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Feeling different towards 2nd born Lock Rss

Hi all! I dont know if any other mums went through this or im going insane!
So ive just had my DS 2 weeks ago. My DD is 6 now. I love them both! (Of course) but when i had my DD, i was absolutely smitten with her! I couldn't stop holding her, kissing her, i didnt leave her alone.
After having my DS, i love him! But not as crazy as i was with DD. I dont know if its because ive been there done that. Or if im older and wiser lol
I dont feel upset or sad. Im in noway neglecting him, i love him.. just not the way i remember how i felt when DD was a newborn.
Congratulations - and don't fret. I had four babies and I felt differently about them all in the first 6 weeks. There was really only one that I felt I bonded with straight away, and the others - my feelings were ambivalent at best. I would have given my right arm to save them if necessary, but I didn't really feel enthused I guess. I was tired, and sore and overwhelmed and those emotions took over for a while. I can say though, that around 6 weeks that all changed and the total in love feeling began.
My feelings at the beginning didn't change the outcome - so don't worry. Just get through each day and I am sure you will fall in love soon enough.
Hi dear. I vote normal! I'm the same way with my kids. My first daughter made me very emotional. I had time to be emotional though. I celebrated all of her firsts with gusto. She is a lot like me - anxious perfectionist, highly competitive, super high personal expectations. She was also a very fussy baby. Second daughter? I'm almost too busy to celebrate everything. We cuddle and do big birthday parties and I love and adore her - but she does not pull out that deep emotion from me. She was an extremely easy baby, too. However, it has evened out. They are 8 and 5 now. They're so incredibly different and I can appreciate that without comparing them. Would it be easier if I could pick and choose their traits? Yes! But it would not be as fun. It takes a little longer to form a bond with the second. Not only that, but I generally consider kids useless and impersonal lumps until around 18 months.

Hello my dear friend, thank you for sharing your experience with us and I hope you are doing well. I can understand your situation that you are not that much excited about your DS. It is always one of the most wonderful moments to become a mother for any lady. When you feel the pregnancy time for the first time, you always find it very precious and amazing moments. Your first kid will also be more special for you because you found happiness to become a mother for the first time at that time. You were too excited and too feeling full on the time of your first kid. When you got experience to become a mother, the feelings were not so strong for your second kid. I know that you love both of them equally but it’s all about the feeling of pregnancy. It is one of the common infusions that lady’s face with the second pregnancy. It is always normal that you were too excited about your first time and you were unable to leave your DD alone. Now you are at another phase of your life and you are already a mother and you know about all feelings. That excitement is not in your mind now and you are able to handle this situation with more calm. I also faced this issue during my second pregnancy and I felt all these changes in my life. I know that time changes everything and excitement are not there like your first kid. You should not take stress because of this problem because it is not any serious issue. Your feelings and excitement always change with second pregnancy so it is very common for most of the mothers.
Thank you so much for everyones reply!
Thank goodness I'm not the only one feeling like this, I really thought it was something else going on.
I feel 'normal' now! LOL
While I don't think it is strange to prefer one child over another you seem so polarized that the children almost sure to notice it early - kids are very sensitive to these things. This might damage the sibling relationship , and will probably hurt both of your children.


hey, it happened to all mums. it has been proved that first child gets more attention and love of others as compared to first one. This is not just your story. It’s a story of every house even every family. But a mom said that she never has a gap with respect to love with their child. but we think that we have. We got this feeling just because we were getting the second time. So all charm has gone away during the first time. As I am not having a child but my sister has. I can remember when her first baby born. She was too much excited even we were. She began to cry when she saw her first baby. because at first-time new hope, new life, new craze of everything. Those women I think too much lucky who gets their kids on the first attempt. They don’t have to wait for a long duration. As we are standing in a queue for getting treatment from a well-honored clinic.
Very normal. I've felt that and read a lot of stories of older people who preferred one kid slightly more than the other, even as they grew up. The follow up point was just don't make it obvious!
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