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Single and scared Lock Rss

Hi all
This is my first baby a little girl due in December I couldn't be happier about having her but my boyfriend if 6 years and I have just split up. It started out as a mutual break because we havnt made each other happy recently but I am seeing it as more long term now ???? I am only 22 and feeling really alone and scared he still wants to be around for our daughter and I believe him but it's so hard because I'm terrified to do this alone and of being a let down to my daughter I'm really struggling. Any advice?
Thank you ladies.
Oh Beautiful we do our best as parents being a single mum can be a lot harder not going to lie..... but you can do it with or with out him I have always seen it from my mums view "you have kids for you, not the dad or grandparents but for you.... I have 2 and one on the way all the same dad but I am single with my last 2 you can do great things just remember to teach your daughter that us girls can do everything the boys are the helpers lol
You might be scared and that's totally normal, but you can do it. And you will. You don't really have much of choice. Don't doubt yourself, you will be a great mum. Having kids is hard, especially when your single but it's do-able. And the joy you get out of being a mum over rides the hard stuff. Hopefully u have some family around you or even friends to support you if you ever need help. But you will be ok. We were all first time mums at some stage, and you just get through it. The hardest part in my experiance is the newborn/ baby stage. Once they start growing up to be toddlers it gets so much easier. You get more sleep and they can tell u what's wrong or if they're hungry and what not. But that hard first bit only lasts a year or so. It's not forever. Good luck, you will be ok. We're all here for advice and to listen if you need.




Thank you ladies. Have also just found out he cheated when I was 20 weeks pregnant so am not feeling the best about myself but trying to push through for my baby girl.
Hi Chez,
Sorry about the recent discovery. What a shock that must have been. Having someone cheat on you can really be a blow to your self esteem, even without the added turmoil of pregnancy hormones! Just remember, his actions are a reflection of HIM as a person, not you. Don't fall into the trap of wondering if you're somehow to blame. Adults need to take full responsibility for their own actions and that is especially the case when we've failed someone so completely like your ex has. Of course, it's up to you IF, how and when you forgive him but don't ever wonder what is wrong with you to have made him cheat.
Good luck with bubby. She will bring you much joy, I'm sure x
Hi chez! I have one on the way, but also have a 6 year old son, who I had when I was 22, his dad broke up with me when I was like 11 weeks, then we got back together when I was in my last 8 weeks, then I left him when my son was 7-8 months. I have done it on my own, as he moved to Aussie when my son was 13 months and has nothing to do with us. It's hard, but not the horror story it's made out to be. I went to uni, and got through many things without him, as you have other people, people who actually care. I have met someone else and now I am having my second! Life goes on and it gets better. When you have your baby, you will find out what true love is.
I know how you feel ,i felt alone and i wasnt so much scared just worryed more so , but tryed not to feel scared or alone , try change your mind set to staying positive, Best thing to do is surrounded your self with lots of family and friends.Go on dinner dates and lunch dates with your friends or family ,go shopping ect , do things that keep you happy dont worry about anyone else focus on baby and you easya said then done when your going through a break up i know but it'll bring you up having people who love and care for you around , enjoy your pregnancy! . As for the father , if he says hes going to be there for baby good on him , but dont expect anything from him because if you have expectations you'll only be let down and angry and disappointed all the time if he doesn't meet those expectations. And remember your the boss now your rasing baby, what ever you say goes when it comes to you and baby , Its hard now but thing will get better . You will never be a let down to your daughter ! You are all your baby needs , a loving caring mother. Time will heals all wounds smile . I hope making sence and on the right track .
I'm glad I found this - how are you coping now? My partner left me at 20 weeks. We had a big fight and he decided he didn't love me anymore, just like *poof* that. We're old enough to know better, but he still went this way - in a week he's moved back to Auckland - I'm in Wellington and he wants NOTHING to do with me. So I'm contemplating moving out of my flat to somewhere more stable and near friends, I could move home to Palmy but I really don't want to. It's so hard not contacting him.

Are you still single or have you sorted out your differences? How have you coped? any advice?
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