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  5. Scared of Labour - 1st bub due 24 jan 05

Scared of Labour - 1st bub due 24 jan 05 Rss

Hi to u all,

u will probably see a great deal of me on the forum as I am absolutely petrified of labour and not be able to handle it.

I am on antidepressants for anxiety before falling pregnant.

I also have a real problem with the weight gain and body changes.... I have had a dream pregnancy no morning sickness, just tiredeness of which for someone so active as I am, I find very hard to deal with.

I ride dressage and my last ride was 2 weeks ago, i thought i had better not push my luck... I am 23 weeks now..

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Thanks Deb

Debra, Expecting 24Jan05

im due jan 7th and i've been told that labour is the easy part. im terrified of pain and have a big thing about needles. i had nasty morning sickness and that really got my upset but i find that spoiling myself rotten helps. i used to ride as well but i stopped a couple of years ago but i had a friend who kept riding while preggers and she was fine. she just did really easy things nothing above a walk and never went out by herself. she was fine and so was bubz. all i can say is try to relax and do heaps of reading.
good luck

natasha jayde - 1-1-05 ttc #2 end ong this year

Hi Deb

My strategy to not scare myself about labour was to try not to think about it (harder than it sounds). Other things I told myself was:-

- it is only one (maybe two days) in my life and the end product is so rewarding;
- there is always pain relief if you need it. I didn't find I needed an epidural but I have heard with them you feel no pain.

By the time you get to about 35 weeks you will be so over being pregnant, unable to sleep and just so excited to meet your little bub you will be wishing you could hurry up and go into labour. Personally I found it not to be as bad as I imagined and as soon as Ryan was born there was no pain at all just the most indescribable joy.

I was very active before my labour and and continued to do so during my pregnancy except in a reduced form of course. I went for a walk every day (instead of aerobics) and continued doing yoga. I think this helped with an easy pregnancy, labour and quick recovery so I would encourage you to keep as active as possible if you have always done so cause this will really help. I found keeping active actually helped combat the tiredness

Try not to stress too much and just focus on that little baby you will have at the end ...

All the best

Ryan (2) & Jayden (18mths)

Hi Deb,

I am due with my 1st in just over 2 wks (yippee! 38wks & over it now!) but I also worry about the pain - my pain tolerance is very low which does not help, but I figure that is also a mind thing to work on.
I have the same thoughts as Jo - its only a short time in your life & the end result will be worth it & the pain relief is there if you feel you need it.
I have also had a good pregnancy - no morning sickness - just a bit of nausea & healthy with just some minor "irritations".
I have not had the horror stories most people say they are told, but everyone does tell me the same thing "its a pain you cant describe & you forget it as soon as its over & baby is in your arms".
I havent even come up with a birth plan - I did start, but I figure as you dont know what will happen anyway - although I do know what I would & would not like - I have not experienced it before so how can I decide right now? I just plan to go with it and make the decisions as it happens & try to stay positive until the time arrives. smile

Good luck, Arna

Arna & Paije (29/09/04)

Hi Deb

There is no doubt that labour is a painful experience - I had an excrutiating 2 day labour that ended in a c section but I have forgotton how bad the pain was (I also ended up having an epidural).

It is true that you forget the pain after a while, I am not sure why this is? Perhaps it is so we will go on to have more children one day!

I know someone with an anxiety problem who was on anti depressants so I have a bit of an idea what you might be like when thinking about labour. Perhaps you might feel better knowing that there is very effective pain relief available to enable you to have a pain free labour (or near to it).

If I were in your position I would discuss it with my doctor and see what he/she suggests are the options for someone who suffers with anxiety.

Good Luck

4 lovely munchkins DD 10/03, DD 03/05, DS 10/06 &

I'm pregnant with my second (6 weeks) and it does hurt, but as soon as you hold that baby in your arms you for get the pain I think my surport people remember the pain more than I do, I'm doing it again so it can't be too bad and I don't like pain much either! Just try and relax make the most of the time you have to relax!
Good luck!!

Karen,NZ, 5 yr old girl & 2 yr old boy

Hi Deb,

I am pregnant with my third and I have had a drug pain free birth and a non drug birth. Both have some pain related to them, but there are plenty of alternatives to drugs and there are the drugs as well if you want to use them all.

A couple of suggestions that I have if this helps, is too think of things that help you relax. I had the ocean music playing in my labours. Also I made a saying a put it in the birth suite, so that when I was in pain and going through a contraction I could focus on the music and my saying. My first saying was "I will be meeting my child soon. " My second saying was "I will hold my baby in my arms soon." They are only little sayings but having them in the room where I could see them helped me focus on the the important part and not the painful part of going through labour.

