I think I agree with all these lovely women. They're absolutely correct in this regard. It's okay to feel that way, honey. You'll feel a lot better once it happens for you. Which I hope, happens really soon! Best of luck to you. Keep trying, you can get through it.
Mila, don't be too hard on yourself. It's fine to feel this way. I can relate so much to it! I have gone through this, exactly. It's just really hard because you feel bad. If you feel guilty about it, then it gets super tough. You can't really talk to anyone who won't understand. Only women in our situations can understand. I'm sorry you have to go through this. It's perfectly normal, though. If it's any consolation, I used to be quite jealous! I hope your luck turns around. Here's to hoping you get a BFP really soon. My prayers are with you. Sending you lots and lots of baby dust!