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loss how to deal with Rss

hi all i unfortunatly suffered a m/c yesterday at ten weeks and i was just wondering if anyone else who has suffered a m/c has seen the bub as i did and i think im still in shock, and also how long do i have to wait before we can try again (i didnt need a d&c) my doctor didnt want to discuss it today as i am still in shock any advice please thank you

I am so sorry for your loss, its a very hard thing to deal with and it is a big big shock.

I lost my 2nd baby at 21 weeks back in August, she was due Xmas Day and I'm still grappling with it and desperate to get pregnant again.

As far as I know you can start trying as soon as you feel ready.

I wish I could say more to ease your pain, again I'm so sorry for your loss.


I suffered a m/c on the weekend myself. I also got to see my baby,as i had to give birth to it.I was 16 weeks pregnant, but bubs supposidly measured 13 weeks on the scan.
I wanted to see the baby,even tho the doctors didnt offer me the choice. i felt stupid for asking, but im glad i did. I got to see my little angel one final time.

If you are anything like me (after my first m/c back in 04')-you will probably just wanna start trying to fall pregnant again straight away ,right?
Don't worry, no one will think you are trying to replace the one u lost.
I think its completely natural to want to be pregnant again. Its so unfair, to have that ripped away from us so suddenly, after we've had so long to get our hopes up,and our bodies ready to carry a baby.

I was told (back then)-to wait untill after your first period to try, coz it means everything is working normally,and your uterus should be healthy enuff to do its thing.
On the other hand, it depends on your situation too. how many kids you have already had b4 etc.

In my situation, i would be better off waiting a year to try again. My body has just been thru so much the past 4 years. m/c in 04, c-sec in 05,and c-sec in 06.then m/c this year.

I really am sorry for your loss, i am in the same boat. It sucks its not fair and it SUCKS!!!

i hope u manage to concieve again soon,and manage to deal with all thats happened the best way u can.


thanks my doctor rang before and let me know once ive had my first period i can try again as my ultrasound today showed the placenta had been dispelled already and that my uterus is back to normal size ive only got the one dd who is helping me immensely by giving me kisses and cuddles and destroying everything thing in sight plus my partner who is amazing has been given a week off from work to help me (with pay) we will probably try again soon, the thing which will be the hardest to deal with is the fact my sister is currently pregnant and she was due a week before me so im not sure how i will cope with that but i'll try my best
I had a m/c 6 weeks ago at 6 weeks. I had my first AF after m/c 2 weeks later. It was a coincidence but we BD'd on day 14 of this cycle so there is a chance I could get a BFP this month. Don't know how long my cycle is now though so maybe not. There is a tiny part of me that hopes I get a BFN this month. We've been on holidays for the past 10 days and I have drunk quite a bit of alcohol so I would almost prefer not to fall this month.
As for having a look at the baby, when I m/c I had to look at it because it fell off my pad onto the floor (sorry, TMI) so I had to pick it up. It took all my inner strength to pick it up off the floor. It was one of the hardest things I have had to do ever. It just looked like a big blood clot but I knew that it would have been my baby. I am glad that I looked at it, even though it did not look anything like a baby. I don't think I'll ever get over having had a m/c but I am hoping to get that BFP sooner rather than later. My youngest is turning 3 in February so I don't want him to be too much older before #03 arrives. Here's to a BFP for Christmas. Merry Christmas and baby dust to all who are trying.

At 13 weeks (or so iv been told)- our baby looked like an actual baby.Skin wasnt transparant. eyes were in front of head.It measured about the size of my palm,from head to tiny little feet.
I was told at first,that it was "just a clot" aswell..but once u see it-it just makes it all seem so real. I guess i needed to see, to accept what had happened.

When i m/c'd the first time, at 9 and a half weeks-i didnt get the chance to look-and i was in denial for so long. even after the D&C i was apparantly abusing the doctors of "stealing" my baby and all sorts..(well, the aneasthetic does sum crazy stuff to ya mind too).

I guess its up to the individual,wether they want to see or not. You shouldnt be made feel bad for wanting to see either!!
(as morbid as it sounds,i kind of would like a photo,to keep in my memory box along with bubs ashes..just so i can reassure myself that it did actually once exist,and was a real baby IYKWIM)
The geneoligy department were meant to get the photos for me, but not sure if they got to take them in time or not.

anyway,sorry for rambling- just thought it might be useful to anyone who wants to know!

Raych xxoo

Hi Mahalia-anne

So sorry to hear of your loss! I suffered a miscarriage at 10 weeks and had a d&c (1.5 wks ago). I am still in shock over the whole thing as it was totally unexpected (I suppose all miscarriages are) but after two healthy pregnancies, I never thought it 'would happen to me' A miscarriage is a terribly sad thing to happen and most of the time there is no explanation apart from 'it's just one of those things.'

I am in a similar situation to you in that my SIL is also pregnant and due one month before I was going to be due! I feel robbed at times and at other times I am okay - it's such a rollercoaster of emotions. But it is early days for you and it will take time to heal. You are blessed already with a beautiful child and I hope she gives you some comfort.

I was going to answer your question as to when you should start TTC again - but you have already answered your own question. I wish you best of luck...and hope to hear good news soon.


Gabriella, Chiara & angel called home

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