Anyway good luck I hope all goes well for you and try and find things that you can focus on and help take your mind away from the pain.


QLD DD 2/02 DD 3/03 DD 2/05 Jack 23/3/07

Hi Deb,

I am currently pregnant with my 7th baby. When I was due with my 1st I was a lot like you. I was absolutely petrified. I was worried I would actually die from the pain. I kept saying to my mum, "what if I can't handle the pain." All she said to me was "do you think if it was that bad, we would ever go back and have any more babies?" and "as soon as that little baby is in your arms, you will forget the pain"

Well, I'm not going to lie to you. It is painful but it is also true that the minute that little bundle is placed in your arms, you forget all about the pain. And well, I'm going back for my 7th time, so that must tell you something.

I haven't always had easy births. I have had two babies with no drugs. I had pethadine for my first (which I didn't like) and used the gas for my others.

Are you going to ante natel classes or have you booked in yet? There you will learn how to use the gas effectively, and you will learn breathing techniques. I mostly use breathing and focusing to get me through my labours.

Try not to worry, it's definately worth it.

Hi to u all for the support from your posts. I really appreciate it.

To all of you I hope everything goes well for you all.

Sorry I would have loved to have posted back to each of you, but I don't have a lot of time. As I am the Director of my own web design company....

I haven't attended pre-natal classes as yet. Though I have been present with 2 births. And have 2 sisters which have both had bubs. I will now on your advice enrol to go to pre-natal classes. ( It can't hurt to find out everything possible).

Again thanks for all you help, talk soon.

Lovely to have met a really great bunch of ladies.


Debra, Expecting 24Jan05

Hi Holz,

Nice to hear from you. Well what can I say, the needle issue.Up until 5 years ago (i am now 31) I was the same. Absolutely petrified of needles. I ended up really sick with Candida (Thrush in you gut).. I felt so sick that I was looking forward to a blood test to find out what the hell was wrong.

I use to wish I could just faint so that they could still give me a needle and I wouldn't know about it.

You build up this fear of needles in your head. I will say from the bottom of my heart, needles are not that bad. I could sit up right now and have blood taken and not even feel it.

I ran away from my school when i was 15yrs old as they were doing the rubella vaccinations. I was waiting in line and just freaked and I ran and ran. And got out of having it. Though I had to live the humiliation down. That was the worst.

I also had a flu shot 2 year ago and never honestly felt it. What I do is scratch myself before and during the injection. That way all your sensation goes to the point that you are scratching...and so does your concentration. IT WORKS!!. I can't remember where or who told me but it works. So please don't be scared of needles. Having said that though I am petrified of drips in the top of my hand. This comes from my experience as a child with surgery etc. I can't even have someone touch the top of my hand without gagging. But I find them a different ball game, as they are ongoing..

Horseriding well, the biggest prob is if you come off/ fall off. Even walking is a bit risky if they shy etc. I have never come off my cleveland bay, though having said this there is always that chance. Besides he has never been turned out. I am still lunging 1-2 times a week to keep him supple enough.

My heart goes out to you with the morning sickness, you poor thing. Now that I don't think I could have handled.

Ok betta go

Talk soon


Debra, Expecting 24Jan05

Hi to all,

I was really scared when I was due to have my son, I had an induced labour (was over 5 days of due date), so I was only in labour for four hours.

The worst part of labour is contractions, the pushing is easy. I had no drugs and no stiches etc, and I swear having my mum there and a really good midwife helped me get through labour.

Needles are the easy bit, think of all the blood test you have had, no different to that, just don't look at the needle.

Everyone has a different experience and some may think pushing is the hardest bit.

You just have to keep in your mind what the end result is, that is the best part. I was so overwhelmed when my son was born, I didn't realise the afterbirth was removed!!!

Hope this has helped.
Hi Deb,
Firstly I was absoultly *#$# Scared and I really didnt want it to happen! I went 11 days over so by than I couldnt wait! I was induced on the 11th day and my labour went for 12 hours. I had a great midwife that stayed with me over her shift she helped me alot! Also with having my mum there and fiance was great. Just having people there to support you is the best thing I think, make sure you are comfortable with them as they do see everything! And guess what you pretty much forget everything that just happened when you have your baby in your arms! It was my first child and I did have a rough labour but I wont scare you more because even after that I would do it all over again. Dont take everyone elses theorys and storys to heart, as your birth will be different! Just a quick example doctors told me I was having a 6 pound baby maybe smaller, i had a 7 pound 6oz. Also I got to told in my exam I was going have be cut! not even slightly no stiches at all, not even a tear!
So Good Luck you will do fine! Just rest up now as you will need all the energy you can get!

Mummy to 3 Boys

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