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Introducing baby routine without unsettling toddler too much Lock Rss

I am due any day now with No.2.
DS is just off 19 months old and has a good lunctime nap everyday and sleeps 12 hours at night.
He is such a lovely lovely little chap (yep I'm very biased) and I think he is going to love having a sibling, and I am keen to make sure that his life changes as little as possible.
I am keen to get the baby feeding regularly in the day, I didn't do this with DS, having no knowledge of routines and so leaving him to sleep for extended periods during the day, leading us to be up many many times in the night, and then around 3 months we started to get into a good routine. It took ages for my supply to establish as I wasn't feeding for long enough or regularly enough.
I don't want to go hard out on the routine front (I have contented little baby by Gina Ford, which is too hard for me, but good for guidance), but am keen to get feeding regularly and in turn sleeping.
So I'm thinking starting the babies day at the same time (ish) each day with morning feed, and then 3 hourly during the day and playing night time by ear, but I'm concerned about how DS routine will be affected, mainly I'm thinking breakfast and tea time, where this will probably clash with babies feeds. DS isn't able to completely feed himself with no help.
What did you do? Any advice on how to manage? DH will be around sometimes, but not all the time.
Any advice greatly appreciated. Thanks!! grin

Yep I would aim for feeding every 2 1/2 to 3 hours during the day. I dint wake mine at a certain time in the morning but just started my day from when they woke and working from there. For your older son it will be hard not to disrupt him a bit but I think if you keep his basic routine the same' ie nap time, bed Time. I used to make snacks and lunch for my ds1 in the morning that way I could easily grab it for him when I needed to and it was things he could feed himself such as sanwiches, chopped up veg and cheese.

Hi, just remember for the first couple of months its important to follow your babies lead. I totally get where you are coming from, but the only way to establish your supply and meet your babies new needs is to listen to bubs. Routines are useful, but not meant for younger babies. With the initial feeding, they may feed more then every 2 hours and when they change your milk supply - which they do often in the first few weeks they will also drink more frequently. I'm just saying you can't lock yourself into feeding times as helpful as it might seem at the moment. I know you don't want to disrupt your little mans routine and you don't really have to. But this is where extra support comes in. You need to support yourself to support your baby and in turn your little boy. Things like wearing a sling so you can carry bubs while doing stuff with your boy, reading to them together, feeding while doing other things. (you get good at this after a while) maybe if someone could come and help out so you can take the time you will need to establish your supply with your baby. Even though you have fed before - your new baby hasn't and will need to learn. You will also need to learn how to feed your new baby because amazingly enough it can be totally different! If you can get people to help out with meals and housework it will also make a big difference.

I think the most important thing is actually to relax rather then try and be on a routine so nobody is disrupted. Trying to make a baby fit into a routine before they are ready and trying to make sure nothing changes for a sibling is probably more stressful then going with the flow. Things probably will change for your little man, his life is going to be turned upsidedown, just like yours. The important thing is your attitude rather then making sure everything stays the same. By all means keep stuff as close as possible, I just mean if he starts to have different nap times or his routine is thrown out of whack, stay calm, hug them both, cuddle up in your bed - just chill. grin Things will be different, he will be ok and it will be ok.
Hey Little Egg, my DS was 18 months old when my DD was born so similar age gap to yours.

I agree with OC regarding the routine, newborns just don't need a routine because they just feed and sleep when they need to and you just have to play it by ear. In the early days DD was constantly feeding and I'd walk around with her in my arm whilst keeping an eye on DS. It was a bit challenging at first, however newborns do have lots of naps and can sleep anywhere. Once she got a bit older I fed her roughly every 2-3hrs and if I didn't she'd let me know smile
Your DS's routine will temporarily be disrupted and he will need to get used to having a baby in his life. It took my DS a couple of weeks before he got used to his sister, and being so young they just accept it. Funny enough, ever since she was born he's been having really long naps (2-3hrs) whereas before I was lucky if he slept an 1 hour.
As doublewhammy said, you could prepare some easy snacks for your DS to eat. If you have any family members or friends able to help with meals in the early days then take them up on it.
I found I had to stay 2 steps ahead for a while until we all got used to having the baby in our lives but I didn't find it too stressful and was actually much more relaxed because I'd done this before not so long ago. I was also lucky that I had plenty of milk and she was a good feeder. I hope this will be the case for you too.
Make sure you give your DS some one on one time when the baby sleeps and get him to help when you change nappies for instance so that he feels included.
I also worried about how we would make everything work but it turned out just fine. Yes, they do have their moments sometimes but you will be surprised by how well your DS will adjust.

All the best for a smooth and speedy delivery! smile
Ah thanks guys smile
Feeling a bit tearful about it all, but yep, I am just going to have to go with it, as long as we all get fed regularly we should be ok! smile
We don't have any family close by and have only lived here for a couple of years so, yep, not much support, but I have some meals in the freezer, and dh is great, so between us we should be ok smile
Thanks again, and I'll keep you posted, we are 40 weeks today and booked in for an induction on Monday so im really hoping baby makes an appearance this weekend

Good luck little egg hope you get to meet your new little one this wknd smile
wow you are so close!!

bit teary eh..... could be a good sign! grin

thinking of you and it will all be fine!
Hi little egg. Am off for the weekend but just wanted to say good luck. You'll do great and it'll all come together in time.
All the best! smile

Hey Guys smile
Just an update for those of you interested -
Nothing to report smile
We were booked to be induced this morning, but baby fluid and growth was ok, so have till Thursday when we have another scan and consult. Hopefully baby arrived by then! smile
Im just so glad we weren't induced over the weekend. We had a scan for fluids on Friday and they were ok, but it was with a different scan company, and it was supposed so just be for fluids, but she also did growth and measured babies stomach as the 3rd percentile, and then the dr we saw (not our usual consultant) wanted to induce us over the weekend, but I managed to persuade her to leave it till Monday. This morning we had another scan with our normal company (booked off our own backs as we wanted to be sure) and growth and fluid fine.
Crazy crazy, im so pleased we didn't go with what the dr wanted, I know she was only going off the information presented to her, but glad I listened my body and waited for our usual consultant.

Really good news little egg. Fingers crossed labour happens in the next day or two for you. So excited to hear the news. smile

good on you! how exciting!!!
can't wait to hear your good news - hope bubba comes soon!! smile
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