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Mouthy Mum! Rss

My mum has been going on and on to hubby and I about when we are going to be pregnant with baby no.2!!! Little does she know that we have been trying since January with no luck! I don't particularly want her and the rest of the family to know that we are having difficulty falling pregnant as my sister is due at the end of the year and I don't want her to feel bad or think that I am jealous (because I am soooo not... I can honestly say that I am excited for her!) How do I get Mum to put a sock in it? Don't get me wrong... she's a great Mum... I think she just thinks that we are wanting a big age gap between siblings!

Hi Mia,

This is a very hard situation. It took us approx 4 years to get pregnant with Lachie (via IVF). Although it wasn't my Mum making comments people were saying things to her like 'don't they want children'. Mum knew what we were going through and found this very hard to cope with when people commented. (We chose to keep the IVF thing private and are glad we did). Then 2 months after giving birth one of my Aunties rang me specifically to ask when I would be having my second as she didn't want me to have a big age gap!!!! I couldn't believe it. (We were only given 5% chance of getting pregnant on IVF so a second child was unlikely). We did choose to try again and after almost a year on IVF we received another miracle and would you believe people are already saying if its a boy will you try again for a girl.

Anyway, maybe you could say to your Mum that if you and DH try again it will be when the time is right for the three of you. Also, you are looking forward to the birth of your sister's child and want to concentrate on that. It may buy you a bit of time. I actually had advice from IVF counsellors as to what to say to people when they asked me but I'm not sure it would work for a Mum. Things like "Is there a specific reason you need to know my plans". (A Mum might say yes!!)

Best wishes TTC #2. I will be sending positive thoughts your way.

Hi Mia, I would nicely say to her next time she says something - 'Mum, we do want a second child, but it will happen when we are ready for it, not everyone else. I will let you know when it is coming, but until then can you please leave the subject alone"
Or you could burst into tears, tell her all that is happening and make her realise how she is making you feel by being on your back a bit! LOL!
First bit might be better......

DD1 July 2004 DD2 August 2007 DS September 2009

And best luck in falling pregas with no. 2!!

DD1 July 2004 DD2 August 2007 DS September 2009

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