnt get a reply back.
Then she told me she lost my number. I mean wtf i have had the same number for the last 4 years.

So when i saw her at a friends 21st i said hi. but that was it.

My 21st is coming up and i sure as hell know who im NOT inviting.

But i also dont hear from as many ppl anymore. I must be boring now or something

hi,

yep this happened to me to. granted we also moved to another town but you would think they could atleast ring or send you a quick email. that said i now have two friends up here but they are all in their 30's and i'm only 23 so other than kids we don't have a lot in common. i know, be glad for the friends you do have but it would be nice to hear from some of the 'old' friends!

my niece has just had a bub (at 17) and has also found she has lost nearly all her friends - she now rings me nearly every day - haha i'm glad though - gives me a chance to speak to someone who says more than a few words!
i have the same problem. I had my baby girl 7 weeks early. Everyone came and visited me in the hospital, but she has been home for a month now, and nobody has even come past and seen her. I guess the novelty wears off for them after awhile.
I was also quite upset, coz i had planned my baby shower, but my daughter decided to come out beforehand, and my girlfriend of 20 years didn't end up coming to the baby shower. She texted me that day and told me she wasn't feeling well. Then when she rang the next week, i rubbed her nose in it and told how what a fantastic time we all had and that she missed out. She just turned around and said, that's okay, i just figured that i've already seen her, so i don't need to see her again!! How rude!! Most of my friends have pretty much disappeared now. I don't hear from them as often anymore, which is quite sad, considering i've known most of them for 20 or more years. But it is true, you find out who your real friends are when you have a baby.

Alana Michelle 15.3.07

I was 15 and in high school when I had my daughter.
Her dad left me before she was born and I had no friends.
I just started going along to playgroups and mums groups and made some really good friends.
When someone has a baby some people who dont have babies find it quite boring to have to sit around with someone and their baby all day, or having to drag this eating spewing pooping machine around everywhere.

Try and find groups, playgroups etc in your local community and go along. You'll find some really nice people in similar situations to make friends with.
The sad thing is I think once we have kids we sometimes out grow our old friends.

Where are you all located? Im in Adelaide...

Mummy to 3 little goblins

yep, all my friends stopped calling, and dropping in, i was just about to turn 21 & the only friend who came out to dinner at the surf club was a friend with a daughter I had met when I was pregnant, everyone else went to the clubs in Surfers Paradise 'for me' with my twin, and that was the last i have seen of them for nearly 2 yrs now.

xox stylish_seniorita

Jess 23, Pheonix 2!

I've had similar experiences and I'm 27. One of my friends stopped being my friend as soon as she knew I was pregnant because it made her feel uncomfortable about not having her life more together (bad job, no relationship etc etc) She would look at me and see I was happy and she couldn't relate anymore. I thought it was very self centred of her. Other friends who want to have kids have followed my progress into motherhood with fascination but at the end of the day my friends are now from mothers groups and other mums. It's like starting a new school you just drift away from your old friends and make new friends. It was hard at first because I miss my old mates but now I'm happy.
.
[Edited on 02/11/2008]
hi
i have the same problem the first week my son and i came home from the hospital all my mates were visiting everyday for the 1st week.Now its been 2months and not one of my friends have come to see me.They txt occasionaly just to ask how bub is doing thats bout it.Well i only have one close mate thats really there for me through thick and thin.So girl i sure do know how you feel and your not alone mwah.
hey dont worry, all my friends have babies and they still dont want to talk to me!!!! I hate feeling like they only talk to me because they 'have' to and now i don't bother anymore. Yeah but the ons that dont have babies never bother to invite us out cos they think we cant do anything with a baby
I was 26 when I had my first but all my friends were either single without kids or had gone back to work. I found it pretty lonely being home all day with a baby (thank god for Mum). I went to a few coffee groups and enjoyed the adult interaction. Later I joined playcentre (in NZ) and that was the best thing. I made lots of friends with Mums with kids of a similar age. I instantly had this great social network and support group. There were people I could drop in and have a coffee with or call on if I was sick and needed a play date organised so I could rest. They've probably become my main group of friends now. We just have more in common.
Sign in to follow this topic