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Male midwife says... Lock Rss

Hi all,

I just read a bit of a news story about something a male midwife said in the UK. Knowing that we have all (or are about to) go through labour, I wanted to hear your thoughts (but I can guess what you ladies will all say)...

He said, "women should just toughen up and deal with the pain of labour and stop asking for a epidural which really just takes away from the journey and lessens the bond between mother and baby"


OMG!!!! Let's see him do it, hey!

I thought it was a female midwife? I partially agree with him tho...not to toughen up tho...thats a bit rude. I think there are times when epidurals are needed like after a very long labour like 20 hours or more or other situtations of that nature. This post is gonna cause a stir lol.

i think when a male can actually experience labour, then he can comment on it. This was touched upon in general too...
I'm another one that does sort of agree with him, I do think that alot of the time women jump straight for drugs when they aren't really needed, more the anticipation of the pain than the pain itself kwim..

Pfffft......If you break your leg, they give you pethidine so why does everyone have an opinion on something which is arguably one of if not the most painful things we will experience! Labour is as individual as DNA, we cannot know what someone else is experiencing unless we experience their exact same labour - why are people so opinionated about women having pain relief? I just dont get it. I say if you can go natural then good for you, if you ask for drugs then good for you. I have had a natural labour and a labour with all the drugs - I did what I could to get my baby out, I bonded with both boys just fine thank you Mr Midwife - good day to you Sir.

Christopher 08/10/05 William 30/12/08

i saw this report on the news and thats not what he meant..its all been jumbled up...he said that with epidrurals there can be so many further complications and interventions required aftyer having one...he thinks they're great when required but should not be useed all the time

also to pp...breaking your leg is a negative situation with no positive outcome..i dont think you can compare that to childbirth

My beautiful baby boy was born 24 June

from what ive heard Elyse (the pp) is right, the media have jumbled up what he has said. he mentioned that there's a place for epidurals and pain relief in child birth if need be.

Heidi 3 years & Annika 4 days

I too sort of agree with him with the bond thing because when I had my son it seemed so unreal that i'ld actually given birth because my epidural was so good i almost feel asleep that I feel I had some bonding problems and sometimes would almost question if this was all real. But I don't know how I would have done it with an epidural because I was induced and needed a vontruce at the end because bubs heart beat was dropping so I agree I'ld like to see him do it with out that option there if you need it. I think most of us that have epidurals get to the point before hand where we just feel like where going to dye from the ongoing pain expecailly if your induced and have contraction ontop of contraction with no break like I did.
After talking to my husband about what I read, we decided that obvioulsy the media has just taken the bits that will make a good story and left out the actual whole story. As other mums have said from this post, the whole "women should toughen up" was taken way out of context. Although mu hubby was joking about mylabour and telling me to 'toughen up', I doubt there is ANY male out there who thinks labour is easy and women are weak if they have drugs. I bet all men are REALLY glad that they are not the ones to go through labour. I also bet most, if not all, women are glad, deep down, that they are the ones who get to experience the amazing joy of childbirth. We are so very, very lucky to be priveleged enough to bring a life into this world! Well done, mums and mums-to-be. We are awesome!

Posted by: rissanddan
I also bet most, if not all, women are glad, deep down, that they are the ones who get to experience the amazing joy of childbirth. We are so very, very lucky to be priveleged enough to bring a life into this world!

lol, hell no! I would quite happily hand that 'special' experience over to men anyday.
Even though I am only just about to give birth to my first child and have no idea how much pain I'm really going to be in, I agree with him - I think epidurals have their place when needed for a medical reason. Not just for a smooth ride. I also think that caseareans should not be optional - only conducted for a medical reason.
Honestly we always talk about how its a womens right as to how she give births to her own baby.
If a women wants pain relief then she should have it, if she doesnt then she doesnt have to.
What is the big deal???

I get so sick and tired of people saying to me
'oh have an epidural'
'noo dont have an epidural'
Who cares! Im going to go in with an open mind, if im coping then i wont have one. If im not, i will have one!

As for the pain. Yes birth is positive, it isnt like a fractured limb BUT pain itself is not positive.
Pain is a 'self protection' mechanism - this really is the only use for it. We dont need to 'protect' ourselves from labour, so whats the problem in hiding the pain?

Pain as i said is NOT positive, labour is positive. Although they associate with eachother, it is NOT the same thing. Therefore saying 'oh labour is a positive pain therefore you dont need analgesia' is crap!

pain is bad because:

-it increases the metabolic demand which reduces our ability to heal

- reduces our immune function - make us susceptible to infections

- causes stress which isnt good for cardio vascular circulation

- reduced capacity to ventilate (ie breath normally)

- it hurts!!!

A c-section is painful and no-one would dare do a caesar without pain meds. But isnt a c-section a positive thing because you end up with a baby in your arms, the same as you would with labour?
Pain isnt good, regardless of where and how it comes about.
If one chooses to 'mask' this pain, then that right should be carried out AND respected!

good luck labouring girlies =)


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