Huggies Forum

i have a question Lock Rss

It might seem a bit silly but its something i tend to wonder at bed time these days....

My DD was a rotten sleeper. The only thing that seemed to make any difference was for her to have the same routine, every night. Even now that she has just turned 3, she is still in a very "strict" bedtime routine. (through her want not mine) Every night we brush hair and teeth, read 1-3 stories depending on her behaviour, what time it is, and how long the books are, and then we have a cuddle and i sing her our little song before tucking her in and saying good night etc. It usually takes me about half an hour if i dont rush and i find the less i rush, the easier she is to get to bed without fuss.

My concern now that im pregnant is, what happens when there is a newborn/baby thrown into the mix? My DH usually isnt home at bedtime so its just me doing it and Im concerned about how to keep DDs bedtime a nice special time between us, if baby #2 is crying, wanting a feed etc etc

What did you find worked best for you? Did baby fall into a routine where they were asleep when you were putting your older child/ren to bed? Or did you have the help of a partner during this time of day?

I remember when DD was a baby from about 4pm-7pm she was absolutely HORRID so i cant imagine how i'll manage if thats the case with this next one.

Sorry if its a silly question but it seems valid at the moment to me LOL
Hi,
I remember about your DD's sleeping from when you were on this forum a long time ago.

About all I can suggest is to not worry about it right now, these things have a way of working out...and there's not really an option, life will go on! You may find your DD is happy to have a change in her routine once there's a new little sweetie on the scene, or you could take the baby into your DD's bed to listen to the stories etc.

In our house, I didn't always have help, but everyone just HAD to fit in around everyone else.

Hope that helps somewhat!
Fiona.
You might not want to hear this but to me it sounds like she has you wrapped around her little finger! It's up to you how you put her to bed but I wouldn't stand for that with my kids, bedtime is bedtime. We read and sing and tell stories etc but once I say it's time to go to sleep I mean it.

I was lucky that baby #2 was a really easy, settled baby so she would go down first without fuss, ds was unsettled from birth until I layed down the law when he got a little older. lol I would just take it as it comes and try not to think too much about it now.
Best word I ever learned was prioritize. You look after the one that needs the attention the quickest and the most.

It may seem like it is going to be hell, and for some time it may well be that way. When DD2 was born DD1 was 14 months old and got 6 teeth in the first month DD2 was home from the hospital. DD2 also didn't sleep at night which made things even more fun. But once I got past the8 weeks from hell i started to work itself out. Things will fall into place, it just may take a little time, and there will no doubt be some teething problems. Your DD will realise that there is another little person in the house that needs attention, and it may actually be just what she needs youknow.

Bestof luck smile
hi, our ds has a strict bedtime routine too. it is something he needs.

when dd was born she was also a very 'routine' baby right from the get go and lucky me, she loved to sleep.

i put ds sleeptime back 30 minutes once dd was born to 7.30 and i put dd to bed at 7. this gave me one on one time with ds and he would be in bet at 7.30. i read him a book and off he goes.

dd is 18 months now and this is pretty much still what we do.

although i didnt think about it too much back then, i do know now that it was a good thing to do. in the beginning all your time is taken up with the new bubs so it is good to set a time aside to make sure the eldest is doted on for a while.

routines are a must for me and my family smile
DH actually does the bedtime routine but he does it for both kids at once. All he did was simply add DS into the routine if he was awake - bath DS, bath DD, dress them both and take them into DD's room, read the story, put DD to bed, put DS to bed. atm DS is falling asleep just before storytime so he is put into his cot then DH and DD go and read their story. So far its working pretty well.

I figure that at least this is setting DS up to already be familiar with the bedtime routine and that, hopefully, it will help avoid some of the issues we had with DD's sleep.

Leisa.
Its a valid question and something I wondered too when pregnant with dd2.

I can tell you what we did if that's the sort of info you want, but in all honesty, you will just figure it out for yourself when the time comes, and you will manage both kids, because you have to. Some days will be rough, some will have you wondering how on earth that worked so easily.

Perhaps you could invest in a sling if you dont already have one, so that at least the new baby can be close to you or even feeding, when you're putting your dd to bed.

You've just got to trust in your ability as a mother - you can do it! grin

You might not want to hear this but to me it sounds like she has you wrapped around her little finger! It's up to you how you put her to bed but I wouldn't stand for that with my kids, bedtime is bedtime. We read and sing and tell stories etc but once I say it's time to go to sleep I mean it.

I was lucky that baby #2 was a really easy, settled baby so she would go down first without fuss, ds was unsettled from birth until I layed down the law when he got a little older. lol I would just take it as it comes and try not to think too much about it now.


thank you for all your replies.

and without trying to sound like im getting my nose out of joint, i dont think you have read my post correctly. I didnt say she wont go to bed. we just have a routine that we've had for a very long time and i am concerned about how to continue it without causing problems for her or the next baby. What about that makes you think she has me wrapped around her little finger?
Bedtime IS bedtime. However i put her to bed early enough that we CAN spend half an hour reading and singing etc because it is something that is comforting to her and helps her to go to bed without feeling like shes missed out on that part of the routine that shes so used to.
So im not sure what you mean with that comment but i dont think you know what you are talking about when it comes to my child and how i choose to put her to bed. And that wasnt really the question anyway.

hi, our ds has a strict bedtime routine too. it is something he needs.

when dd was born she was also a very 'routine' baby right from the get go and lucky me, she loved to sleep.

i put ds sleeptime back 30 minutes once dd was born to 7.30 and i put dd to bed at 7. this gave me one on one time with ds and he would be in bet at 7.30. i read him a book and off he goes.

dd is 18 months now and this is pretty much still what we do.

although i didnt think about it too much back then, i do know now that it was a good thing to do. in the beginning all your time is taken up with the new bubs so it is good to set a time aside to make sure the eldest is doted on for a while.

routines are a must for me and my family smile


this is how i feel. i dont want to give up that quality time we spend, and routine was the only thing that helped at all when i was going through absolute hell getting DD to sleep. (and anyone who has been around here long enough will remember the countless posts i made in tears because of the troubles we had) and i'd just like to make the transition as smooth for EVERYONE as possible.

THanks for the replies. Perhaps getting DH home by bed time would be a good place to start wink
Thats not a silly question!!

Firstly, congrats on your pregnancy, looking at your profile your kids will be almost 4 years apart is that right?

DS and DD are 4.5 years apart which helped me a lot. I do have DH at home for dinner and bed which is different from you but I just rolled with it. The first born was old enough to "wait" to a certain extent. For example, dinner would normally be at 5.30pm for DS, DH and I but with a newborn, this would never happen. Many nights were sandwiches or cereal and fruit and it eventually got easier until the baby was in more of a routine.

If it was me, I would start now, explaining about you having a baby in your belly and she is old enough to understand that one story is enough and it's her bedtime and your rest time. If your daughter is used to having a half hour one on one routine then maybe lessen it by 5 minutes each week and slowly make the changes. In saying that, it is hard for you because your DH isn't home but she will get the idea and independance soon enough!

Good luck and again, congrats smile

ooops forgot to mention your second baby may be different... they always are!

Hi there

I too read stories in bed to dd1, so I just took dd2 to bed at the same time and fed her while I read stories. So when dd2 was very little she basically went to bed at the same time, but now she is older she goes to sleep a little earlier. If she happens to be awake - I just read to her as well. But the others have given great advice - don't stress, you just take it all in your stride. The little ones will adapt.
xxx
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