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thanks Sarah, I've been thinking about counselling... just not feeling 100% sure about it at this point. I've been to counselling for other things before...it did help...and I'm trying to think about all of the coping strategies they gave me and use some of those. I'll keep thinking about it...particularly when we look at TTC again...I know that I'll have a anxious first trimester.
This week I'm feeling so much better. I feel like I've turned a bit of a corner. I've been eating healthy, exercising everyday and as a result ... sleeping so much better. exercise does wonders for your mental health. I'm feeling good that I'm doing something positive for my body...and I'm already feeling more energised and positive.
I called my doc today to see if any of the test results were back yet. I spoke to the midwife and she said that the blood tests were back and all looked normal but they are still waiting for mine and my husbands chromosome analysis to come back. she's going to chase them up and call me back in the next few days. Hopefully we won't have to wait much longer.
Setting myself some positive short term goals and rewards.
1. get through busy report period at school (next three weeks) and I am going to get a new hair cut/style.
2. lose 2kgs...buy a new dress ( have lost half a kilo this week already) .

I hope that you girls you well xx
I can totally understand how you're feeling and its a very sad place to be in. We were blessed with our son in January 2012. We then got married June 2013 and decided to wait until just after the wedding to start TTC our second. Between the birth of our son and our wedding pretty much all our friends had their first child. I always wanted to have my kids close together (approx 2yrs) and because the first came so easily I simply assumed the second would come just as easily. I was wrong. I fell pregnant after the first month of being off the pill. A great excitement! We had just told our families and the following day I miscarried at 7weeks. At first I didn't want to tell anyone but as people kept asking "when are you having your second?" I decided to tell them about the miscarriage. There were 2 good points to me giving that response. 1. It helped me to come to terms with what had happened. And some people gave some enlightening responses that helped with closure and put my mind at ease that it wasn't my fault. 2. It stopped people asking me all the time when we were going to have our next baby which was putting a large amount of pressure on me.
Then in January and February 2014 I had 2 chemical miscarriages. I also tell people about those if they ask because of the same reasons I mentioned. Then I too had 3 people tell me they were expecting which tore my heart out because I wanted that second baby so badly. I was happy they could bring a baby into the world but there was still hurt inside that I couldn't do the whole "pregnancy" thing with them.
After 8months of TTC and 3miscarriages, I was pretty much done. The disappointment and the pressure I was putting on myself was too great. Then when I thought all was lost, I got a positive test. 6 positive tests to be exact:) We can finally say I'm pregnant again and due January 2nd 2015. I can say though that after a miscarriage, the nervous feeling is still there and I'm guessing it will be there the whole pregnancy so I'm taking it one day at a time and praying every night that we get another beautiful baby.
Don't give up. You're not alone. Many of us have been through the same thing and have felt the same pain. You may even find that other people you know have also had miscarriages but in my case they only told me when I told them what I was going through. Everything will be ok smile
Thanks KaiPsMummy... thank you for sharing your story and congratulations on your pregnancy...I am hoping and praying for a safe and happy pregnancy for you.

We got some test results back...all normal. So looking like it has just been bad luck rather than anything actually wrong with us.

It's been 8 weeks since the D&C and still no return of normal cycle. It look 10 weeks with the last one and that time I found out I was pregnant again. We were told not to try and fall pregnant while we wait for test results to come back. Have been cramping a bit in the last week or so...so hopefully my period will come back soon. Not worried about falling pregnant again right away. I feel like my body and mind are only just starting to feel normal and back on track ...I know that I'm not in the right head space yet to be able to deal with a new pregnancy. Am going to start taking my vitamins again after this period tho and the doc has recommended some for hubby to take too.
We have been invited to a wedding in Spain in October. We weren't going to go because I would have been 8 months pregnant...but now we are finally starting to do some planning and are going to make the trip. It has given us something to focus on together and I am trying to be grateful for these new opportunities that have opened up for us. Our life may be taking a different direction than we thought....I'm only just starting to feel ok with that. My doctor told me that when we finally have a baby it will be so precious. I am grateful that I know that I will never take any of it for granted. I will be able to really enjoy every moment with the knowledge of what an incredible miracle a new baby is. I have been listening to my friend whinge about her pregnancy...about feeling fat and missing out on holidays etc. Sometimes it makes me cranky...she has no idea how lucky she is to have a beautiful daughter and another on the way.
Still not feeling sure about telling people...I guess I know that in the long run it would be helpful...but we live in such a small town where everyone knows everything about everyone else...we have really done well to avoid the gossip circles for this long. Hopefully one day I will feel ready to tell people and put it out there. KaiPsmummy...I think that you are so brave! I wish that I could just do it.

Have chicken soup in the slow cooker and just about to take the dogs for a walk....then sneak in for a relaxing bath. Feeling happy and content at the moment...and so very blessed to have such a wonderful husband and gorgeous friends supporting us.
got all test results back today and all are clear...bloods and chromosome tests all came back clear, as did the material they took for the D&C. feeling very relieved....at least there is nothing wrong with us....maybe just terrible cruel luck.
now just trying to get my body... both mentally and physically back in shape.

period has still not returned...8 weeks after D&C...doc wants to do an ultrasound to check everything out if not back in 2 weeks. have been told that my period will return when my body is good and ready? has anyone else experienced this long delay in periods returning?
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