I know what you mean smile DD1 didn't necessarily have a time routine or need the routine to go to bed without a fuss but I enjoyed spending the time with her one on one and having some mummy and daughter bonding time smile My DH worked nights in the first 3 or 4 months after DD2s arrival so it was pretty full on at bed time. I think someone else suggested it already but what I did (well tried really hard to do anyway lol) was to push DD1s bedtime back by a half an hour and got her to help me bath DD2 and pick out her clothes, sit with me while I gave her little sis a bottle etc etc and then we would put DD2 down together and then move on to her own special bedtime routine that was meant to be uninterrupted. Eventually it all worked out that way and the girls bedtimes are still a half an hour apart but in saying that, having to do it yourself is soooo hard and as you would well know -babies have a mind of their own and cooperation isn't always high on their list of priorities lol. I personally chose (not what is best for everyone or what everyone wants/needs) to stick with DD1s routine no matter what happened. If that meant that sometimes DD2 just had to sook in her cot for a little while then that was what happened. But if routine hadn't worked in our favour that night I would take DD2 with me and do what I had to do but tried not to obviously include her if that makes sense. For example, on the worst nights I remember sitting on DD1 bed and holding her book between my feet as I read to her and used my hands to feed DD2 her bottle. VERY difficult I can assure you lol. But I tried not to talk to DD2 or look at her etc as it was a special time for DD1 and I. It sounds mean but I guess everyone needs to learn that its not always about them and the earlier they learn it the better. In the end, DH had to quit night shift as I was getting no breaks. he was asleep all day and then gone all night and with a 2year old and a newborn it wasn't ideal. Like you said, maybe if you can get your DH to be home and help then it would be great but if not, you will be amazed at how industrious and fabulous of a mum you are because somehow it always seems to work out smile And I agree that thinking about it now is a good idea. You don't want to leave it to the last minute, realise you need to make some changes and then leave DD feeling as though its the babies fault that things are different. At least this way you can start implementing any plans and making any changes so she won't put the two together smile