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Excited yet really nervous... Lock Rss

I have my 2nd specialist appt tomorrow...
My first he took my old (12months since 'stopped' working) implannon out, did a pap smear and looked at my blood work and advised me I had a 24/48month window to fall pregnant before things could start getting difficult to fall.

My husband and I left the appointment full of great advice and feeling great (he really wanted to make us informed with our options etc) and we both decided to 'get healthy' as we had both put on weight and would assist with us falling if we started to focus on our health as well..

Well fast track 6 weeks and even though I had a reminder in my phone to get my blood work for tomorows appt I completely forgot and in a panic called the receptionist to fax a copy to a local pathology place that are rushed to in the hope they can get the results done in time for my appt tomorrow... Fingers crossed!!! So not only did I completely forget that but we have also 'given up' on the healthy life style thing... junk food, take out is all back on our menu.. Feeling really guilty as tomorrow we need to decide a way forward and Im worried that I am jerpidising my chances of having a 3rd baby...

Not to mention that we realllllly havent had a good,long, important talk about if we are going to go down the clomid course or what... I kinda feel like im now rushed because we wasted these 6 weeks not doing anything positive... the first 2 weeks were great but now we are in a slump and i dont even kno what im going to say to the specialist when he asks us what we wanna do..

How did I let this time go past without us making a decision together?? I mean I know I would be saying Yes lets start but I dont want to talk for my husband!!!!

Im excited to go back and check my hormone levels again and make sure my pap is all ok but i am worried we dont have an 'answer'

Madison Jade 28.08.06 & Kobyn James 20.06.08

So today is the day.... in 2 hours actually!!

I said to DH last night that the doctor will ask u what we want to do, how we wnat to proceed and I wanted to be on the same page (obviously we should have been talking about this WAYY before the night ebfore like weeks but silly me didnt and he didnt bring it up) and he decides to put on me that he doesnt want to try for a 3rd... medically or other wise..

FLAWED ME!!! I said well i dont see why we need to go back to see the doctor, to get resultson how my hormones are now - if your not interested in trying then I dont want to hear my results, to hear AGAIN that i have limited time to fall pregnant and be crushed again (I already was crushed!)

We have not been using protection for AGES and we all know how babies are made if he isnt interested in getting assistance from the specialist but if we fall pregnant naturally will he still feel the same? If thats the case I feel like buying condoms and taking them home and saying if you dont want to actively try then I dont want an accident to happen!!!!

Cannot believe the night before this all comes out... its my fault I know but I also feel like hes known this was coming and why couldnt he voice his opinion earlier rather then wait for me to double check!!!

REALLY LOOKING FORWARD TO MY APPT!!! NOT - Wish I could revise the title of this post!!!

Madison Jade 28.08.06 & Kobyn James 20.06.08

How did it all go? I know how you're feeling in regards to the communication break down. It took me years to get my DH to actually communicate his feelings about starting a family. He's been happy to say one day, but as our goal year of 2013 quickly approached, he finally agreed a few months ago to start trying in October (this month). Then last week I get it out of him that a part of him isn't ready and doesnt want our life to change!!

Think he knows deep down how much this means to me though- maybe you need to have that convo with your DH? Really work out the pros and cons of trying for another. Maybe he's scared of the stress you'll both be under if you need to go through clomid etc?

Good luck! Xo
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