Hi Ethans mummy
It doesnt matter what age men are when they first become a dad it is a scary process for men. I know it is scary for us as well but we are mum and our maternal instinct kicks in naturally as it doesnt for men. I think you would find if your partner was very honest with you he would tell you he is scared to death! it is hard for women when they first have there babies as they have so much change ahead of them with hormones and the right way to go about raising your child that i also think we can leave our realationships on the back burner a bit and it comes very much about you and the baby. I am a mum for the first time as well and i have had to sit my husband down and tell him what i expect of him, but dont forget you also need to know what he expects of you it goes both ways. Maybe you could encourage him to bath Ethan and get involved with him in others ways that doesnt concern mum and encourage him to be part of not only his life but yours as well. The parent help line maybe able to recommend a Fatherhood seminar in your area that you may be able to get him to go to so he can understand a bit more about his role as a dad. You are both so young still but that does not mean you cannot hold a mature response to the situation. Maybe get involved in your area in a parent class yourself or play group so you have the support from other mums, it think you will find mums are only to happy to help a single mum out in need. If you lived in Adelaide where i am i could show you a great playgroup that i go too. There is no need to do this on your own even if the things dont work out between you and your partner, dont isolate yourself you will be suprised how many people will put there hand up to help. Sweety i bet you are also making an awesome mum and you should be proud of the efforts that you have done so far. Remember to give yourself a pat on the back every so often, i had to train my partner, with alot of arguments in between so i think it is necessary to fight to a certain degree to understand what each others expectations are, also it is good to remember what bought you guys together in the first place and try to do those things again that bought you together. How you called each other for hours and laughed. Maybe have your son baby sat for a few hours or so and go on a date with him to get you out of the house without your son and just talk about stuff, like you probably did in the beginning.
It wont be like this forever keep your head up and make some time so you guys can talk CALMLY and list what your expectations are over the next fortnight or so of each other and work from there.
Sometimes us women have to take charge to help our men out, but also make him accountable for his actions, make him realise what he will going without if he doesnt listen to you.
Hope this is helpful to you. Let me know how you go. My email address is [email protected]
if you want a further ear to hear
Love Ashers mum. Goodluck