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  5. How to comfort my older child with grandparent separation anxiety, Help!

How to comfort my older child with grandparent separation anxiety, Help! Lock Rss

I'm having a real issue with my 9 year old daughter, I know this is mainly a site for babies and toddlers but theres a lot of people here with some good ideas so I thought I'd pop in with my problem and see what help if any there is for me.

The story: A little less than a year ago we moved from the area where we have lived all our lives, where my parents live and where my child has grown up, so understandably she is quite close to my mum. We moved 6 hours away but have recently moved 3 hours closer. I homeschool so she isnt getting shuffled round schools or anything like that.

Well this week my mum has been staying with us for baby's first bday and my daughter has been so upset with the thought of my mum leaving, to the point of being distraught at 10 at night and not being able to sleep, just crying.
I have no idea what to do. I don't know what there is to say, nothing I seem to say makes any difference. I'm not a very sympathetic person when it is something that (to me) is not an issue, though I do see it is a big issue to my daughter so I wish I could help her, and just to realise it's not the end of the world as she knows (which is how she is acting).
I have acknowledged her feelings, but it's not enough for her, she just needs to process it in her head for herself to see that it will all be ok, because nothing any of us can say will fix it for her. (unless of course my mum came to live with us - but no thanks - Ive finally cut those apron strings - way past due)
My mum isn't dying, shes not going overseas, shes only a 3 hr drive away, a phone call, skype, email, txt etc, and we've seen her frequently since we moved, at least once every 2 months, and we will be again at Christmas even!
Hugging my daughter seems to be the only thing I can do, but when its 10 at night and she's being completely unreasonable not showing any signs of calming down I just end up feeling like I'm fighting a losing battle.
My mum leaves tomorrow and I have my first day back at a new job tomorrow night so I'm a bit worried about leaving her.
Has anyone got any advice or experience comforting an un-comfort-able, unreasonable child?

Weird issue I know, but have no idea what else I can do.
Can you make her a little calendar that she mark the days off until she sees her grandmother again? That way she can see when the day is coming and know how long it will be until she sees her again.

Do you think she's maybe feeling a bit upset due to her siblings first birthday too? Maybe feels a bit left out or that all the attentions on them for their birthday and this is her way of getting a little bit of attention or getting the bad feelings out?

Can your mum talk to her about it?

Poor little thing sad hopefully she'll be ok after your mum leaves. My mil lives interstate and my ds is always devastated when she goes home after visiting but is ok a day or two later smile
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