FEELING SAD, LONELY

HI LADIES, HOPE ALL IS WELL

CAME HOME FROM HOSPITAL YESTERDAY WITH 2ND BUB GABRIELLA ROSE BORN 11JAN..THIS IS MY 2ND AND AM NOT SURE THAT I SHOULD FEEL THIS WAY AGAIN..CANNOT STOP CRYING..I FEEL LONELY..WITH MY FIRST IT WAS THE SAME BUT I THOUGHT I WOULD BE BETTER THIS TIME AROUND..ITS LIKE HERE WE GO AGAIN..MY FIRST ISABELLA GRACE IS 16MTHS OLD AND TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE I HAVENT SEEN HER FOR 1 WEEK AS SHE HAS COME DOWN WITH SLAP CHEEK SYNDROME WHICH IS CONTAGIOUS, SO SHE HAS BEEN AT MY MUMS..I MISS HER LIKE CRAZY..AND FEEL LIKE MAYBE SHE HATES ME, OR FORGOTTEN ABOUT ME, OR DOESNT LOVE ME ANYMORE, SHE HASNT MET HER SISTER YET..BUT IM SCARED WHEN SHE DOES, WILL SHE BE JEALOUS, WILL SHE HATE ME..IM JUST SO SCARED AND FRUSTED AND CRYING ALL THE TIME. DONT KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT

HAVING A HARD TIME WITH NEW BUBS,BREASTFEEDING,CRYING/SETTLING, SLEEPING, ITS JUST ALL GETTING TO ME..WHENEVER SOMEONE RINGS AND ASKS HOW I AM THE CRYING STARTS, CAN ANYONE GIVE ME ADVICE?
HAS ANYONE GONE THROUGH THIS WITH 2ND BUB AND WITH YOUNG TODDLER AT HOME,, PLEASE HELP NEED SOME POSITIVES.

THANKS

Hey there,

I dont really have any advice for you as i dont have a toddler running around with a newborn. I just wanted to leave you a positive comment. I do however know what it feels like to feel lonely sometimes. I love my son to bits but somedays i feel like i cant cope. I do have a super supportive DH who helps out where he can (feeds, bedtime etc...) so that helps.

Cheer up sweetie and just enjoy your new arrival. Dont feel that your other DD hates you either. She is only young and wouldnt know hate anyway. She misses you like crazy though i bet. Congratualtions on your latest DD and take care.

hey hun
how are you feeling today ?
i have only the one little boy who is 2 and a half but i do remember the crying and sad stage i went through after the birth as im sure you remember with your first one too. remind yourself that your bodies hormones are all over the place and it is completly normal to be feeling this way. even tho you have been through it once and you think you would be able to deal with it 2nd time around, just remember thats its your hormones being all silly and that part is out of your control.
i had a horrible time after the birth and had the baby blues wich lasted way to long but as you know it all goes and sooner than later you will be feeling happy again and it will all be back to normal. don't be so hard on yourself.
as far as your first one hating you......nooooo not possible...ever. ever . ever. she loves you and adores you entirely. ring her and speak to her on the phone.
stay strong, newborns are hard work but so rewarding.
you are truly doing a great job ! ! ! !
all the best
danni

I have a nearly three year old girl and a ten week old girl and yes I still have that sad pit in my stomach. Its a yucky feeling that you just can't shake. You might be surprised at how your older child will react to the new baby. My older girls loves her baby sister but god help anyone trying to look at her or hold her "mummy hold the baby". Sometimes I get the baby had enough mummy time play with me. It does get easier. Soon they will be playing together and pay no attention to you at all. Give your oldest lots of hugs and kisses and attention when baby is asleep....And tell her youlove her all the time.

hi miabella,
Just thought i would reply to your message, dont worry things will pick up. I went through the same thing with my 2nd child crying for no reason what so ever just about any thing would make me cry. But then i joined a play group it helped me so much it gave me some thing to do rather than sit at home i meet some really nice mums who now have been my friends for 6 years. If you want you can email me back and have a chat.
rebecca

Hi Miabella,
Its terrible timing that your DD got slapcheek now, it will be better once she is home with you again.
My son was 14.5 months when I came home with DS2. I found because he was so young he didn't mind about me holding the baby all the time. At 16 months they are so busy playing and exploring that they don't want to be held anyway.
A tip is to make sure that you spend some one on one time with DD each day. It can be a story at bedtime or playing while your new bub is asleep, even just 10 mins will help you feel conected to her again.
If you continue to feel sad I think you should talk to your MCN or doctor as post natal depression is common and can be treated. Its important that you recognise it and ask for help.
If you want to talk to someone about feeding your newborn try ringing the ABA helpline, I have and the counsellors are fantastic.
BREASTFEEDING HELPLINES
ACT/Southern New South Wales (02) 6258 8928
New South Wales (02) 8853 4999
Queensland (07) 3844 8977 or (07) 3844 8166
Townsville (07) 4723 5566
Cairns (07) 4058 0007
Toowoomba (07) 4639 2401
South Australia and NT (08) 8411 0050
Northern Territory counsellor contact line (08) 8411 0301
Tasmania (03) 6223 2609
Tasmania - North (03) 6331 2799
Victoria (03) 9885 0653
Western Australia (08) 9340 1200

Hope you feel better soon
Jenny

don't forget all your hormones are going back into place...
when your friends ring. or anybody comes to visit if they ask what they can do tell them get them to hold the baby while you have a shower or bath.

i spent a month in hospital with my second my first is 6years. don't forget that children love their mums no matter what.

my 6 year old gave my 3 week old baby slap cheek and we had an helicoptor ride to hospital which was two hours away by car. be glad your mum has you first born.