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announcing an elective c-section Lock Rss

just wondering - those of you that had an elective c-section for any of your births, did you announce to everyone the date once you had it booked? or did you just tell certain people and keep it quiet from the masses, so you could still have the big birth announcement and element of surprise?

i had a natural birth last time and due to complications from that i am having an elective c-s this time. i am thinking of just telling both of our parents and my sister the date of the c-section and asking them to not tell anyone. that way we will still get to make the announcement IYKWIM?

also, after having such a traumatic birth last time i really struggled with having heaps of visitors afterwards in hossy. i can imagine it will be the same this time, recovering from major surgery as well as coming to grips with having a newborn again. do you think it is rude to ask that visitors not come on the first day to give me some time to recover and try to establish breastfeeding in peace (i will word it a bit nicer obviously!!). i had so many visitors last time that i felt uncomfortable figuring out bfing, and getting my big boobies out in front of people, and i think it contributed to the issues that we had with it.

Although I didnt have a c-section we did not tell anyone, not a soul that we were going to hospital when labour started. Nobody knew anything until DH called everyone to tell them DD had arrived.

I wanted it that way and preferred it. If you trust your mum and sister not to say anything then tell them and no one else. Otherwise keep it a secret even from them.

I would keep a secret again but would most likely have to tell whoever I left DD with what was happening, unless I can work my way around that smile

Good luck with BF this time round wink
I was induced with DS1, & had elective c-secs booked for DS2 & DD. All 3 times we kept the dates to ourselves. I wanted to keep it a surprise. It's part of the fun of having babies - when they are going to be born.

We told immediate family at the last minute. With the last 2 we of course gave enough notice for someone to look after the other kids.

If you don't think you want visitors straight away, then get DH to mention it at the time of telling. Even if he says you're pretty groggy from the drugs & aren't up to seeing anyone (which won't be a huge lie anyway). Child birth is exhausting - natural or c-sec & people shouldn't expect to visit straight away anyway.

We had friends booked in for c-sec just before I had DD. They told us the date & then asked when I was booked in. I think they were a bit shocked to be told that we were keeping that information to ourselves.

ETA another way of preventing visitors is not telling people until visiting hours are finished. That way they have no choice but to wait til the next day

If it were me, I think I'd be upfront about the date and just say I don't know what time it will be. As for visitors, no it is not rude at all to ask people to leave you for the first day. I had all VB and asked for nobody but my DH and kids on the first night, and then only family the next day. You learn the hard way, when you have visitors arrive while they are still giving you blood transfusions and are so out of it you don't get to hold your own baby before everyone else does grrrrr.
I had an elective c-sec for ds2 (breech)

we told everyone the day and that we were heading in! We ended up the last elective of the morn so even though we were at hossy by 7am he wasn't here toll nearly 1pm.

Dh sent out a group text when he was here as well as personally calling my parents, his parents and my good friend who had been waiting by their phones all morn lol
I have had 2 emergency c-sections so will be booked in for a planned csection next time. I would definitly keep it a secret from most people other than those u mentioned as you want there to be some suprise.

As for asking people not to come and see you straight away that is definitly fair enough. Not that your going to be in huge amounts of pain but it takes a couple of days of getting used to things, especially the breast feeding.

Good luck with it all hun. X

My first was born via emergency c-section after complications in labour. Due to all of the issues with DS's birth my next preganancy -DD was to be an elective C-Section. We told everyone the date of when the c- section was to be but not the time, we just said we didn't know that yet. We planned to just send out an SMS to everyone after she was birth with the birth notice and saying "visitors are welcome after a certain day (2 days after the birth)". I ended up going into labour at 36 weeks so DD was born via an emergency C-Section.

Give yourself as much time as you want and you feel you need. As for not telling everyone that is your choice but a baby's arrival is still a magical event regardless of whether is is know before hand or not.
thanks for those replies everyone. i now don't feel bad telling DH that i only want to tell our parents and my sister. we don't have any other family on my side and my sister will keep it quiet. my mum will be having DS so she needs to know, and i don't think its fair to not tell the in laws if my parents know IYKWIM. and DH would agree.

visitors last time were so over the top even on the second day - i had about 7 people there at one stage, when DS did his first poo i wanted to change the nappy myself (!!!!) but because i was on an IV drip and had a catheter i couldn't get up to do it, and DH and my mum were both as bad as each other trying to figure it all out, everyone was yelling over each other, FIL and my dad were drinking whiskey, it was pandamonium!!! i got so overwhelmed by it all that i told DH later i didn't want any visitors the next day. i also missed out on giving DS his first bath, or even seeing him have it. i don't want to miss out on anything like that this time since it could be our last bub.

You're in WA right? Are you doing it KEMH??
The nurses there are great and let them know under no circumstances are anyone other than your DH and xxxx (whoever you feel appropriate to see) are allowed in until you say so.
I had DD1 and DD2 there and my 1st I had chaos going on, the nurse came in to do a check and kicked everyone out!!

Friends of ours have told everyone they were having an elective c/s, mostly because they were travelling a long distance to do it, so people need to know what they were doing, as to not turn up inappropriately.

I had a booked induction and we told no one when we were going in. I think it's nice for your parents to get a suprise phone call rather than waiting. I had no visitors except immediate family and my best friend at the hospital. DD was in special care and I refused to let anyone else bond with her before I got to.
hey hun

You may not remember but when I was pregnant with Zara we told everyone that if I was going to have another c/s we were not going to tell anyone the date for exactly the reasons you're thinking.

When we got the original c/s date we only told sis in law who was going to be looking after Stella, then as you know things changed & so did the date after being in hospital overnight and being told Miss Z was going to be born the next day. We ended up telling the grandparents the night before she was born. It was still a surprise.

Zara was born Friday morning and we insisted that no one was to visit until Sunday and we had left strict instructions with the midwives that no visitors were allowed. Thankfully everyone co-operated.

In these circumstances I think you have to put your foot down, you know what to expect, you'll have a new born AND Josh who will be dearly missing you and wont understand what's going on for the first few days at least.

Use that extra time you'll be in hospital to learn as much as you can - visitors can wait!
DS1 was an elective c/s (breech) and apart from our parents NOBODY knew the date. I ended up going into labour early but he still came on date the surgery was booked smile I had called my parents and they were there but it was my choice!

DS2 I attempted a VBAC. We told our parents and 3 of my best friends when I headed off to the hospital. After 16 hours of labour I ended up with another c/section but at least the suprise was still there. We were lucky that he was born at 8.30pm and nobody had time to come visit wink

I think half the fun of having baby is telling everyone of the arrival. I love the suspense so wanted to keep the date a secret. Maybe you could just put off telling the masses until the next day ???? Just tell the immediate family and let them know prior to the day that you want the time to yourselves.

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